To cancel the date and ditch the bloke because of this..

[Raffety]

I've been talking to a man I met online for the past week and a half. We have a date set up for next week. He's very chatty, extremely keen, bordering on too keen really but I was open to seeing how the date. I have been completely put off.

He has taken a picture of me from my social media and sent it to this random bloke (random to me atleast, it's his friend) saying this is the pretty woman I'm taking out next week.

The friend replies "she ain't pretty" and asks him to send a picture of me without a filter on. There's no filter on the picture in the first place.

He then asks him to show him a picture of my teeth!

I know all of this as the guy I'm scheduled to go on a date with thought it would be a great idea to screenshot their exchange and send it to me alongside a request for a picture of my teeth.

Who the fuck does that?

What that says to me is that he has a total disregard for boundaries, my privacy and decency in general. His friend is obviously a prick. Probably the sort who insults people for fun under the guise of "banta mate"

I know I'm not BU for cancelling a date for whatever reason I see fit but do you see this the way I see it or am I being OTT due to embarrassment? How would this make you feel?

I've NC for this.

Block him. How has he even got access to your social media?

Bloody hell! Block and run. He's not a contender

We followed each other on Instagram

That’s awful! I can’t believe he did it and then shared the exchange with you saying you weren’t pretty! He must be extremely thick.

Block

Cancel the date (and tell him why) and then block him.

Block him. It's all a bit creepy and weird.

Let him know that if we wants to get to know someone romantically in the future this is definitely not the way to approach it.

You can do better!

I’d block him because he’s clearly an absolute idiot.

It's so tone deaf isn't it. Completely stupid.

I wonder if it's a complicated way of 'negging' you - why else would he send you a message telling you his mate doesn't think you're pretty?

Definitely block!

The fact that he doesn't understand this conversation between him and his arse of a mate should never have been shared would be enough to put me off him. The fact he is mates with someone like that would also be enough to put me off him. The fact he thinks it's appropriate to ask for a photo of your teeth before a date would also be enough to put me off him.

In short, no I do not think you are unreasonable to sack this date off.

Years ago before I met DH I was chatting to a bloke who, having seemed normal to that point, referred to women as "snakes in high heels". He was extremely confused when I reacted poorly and cut contact with him, because it was apparently what his mates said and not him. Aside from anything else, the fact he was seemingly so socially unaware as to have no concept that it was an inappropriate thing to say was utterly unattractive to me.

I'm definitely blocking him.

Imagine going out to dinner with somebody like that, he'd be taking pictures whilst I'm trying to enjoy the food. Gross.

Bizarrro.

'show me her teeth. Are they aware you're a human and not a mare?

He seems like the kind of guy that once you are in a relationship with him, you'll have to deal with his toxic friends who are
Misogynistic and will constantly be poisoning him full of shit.

Sounds pretty vile to me.

To quote Roz from Frasier, “I’d dump him like radioactive waste”!

Ah well.at least you know he's a dick.and you haven't wasted any time on a date ,just block.him.and move on.

What a prize twat. Onwards and upwards!

Run. ... Block. And tighten your SM security

This!! With bells. Him and his mate are both absolute tossers. And “yours” is a thick tosser.

Dump, dump, dump.

Please tell him why you're not continuing with him. That he needs to find better mates and not share shit like that with them.

I know all of this as the guy I'm scheduled to go on a date with thought it would be a great idea to screenshot their exchange and send it to me alongside a request for a picture of my teeth.

I have to admit I lol'd.

He's batshit.

Properly batshit.

He also hangs around with c#nts.

It's a good thing that he's so mad and stupid that he actually did this before you got involved. Bullet dodged.

Definitely negging. My mate said this but I'm the good guy..

Just as a compliment from a 3rd party passed on is amplified, so is a criticism. There is literally no need to ever tell the person that someone has said something negative. So if you do, it reflects on you.

Your instincts are totally correct.

Tell him it’s not appropriate and because of this you won’t meet him. Byee. Then block him and move on.

You’re definitely right to ditch this dickhead. How fucking weird to admit to his nearly date that he’s capable of being such a shithead.

The positive of all this is that you’ve found out now, before you had to waste any time or money on this loser.