Telling each other that we’re… arriving

[Mumfromoutnumbered]

Just for fun really. DP and I have had this discussion before, and it occurred again earlier.

Neither of us are noisy during sex, but as he finishes, he always gives me advance notice and tells me it’s about to happen. He says he’s doing it out of politeness, and that I should do the same.

Politeness!

Frankly the last thing I’m thinking about in that moment is being fucking polite! I never announce it. He says he can’t tell when it happens and wants to know.

Is announcing it a conscious thing? I guess some people say it in the moment or if they don’t want their partner to stop, but surely not whilst thinking ‘Oh I’d better let the other person know so that they won’t think me rude…’

Does he need to know? Am I really being impolite?! I wouldn’t care if he didn’t tell me in advance. The bloody grunt and the fact that he then stops is generally the telltale sign! AIBU?

The whole thing makes me laugh. I never went to Swiss finishing school but I always thought it fairly impolite to be humping away or lying there with my legs in the air in the first place!

I like knowing.

Ooh yes! I'm arriving! I'm arriving!

It probably just adds to the turn on if he knows you are pulling in to the station 😉

I can't speak as it's building, so he'd have no chance.

This has tickled me 🤣
My partner also announces "I'm gonna come"

No idea why... and I never thought about it til this post 🤣🤣

When I was younger I questioned a boyfriend on why some men do this. He said it was so the woman can decide where the "arrival" should happen.

My partner doesn't need notifying. He knows

But he does say, I hadn't actually thought about it before but he does that too

God if he thinks that by telling me he’s coming I’m gonna say ‘Oh go on then, wherever you like!’ he’s mistaken.

He could tell me next week’s lottery numbers and he’d still be staying in the traditional venue!

I get louder - it's my way of announcing myself 😂I think saying nothing and making no sound makes it feel like a bit of a non event.

I can always tell when DP is ...arriving...from the way his breathing changes. I tend to get all twitchy

This is the thing isn’t it? I could tell because he gets faster and then grunts. I make a little bit of noise and move about a bit. No need to actually leave the moment so as to remember to say that it’s happening!

It's two words. I'm not sure how saying them would make you leave the moment 🙈

I announce when I'm about to just in case he decides to change what he's doing or slow down lol

“Politeness” made me laugh 😆

“My dear Henrietta, out of courtesy I wish to announce my imminent arrival!”

FwB and myself both do mainly to make sure the other keeps doing what they are doing and we also edge each other so gives the indication to stop for a few seconds. I’ve pretty much always done something either getting louder or saying something, def don’t think it ruins flow etc

Do you think he wants the announcement to ensure that he doesn't "arrive" while you're still en route?

This reminds me of when I was a teenager and had just started having sex, my boyfriend asked me "did you come?" and I thought - what a fucking idiot, doesn't he know that only men can ejaculate??? Embarrassed to say that I had been having sex for quite a while before realising that women can actually orgasm. Should have gone to that Swiss finishing school to learn proper 'finishing' etiquette.

DP always does this, I’m not sure why but I like it! I think I always thought he was doing it because it’s sexy but the thought that he is doing it to be polite is really funny 🤣

DP only usually announces his "arrival" if he feels that he's arriving too early. It's generally preceded by "Oh shit sorry", which isn't terribly polite now I come to think of it. I should tell him to say "My apologies, I appear to be arriving ahead of time" or something.

😂😂😂😂

Maybe get a bell for the side of the bed? Whoever arrives first rings the bell.

Edge each other?

I thought that was a fridge and a fanny?

I like to know. I dated someone who didn’t make a sound and I never knew - could have done with knowing so I could get him to slow down a bit so I could “arrive” too! 🤣🤣

I've never failed to notice DH orgasming without being given verbal reassuring and vice versa. Tends to be pretty obvious. If not you might want to try harder 😄