To think you dont accidentally text your ex this....

[MaxwellCat]

My ex text me the other night "I love you" we haven't spoken in around 2 months or more and we've been split up for 6 years (though we have children so still in contact sometimes) everyone has told me it was obviously an "accident" aibu to think you dont "accidentally" text your ex of 6 years that you love them? How is that an accident? We haven't spoken in 2 months so I would imagine im pretty far down on his messages, also this was text message (he is blocked on whatsapp) and i imagine 99% of people communicate over WhatsApp especially if it was meant for someone he was dating! I know I don't even text anyone anymore but he was still far down from all the other texts I receive from random places. Why do people try to say this stuff is an accident when it clearly wasn't 🤔 aibu to think you dont accidentally text your ex you love them? (Fair enough if we was just speaking a few days ago but we haven't spoken in months)

Only it wasn't a mistake sorry to disappoint you!

Oh you give over and go to bed 🤣 I've said my piece. I'm not starting another discussion.

OP has some serious issues. Maybe that's why her ex isn't with her any more.

I’d probably block him on text too, tbh. There’s obviously a reason he’s blocked on WhatsApp, and this just screams silly mind games. Look at how much he’s managed to get you to think about him with one little text.

Ok, so he deliberately played you like a joke. That's so much better.

Congratulations.

Now what.

It doesn’t matter if it was an accident or deliberate. The only person this affects is you and you need support to not let him get in your head.

The only thing you should have done when you received the message was press delete. 6 years on he still has you dancing around trying to second guess his motives for days on end.

I have a friend like you - the only difference is that it has been 25 years of waiting around for any crumb that he throws in her direction - it’s ruined her life, don’t let him ruin yours.

Agree with all the other posters who think you can't be reading the same thread.

But if that's all you can see, despite what's actually been said, there's not much any of us can do about that.

OP is that you?

Honestly, you can tell it's the school holidays

Honestly, you can tell it's the school holidays

Derailing the thread? Troll hunting? Yes you can definitely see someone is bored.

I just don't agree with you. Honestly, move on. ✌️

There's literally sod all to derail here. Op asked for opinions, got them then persisted in her defiance that it wasn't an accident. As it happens it wasn't an accident. Still doesnt take away from the fact that 1) she is goading people and 2) nobody really cares why he sent it and neither should she.

I lost all empathy for op when she was deliberately goady to posters and just out to prove she was right about something. Makes me wonder what the purpose of the thread was. My guess is attention.

Don’t understand why you needed justification from mumsnet when you text him anyway asking if it was an “accident” or not..

I’ve seen your other threads before, he doesn’t love you, he hasn’t spoken to you in 2 months, I don’t want to sound harsh but he is using you/playing with your mind..

he probably knows you still have feelings for him, just because he has stated it wasn’t an accident doesn’t mean to say it was meant.

you came on here asking for opinions, people have given them, you’ve chosen to argue against it and ask him anyway? It’s been a pointless exercise for you..

he doesn’t make any effort with his children, you’ve stated on a previous threat he hasn’t paid maintenance but are arguing the fact it wasn’t an accident and he “means” he loves you.. actions speak louder then words, I would believe that if he made every ounce of effort and wanted to see you/speak to you regularly and be a decent father for his children, however, he doesn’t do any of that does he? He probably gives you as little as possible towards the children.. you made a previous thread asking “how to get him involved” if this man loved you, would you need to be asking an online forum this?

I know how shitty it is for a father to not bother with there child, my ex hasn’t seen our son in 5yrs, I used to try my best to encourage a relationship, this just caused more hurt for my son, I kept contact open for years.. as soon as he realised he couldn’t play mind games with me anymore and I decided to go through a third party due to him not coparenting decently, shock horror, he fucked off and has made no effort with our son within that 5yrs..

if your children are old enough let them make the contact, if one is younger see if someone else could communicate on your behalf, clearly you don’t have a good coparenting relationship and this will initially cause distress to the children..

don’t get wrapped up in mind games and don’t spend any more hours wasting your energy on them!
you have your blinkers on at the moment, I would have assumed his previous actions would have made you realise?

I doubt he thinks I still love him and he would be wrong if he thought that. We don't speak at all unless HE messages ME I never ever initiate conversation with him and if he does message me I answer yes/ no, perhaps because I haven't met anyone since him he assumes that which I have thought so but that's what happens when you are with the kids at all times. If people hadn't insisted it was a mistake i wouldn't have bothered message but obviously it was "for his girlfriend" well he's told me he doesn't have one because I asked so..
He has actually tried to get back with ME several times since we split up i haven't wanted to not the other way round but because I don't want to he doesn't bother with the kids.

I guess what most people don't understand is, why start several threads about the text when you claim don't want to get back with him anyway. Tbh I'd be hoping it was a mistake, not going out of my way to prove it wasn't.

Well of course he had to text you - as you blocked him on WhatsApp. Seeing as it’s not an accident - so what? Maybe he does still like you but you are not interested so that’s fine. I don’t see an issue here at all. You’re on here trying to prove to a bunch on strangers on the internet that it wasn’t an accident? But for what? It’s a little confusing and really - a waste of your time/headspace.

^^all of this. It’s a very strange thread and hard to work out.

You wanted answers OP - based on the very little info we have most PP said either an accident or trying to string you along. Sweet words are easy, but when someone shows you who they are by their actions - believe them. He could text you sweet loving words a million times over and it could still be meaningless. The description of your history is not a man who’s in love.

But you say you don’t care so what are you after here?

Are you looking for an ego boost where we all agree that he can’t live without you?
Are you thinking about taking him back?
Are you looking to mess with his head?

Why does it matter if you don’t want him anyway?

On the tiny bit of info I’ve seen it sounds like a man who likes to keep you dangling and thinks that professing deep feelings will keep you on the hook. Standard line out of the player’s book.

But hey, you know him, we don’t. If you think different then fine 🤷‍♀️

Not surprised by his answer, but this time I'd be pissed off and reply. Consciously or not he is playing mind games. Let's give him the benefit of the doubt and say he is trying to restart the relationship: this is not the way to go about it, it's manipulative. And it's not how you maintain good and appropriate relationship with your ex when she HAS to communicate with you about kids.

I'd reply something like "what makes me think it's an error is the fact that we have been separated for 6 years and your message is inappropriate. Keep those messages for your girlfriend, and only contact me to talk about our children."

How's tricks op @MaxwellCat

Even if its not an accident, it doesn't mean he truly means it. He might have been drinking. It could be a test,. You could reply/or object and he could reply and say he texted to you by mistake