To be so angry with my 19 year old son

Lovelycupofcoffee · 2023-02-18T23:47:25+00:00

So my son has announced today that he had his review at work and told them he’s looking for other jobs . They said they were happy to keep him employed full time but after this news he’s being let go . Surely (and in my employment experience) you get another job first . He was earning good money in this job . I know he wasn’t keen on working weekends but giving up a job that pays good money without another job to go to just seems like utter madness. I was so angry this morning I had to go out for a few hours .

Nimbostratus100 · 18/02/2023 23:49

very silly of him

sweeneytoddsrazor · 18/02/2023 23:51

Well at best it was naive of him. But it sounds as though they have dismissed him as opposed to he has given it up.

He should have kept quiet, lesson hopefully learned.

LIZS · 18/02/2023 23:52

Daft, much easier to get a new job while working. Does he get any notice or with immediate effect.

SnarkyBag · 18/02/2023 23:53

What a plonker! Although not surprised some young adults seem to have no clue how to approach employment these days. I’m agog at half the shite that comes out my DS’s mouth in relation to finding working and being employed!

Original poster

Lovelycupofcoffee · 18/02/2023 23:54

@LIZS so he has to work 2 weeks notice. Let’s see how he gets on running his car with no money .

OP posts:

TheObstinateHeadstrongGirl · 18/02/2023 23:55

He got sacked for saying he was job hunting? And it’s HIM you’re mad at?!

I don’t blame him for wanting to leave somewhere that will sack him simply for not wanting to stick around forever.

Also, some people’s 19yo’s Sri I too much, are on drugs, are violent or in prison. And you needed a few hours away because he wants to look for a new job?

Get a grip

Sparklesocks · 18/02/2023 23:55

Silly. But maybe a good life lesson for how to navigate job hunting when in enjoyment.

butterfliedtwo · 18/02/2023 23:56

That's just stupid. Hopefully he'll find something else soon then.

SnarkyBag · 18/02/2023 23:58

TheObstinateHeadstrongGirl · 18/02/2023 23:55

He got sacked for saying he was job hunting? And it’s HIM you’re mad at?!

I don’t blame him for wanting to leave somewhere that will sack him simply for not wanting to stick around forever.

Also, some people’s 19yo’s Sri I too much, are on drugs, are violent or in prison. And you needed a few hours away because he wants to look for a new job?

Get a grip

Ha ha yes let’s never get pissy with our teens when they make dumb decisions because at least they are not violent drug addicts who’ve done time! That’s setting expectations a little low don’t you think?

ThinWomansBrain · 18/02/2023 23:59

naïve
maybe someone brought him up thinking it was always right to be honest and tell the truth 🙄

TheObstinateHeadstrongGirl · 19/02/2023 00:00

SnarkyBag · 18/02/2023 23:58

Ha ha yes let’s never get pissy with our teens when they make dumb decisions because at least they are not violent drug addicts who’ve done time! That’s setting expectations a little low don’t you think?

Show quote history

But it’s not even remotely a big deal - he will get another job, the market is very much in favour of employees at the moment.

But yes - perspective is crucial especially with teenagers!

Im shocked that people aren’t more horrified he’s been sacked for stating he’s looking for another job. Pretty sure that isn’t entirely legal.

FredInYourHead · 19/02/2023 00:05

Well it was daft to tell them, I guess he'll know not to do that again in future

I agree with this though, @TheObstinateHeadstrongGirl He got sacked for saying he was job hunting? And it’s HIM you’re mad at?!

I don’t blame him for wanting to leave somewhere that will sack him simply for not wanting to stick around forever.

I'm pretty shocked they've told him to leave.

KettrickenSmiled · 19/02/2023 00:05

TheObstinateHeadstrongGirl · 19/02/2023 00:00

But it’s not even remotely a big deal - he will get another job, the market is very much in favour of employees at the moment.

But yes - perspective is crucial especially with teenagers!

Im shocked that people aren’t more horrified he’s been sacked for stating he’s looking for another job. Pretty sure that isn’t entirely legal.

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Of course it's legal.
Anybody can be sacked for anything, if they haven't worked for the company for 2 years,

keeprunning55 · 19/02/2023 00:08

19 year olds have lots to learn in life. So do, come to that and I’m much, much older!
Hopefully, he’ll get another job sorted quickly.

TheObstinateHeadstrongGirl · 19/02/2023 00:10

KettrickenSmiled · 19/02/2023 00:05

Of course it's legal.
Anybody can be sacked for anything, if they haven't worked for the company for 2 years,

Show quote history

Actually, they can’t.

