FIL has messed up my front garden … AIBU?

[Rosieposey91]

FIL offered to do our front garden in our new house for us. Originally I wasn’t keen on the idea as he didn’t put my son’s bedroom furniture together very well. However with the cost of living it meant to have what we really wanted would take a good couple years to afford. I agreed to him doing some pebbles and fake plants etc and already started off on the wrong foot as he went against my wish for big pebbles and got smaller ‘tacky’ looking ones. He then let us pay for the paint as we wanted a darker grey colour despite saying it was all his treat. That’s not an issue but also has asked me to order the fake plants etc so isn’t ‘really’ treating us to it. Bearing in mind these things aren’t that expensive … then today he puts in some slabs that 1) don’t match our other slabs 2) weren’t what we agreed , we agreed concrete not slabs 3) are much larger than the slabs we have so look completely odd.

it was so awkward as my husband wasn’t here, so I just agreed that it would look ok when painted but inside I was thinking this looks so cheap and tacky and rushed.

I’ve told my partner and thankfully he fully agrees it looks rubbish.

now I’m stuck as to what to do, ask him to take the slabs up and let him carry on or just wait and save and get it done exactly how we want it. All along we have said no to him doing it and he kept insisting , I didn’t let the MIL be involved as last time she was stood on MY drive saying this will go here and we will have that there etc … they completely baby my husband but I won’t have them baby me, I’ve always been independent and my parents have let me have my own mind etc.

AIBU?

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Not a fan of the fake plants but OP, I don't think it looks as bad as you think it does. It's redeemable! 😊

If it were me, I'd scrap the topiary balls and replace with some pots with a few evergreen plants in. They'll take virtually no maintenance (honestly!) and will distract from the stones/slabs until you can save up to get it done as you'd like.

I think if you get fake plants you can’t really complain about anything else looking tacky. So YABU

Those fake ball Bush things look awful . Get rid.

YABU to let your poor FIL do your house then complain. I really thought this is a wind up when you complain about him putting up your furniture badly.

In all fairness to those who have posted so far about their hatred or general dislike of fake plants vs real ones, can we actually move past that please and get to the nub of the issue that the OP has, which is that her FiL offered to do the front garden of their new house, but not to the OP or her DH's specifications and the OP is clearly unhappy with that, as is her DH.
The FiL has history of doing work for the OP and her DH but again, it's not up to scratch as putting together furniture for the Fil's grandchild wasn't done very well either.

My suggestion OP is to see if you can contact some local organisation who might have someone available who could come and do the work you want done but to your expectations.
www.thrive.org.uk/
www.thegardenersguild.co.uk/index.html
www.rhs.org.uk/about-the-rhs/what-we-do/what-we-do
www.groundwork.org.uk/

That list is just after doing a very quick search on the internet. Someone might be able to suggest an alternative if you want a very low maintenance garden. I would try to move away from the plastic if at all possible and instead get some real buxus plants and a few ornamental grasses that really don't require much looking after instead.

they completely baby my husband but I won’t have them baby me, I’ve always been independent and my parents have let me have my own mind etc.

And yet knowing this you agreed to them doing the garden? What did you expect?

I'm bemused at small pebbles being "tacky" but not plastic plants. Gardens take time - U've seen some very expensive instant plastic gardens and honestly unless you spent a huge amount of money they don't wear well.

If you are wanting to achieve that mediterranean rock garden or zen gardent type look you can achieve it with natural plants and materials (including rocks and pebbles) for lower cost and better overall effect if you are willing to do it over a little time. You can also have this style without excluding wildlife. The gardening topic here has posters happy to share tips and ideas and small children IME love getting involved.

Well it's cumulative isn't it. Lots and lots and lots of people tear up front lawns/gardens and replace with more tarmac or paving for cars. Replace real grass with fake grass. And instead of real plants put...fake topiary balls. Drainage gets fucked and increases flood risks, no plants for pollinators and the plastic crap leeches micro plastics into rivers and seas. So yes, the sum total of all the people doing that fucks the environment.

And whether you call them little topiary balls or just fake plants, they're plastic and therefore look tacky. Sorry they just do.

Well you did ask. Astro turf is disgusting and looks tacky as hell, and fucks the environment. Well done.

Sadly past experience seems to show that there was a high chance of it ending up this way.

It seems to be a Catch 22.

If your husband lets his parents do stuff they think of him as incapable rather than thinking of him being too busy & them being helpful.

Perhaps he should have met hos dad half way & them done it together?

DIY will never be his thing if he hands it over!

Sidestepping the various other comments about plastic, thought I'd weigh in on the prospect of a resin drive. I've been told that if you regularly manoeuvre your car, eventually you'll pull on the resin and make the surface uneven, where the turning tyres apply pressure.

Unless you drive in and out in a straight line, that is.

As for the rest of it, have what you like but others will always have their opinions.

They also look like the bottom of a budgie's cage.

Some really ridiculous comments here. I wonder what the homes of these “tacky” commenters look like. All the environment-based virtue signalling is even worse and it comes from people selectively forgetting about their food waste, driving of petrol-fuelled cars, purchasing of fast fashion, filling landfills all over the world with their unwanted crap, single use plastic, use of plastic in general, travel by plane etc etc etc.

I feel sorry for the OP. Such horrible, and most likely hypocritical, comments.

My home looks great, thanks for asking. 😃

Calls small pebbles tacky, yet has fake plants....🫢

You can follow @shitlawns on Twitter for some good advice and gardening ideas.

OP.......... the topiary balls look just as awful in the photo you posted as in my imagination.

I understand your issues re what your fil has done but..........fake plants are a massive no. Not having time for gardening is a very poor excuse. There are loads of very low maintenance options that are actual real plants.

This your lawn OP? 🤭

And the planet thanks you for it 🙏

😂😂😂

You're actually devaluing your house with all that plastic.

At least those bushes don't need much trimming.

I think really ungrateful yes. You was going to let this kind man use his own money and time for something you wasn't going to keep? If you are so particular why didn't you twobjust do it yourself? Or at least supply all the materials first?

Hilarious to plastic your outside and then name your child after a plant 😂 maybe you should call her (plastic)Ivy

Op honestly, you’d be better planting some slow growing, low maintenance plants and just letting them do their thing, there is no reason you can’t have plants.

if you want elegant/classy , then you will not achieve it with painted pebbles , plastic topiary balls and concrete. If you like the aesthetic. That’s fine, it’s your garden, but saying you can’t have plants isn’t correct. There are many beautiful plants you could have. You don’t need a plastic concrete painted garden.

What on earth is a dog loo? like a big litter tray?