Unwanted gym membership gift from DH, AIBU to be angry?

[bazthecat123]

This Christmas, my DH gifted me a very expensive gym membership for 12 months. I am very fit and active, but simply have no time to go to the gym; DH knows this. Despite being considerably overweight himself, DH has been making pointed comments about my weight for some time (I have a BMI of 20). AIBU to be pissed off?

Next year the greatest gift the OP could have is her freedom away from this hideous man.

Hopefully in time she’ll find someone pleasant and understanding and who is fit to be a decent parent. Sadly some people just aren’t cut out for being nice, @KalvinPhillipsBoots but never mind eh.

Go to the gym, you might meet someone there or you can use it as a cover story when you get asked for after-work drinks.

I'm not surprised you are depressed with this awful man for a husband. Can you imagine the kind of crap he will say about your body as it changes to grow a baby??

Gift yourself a narrow escape from a life of misery with this deluded horror by holding off on TTC whilst you take a long hard look at who and what you are married to. This is all sorts of wrong on so many levels and it will only get worse!

And hopefully her biggest gift to herself is getting rid of this drop kick. Might teach him a thing or two.

Please just ignore the obvious troll, people.

Oh my God, he sounds awful! I think this might be my first LTB but seriously, what do you get out of this erlationship. No matter how bad your depression or how low your self-esteem, please understand and accept that this is no way to live. You can do much better than him or probably be far happier alone. Just run far away from this horror, as soon as you can. There's a whole world out there just waiting for you.

Why are you ttc with this person

That's interesting...just seen that I had a comment deleted. It didn't insult any poster here. It just noted that a poster who thought it was acceptable to name call and insult your partner over their weight was partnered to a body shaming shitbag, and that probably explains why they can't see what's wrong with it.

This is so fucked up. You could comfortably gain a fairly significant amount of weight and still be within a healthy weight range. But at that point he would be unhappy with your body? Your healthy body?

Do you understand how utterly fucked it is for your partner - especially one who is so overweight that his health is at risk and you doubt his ability to parent effectively - to express this opinion? For him to feel entitled to comment on your body in this way?

Please do not have a baby with this man. I can't impress upon you enough how enormous the impact of pregnancy, childbirth, breastfeeding etc is on your body. It's a visceral experience. The Insta moms who are back in their bikinis 3 days after giving birth are not the norm. For most of us, our bodies are unrecognisable at least for a while, sometimes forever. I can't imagine having a partner like yours during that experience.

@bazthecat123 Sorry but this is now in the Mail Online. Please ask for this thread to be deleted if that causes you concern.

It's a shit article as well. Poorly written from the first page of posts.

Calm down. Babies don't arrive overnight. I hear some take all of 9 months. Perhaps the OC will use these many months to cut down on her workload? Very few women start working child friendly hours before they are pregnant.

Say what now?

That's a bit presumptuous of you - for all you know she works long shifts and has sick relatives to look after.

No need for it at all.

But it's OK if he's a fat bastard, yeah?!

I agree with previous poster's, and I don't usually go down this route, but I do think you should consider LTB - now, before you're tied to him for life by kids!

What happens if you take ill and have to go on steroids or other drugs that bloat you horribly? Or if, God forbid, you put on a few pounds after having kids?! Does he get a free pass to sleep with someone else? He's already providing you with his eventual get-out clause!

Every single woman on Earth deserves better than that.

But he's allowed to be really overweight? Please tell him to lose weight and see what his reaction is.

Whenever someone says, ‘I don’t usually say LTB….’ all that says to me is that you think any man is better than no man, and you’ll put up with the sort of shit that women with even vague standards would dump a guy for.

Keep it. Good for throwing bag over shoulder with a cheery 'Im off to the gym then' aka go and have a nice couple of hours to yourself chilling out over a coffee, reading a book, sitting listening to music or podcast in your car, whatever. When you get back, tell him how much you're enjoying the gym.

If he's decided you've time to go to the gym you'd be absolutely mad to insist to him that you havent. Are you trying to martyr yourself?

& he's paid £££ so he can't moan about you going can he?

One must never be too hasty. Learn to beat others at their own game

I really don't get this, & it's been suggested a lot on the thread.

Why does OP need to pretend to be going to a gym, in order to leave the house for a couple of hours? & why on EARTH would she spend those house sitting in her car?

It’s a dire state of affairs when sitting in your car is somehow viewed as a treat for women