Mothership4two · 19/02/2023 00:11

YABU to be furious about it IMO. He was a bit too honest and made a mistake - he's young, he will probably make a lot more.

Original poster

Lovelycupofcoffee · 19/02/2023 00:13

just to clarify I was upset as before he got this job he was in a really bad place with his mental health. Passing his driving test and starting work really helped him a lot so obviously I don’t want him to go through that again . He has interviews lined up apparently so I’m sure it will all be ok .

OP posts:

TheObstinateHeadstrongGirl · 19/02/2023 00:13

As an aside - and I’m certainly not a champion of Gen Z attitudes (in fact they mostly piss me off in the workplace, I find them wake-willed, rude and entitled) - I think the sneering about young people’s attitudes to work may be coming from a place that is quite dated.

As annoying as they can be, they have their pick of well paid jobs, they know their worth and they aren’t afraid to ask for it. The attitudes gone by of simpering and sucking up to the boss aren’t the done thing with young people and given the rate at which they’re moving up the career ladder, maybe they have got it right and we shouldn’t be the ones sneering.

TheObstinateHeadstrongGirl · 19/02/2023 00:15

Lovelycupofcoffee · 19/02/2023 00:13

just to clarify I was upset as before he got this job he was in a really bad place with his mental health. Passing his driving test and starting work really helped him a lot so obviously I don’t want him to go through that again . He has interviews lined up apparently so I’m sure it will all be ok .

He will.

The job market is off the scale and he will likely get several offers from places that won’t boot him out as easily.

Ive been a manager of young people and TBH if they told me they were looking elsewhere I’d be glad of the heads up so I can prepare for longer - I would never expect a 19yo to never move on!

Lavender14 · 19/02/2023 00:16

TheObstinateHeadstrongGirl · 18/02/2023 23:55

He got sacked for saying he was job hunting? And it’s HIM you’re mad at?!

I don’t blame him for wanting to leave somewhere that will sack him simply for not wanting to stick around forever.

Also, some people’s 19yo’s Sri I too much, are on drugs, are violent or in prison. And you needed a few hours away because he wants to look for a new job?

Get a grip

This^ anyone is entitled to look for new opportunities. This actually reflects so badly on the employer that they have no interest in his development or progression. They should have asked what changes could be made to keep him. And as long as he's dedicated and diligent in his work and his performance is good then this seems really out of order. I've only worked one place where I've not told them I was looking elsewhere because I needed my manager for references.

Either his employer is not great or he's worded it very badly or there's been performance issues. If that's not the case I'd be on his side.

EmmaEmerald · 19/02/2023 00:17

But why did he tell them that?!

TheObstinateHeadstrongGirl · 19/02/2023 00:17

EmmaEmerald · 19/02/2023 00:17

But why did he tell them that?!

Does it matter?

Didn’t warrant him being sacked

itswednesdayy · 19/02/2023 00:19

Haha at my current employer I’m so open with them that I’m applying for others jobs. Managers have checked over my applications, given advice to improve and authorised them (for internal postings) and I’ve had time off for interviews. Not all employers react badly when staff move on. I’m going for promotion so it’s not like they think I’m leaving for a level transfer

Mothership4two · 19/02/2023 00:20

EmmaEmerald · 19/02/2023 00:17

But why did he tell them that?!

Obviously didn't realise the consequences

Teenagehorrorbag · 19/02/2023 00:42

TheObstinateHeadstrongGirl · 19/02/2023 00:00

But it’s not even remotely a big deal - he will get another job, the market is very much in favour of employees at the moment.

But yes - perspective is crucial especially with teenagers!

Im shocked that people aren’t more horrified he’s been sacked for stating he’s looking for another job. Pretty sure that isn’t entirely legal.

Show quote history

Unless he has worked for them for a year (or it might be two) they can let him go for whatever reason they want. He's an idiot for mentioning it.

PPs blaming the company should bear in mind that most firms want staff who want to work for them. If DS is making it clear he doesn't like the job and is actively looking to leave - then why would they want to keep him? Depends of course how easy they find it to recruit a replacement, but if they think they can get someone else and someone better, then they have every right to go for it.

The only other option would be for DS and his boss to discuss what he doesn't like about the job and see if there might be ways to resolve that. If that isn't likely - then DS was certainly silly to show his hand up front and will hopefully learn from his mistake. I know I'm ancient and judgemental - but it does seem that I keep hearing stories about young people these days behaving in really entitled ways when they start out in the world of work - not sure what the solution is........