I've been talking to a man I met online for the past week and a half. We have a date set up for next week. He's very chatty, extremely keen, bordering on too keen really but I was open to seeing how the date. I have been completely put off.
He has taken a picture of me from my social media and sent it to this random bloke (random to me atleast, it's his friend) saying this is the pretty woman I'm taking out next week.
The friend replies "she ain't pretty" and asks him to send a picture of me without a filter on. There's no filter on the picture in the first place.
He then asks him to show him a picture of my teeth!
I know all of this as the guy I'm scheduled to go on a date with thought it would be a great idea to screenshot their exchange and send it to me alongside a request for a picture of my teeth.
Who the fuck does that?
What that says to me is that he has a total disregard for boundaries, my privacy and decency in general. His friend is obviously a prick. Probably the sort who insults people for fun under the guise of "banta mate"
I know I'm not BU for cancelling a date for whatever reason I see fit but do you see this the way I see it or am I being OTT due to embarrassment? How would this make you feel?
I've NC for this.
AIBU?
To cancel the date and ditch the bloke because of this..
Raffety · 06/03/2023 11:44
Am I being unreasonable?
3003 votes. Final results.
POLLblubberball · 06/03/2023 12:29
What was he going to have you do? Have you walk around a pen in front of his mates, show your teeth, slap your arse and say "She comes from good stock"?
You've had a lucky escape.
botheredbythis · 06/03/2023 12:09
Wow. What a dick. Block immediately.
Who are these men? My friend had breast cancer. She told a guy she had been chatting to online (before they met). His response? Was the photo she put up pre or post cancer? And had her...drum roll for the most insensitive comment EVER...breasts changed?
southlondoner02 · 06/03/2023 11:51
I wonder if it's a complicated way of 'negging' you - why else would he send you a message telling you his mate doesn't think you're pretty?
Definitely block!
Coffeepot72 · 06/03/2023 14:16
I swear we as women were genuinely better off when religion and social rules meant that a man had to ask permission from the Father to take his daughter out, and then had to return her by 10 pm. As women collectively it seems we are shit at exercising self respect or enforcing decent behaviour. And therefore men get away with it
But I think @Theredfoxfliesatmidnight might have a point?
Coffeepot72 · 06/03/2023 14:16
I swear we as women were genuinely better off when religion and social rules meant that a man had to ask permission from the Father to take his daughter out, and then had to return her by 10 pm. As women collectively it seems we are shit at exercising self respect or enforcing decent behaviour. And therefore men get away with it
But I think @Theredfoxfliesatmidnight might have a point?
Fuwari · 06/03/2023 14:34
I think they get worse with age! I’m in my 50s and was messaging a guy (similar age). Sent him a pic (decent shot, full length) and he actually said “come on, I know you can do better than that”. I was flabbergasted! So I decided to do better and block him 😂I’ve given up on OLD. The behaviour from guys on there just seems to get worse.
ClawedButler · 06/03/2023 14:43
Male friend of mine once told me that men don't really change past the age of 14, "we just get better at hiding it" and it's proven to me time and time again!
I was negged once by a bizarre homunculus in a pub garden. Went on a rant about my clothing and how men prefer a different style but nonetheless he was willing to take me on if there was money in it for him. I just remember staring at him, drink in hand, like a fish had just jumped out of the pond and started doing BMX tricks.
Coffeepot72 · 06/03/2023 14:16
I swear we as women were genuinely better off when religion and social rules meant that a man had to ask permission from the Father to take his daughter out, and then had to return her by 10 pm. As women collectively it seems we are shit at exercising self respect or enforcing decent behaviour. And therefore men get away with it
But I think @Theredfoxfliesatmidnight might have a point?
Fuwari · 06/03/2023 14:34
I think they get worse with age! I’m in my 50s and was messaging a guy (similar age). Sent him a pic (decent shot, full length) and he actually said “come on, I know you can do better than that”. I was flabbergasted! So I decided to do better and block him 😂I’ve given up on OLD. The behaviour from guys on there just seems to get worse.
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Fuwari · 06/03/2023 14:34
I think they get worse with age! I’m in my 50s and was messaging a guy (similar age). Sent him a pic (decent shot, full length) and he actually said “come on, I know you can do better than that”. I was flabbergasted! So I decided to do better and block him 😂I’ve given up on OLD. The behaviour from guys on there just seems to get worse.
ClawedButler · 06/03/2023 14:43
Male friend of mine once told me that men don't really change past the age of 14, "we just get better at hiding it" and it's proven to me time and time again!
I was negged once by a bizarre homunculus in a pub garden. Went on a rant about my clothing and how men prefer a different style but nonetheless he was willing to take me on if there was money in it for him. I just remember staring at him, drink in hand, like a fish had just jumped out of the pond and started doing BMX tricks.
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