Anyone just done with life at middle age

[HadEnoughNow1]

Anyone else feel in their forties feel they’ve just had enough of life? I feel it’s all such an effort for such a mediocre life. Constant drudgery and daily grind for the occasional joy such as holidays. If I was told tomorrow I only have 6 months to live I think I’d feel relieved.

And that’s good to hear. But you do understand that not everybody is happy? And that any brief moments of happiness are far outweighed by the sheer effort and stress required to get through all the intervening drudgery?

I know that’s not your life, and that’s a good thing. But surely you can understand that if it was, you might have a different point of view of it all?

Its fantastic you have recovered and made a positive of your situation but we are all different.. respond differently... etc

But unless you ve spent time with the OP and are a MH practitioner .. no one can say "You need this that or the other..."
On a forum, all we can do is sympathise and share our individual stories.

@MrsSkylerWhite Good god no. Knocking 60, life is better than ever.
with respect, you don’t have an age issue but a mental health problem. Please seek professional advice.

I agree with this ^

I'm semi-retired and can work when I want.
If I want to stay in bed until noon and watch Judge Judy these dark mornings I can do.
In the summer I work in my garden and grow veg (and eat it !)
I have time to walk on the beach and chat to dog-owners.
One day a week I work (volunteer) in a charity shop.

I have a cleaner to to the drudgery.

No more periods and feeling like $h!£ one week every month.

I can spend time with like-minded people who lift me up instead of all the miserable tw@ts I used to have to work with.

I've left the rat-race and boy does it feel good.🙂

Yes I did, and yes they did, eventually. Had to take the max dose of citalopram to get there though.

I feel like this too (age 56) I don't bother with mamogram, smears etc as I wouldnt seek treatment anyway.

Currently I just exist, possibly have depression, undiagnosed.
I want to turn things around and enjoy life, but cant seem to get started.

I wouldn't say I'm done with life, but yes, life is not easy and it can be a struggle. I do draw strength from reading this thread and others like it, because it helps to know I'm not alone when I feel this way.

I've heard all the advice that is summed up in that old Carole King song: "You've got to get up every morning, put a smile on your face, and show the world all the love in your heart. Then people are gonna treat you better, you will find, yes you will, that you're beautiful". And I do agree with it, but like others have said, it is so hard to put into action when you're feeling deflated. You feel like, maybe I could do that if someone else would just kickstart the engine first.

I think I’ve just reached a point where I’m not happy but have resigned myself to it. When I was young I was enthusiastic about things, then I spent my 20s and 30s feeling disgruntled that my life wasn’t as good as I wanted it to be. ExH didn’t want kids and by the time I met current OH it was too late, I’ve got odd relationships with my family, few friends, career hasn’t shaped up as well as it could have, I have MH issues and I’ve never really developed a clear sense of self.

I know you only get one chance at life but I’m 42 and now resigned to the fact that I didn’t make a good job of mine and am just marking time really.

The bit about feeling ok in the evening really resonated with me. I am a night owl and could happily stay up till 3am and wake up 11/12. I feel ok in the dead of night when everyone else is asleep. Perhaps it's the lack of guilt of 'making the most of every day' . I wonder if a lot of depressed people are night owls? Certainly 'get up and go' types always seem to be happier and more energetic, and I try to be like that, but fall back into bad habits too easily.

I feel like this. I’m taking Sertraline and HRT, I’ve literally lost the will to live.

God, yes.
I'm 39. I feel like I'm on a hamster wheel. Just work, kids or sodding laundry.

I feel like all the fun bits are done. 20s, wedding, the thought of future kids. My life is about other people.

My periods are starting to get weird and I've got to work harder to keep the weight off despite being very active.

Oh, and I have a late diagnosis of autism, so I've felt different all my life. No support growing up and none in adulthood. Plus a lack of friends and no real prospects of them in the future really. Holidays, alcohol and new clothes are the very brief reprieves.

Walked in everyone's shoes have you?

I'm 40 and feel like this.

I think it's exhaustion. I don't feel like myself anymore or attractive and interested in things, mainly because I don't get much time to myself. The idea of living another 40 years terrifies me. I am going to make myself bail out if I am still alive at 70. I don't own my own house, so I'm just going to be paying my pension to a landlord and will need to keep working for little reward. Fuck that.

I'm not depressed, I just think living is a bit crap and pointless. Nothing makes sense and people are idiotic. Already on hormone replacement, so it's not menopause, just the world we live in is crap. We spend so much time doing basic things to survive that we don't get to live.

I really resonate with this. Yes that are small bits of joy in life but it all seems outweighed by the constant shit. Just what is the point in it all.

It’s proven that they are significantly less effective for mild to moderate depression than other solutions.

Just wanted to add I'm 47 and feeling similar to many on this thread. Even the 'fun' things don't feel that fun to me anymore. We had our work Xmas night out the other night and I would have much rather been at home watching something on Netflix. I don't know whether it's the feeling there are fewer things to look forward to in the future or whether people are unfriendlier in general and life isn't how it felt it used to be or both.

My DH works hard and long hours that so much falls to me. Getting ready for Christmas has felt like an extra part time job these past 6-8 weeks or so....

Nah. Never feel like that. I’m happy with my life.

I felt exactly like this before I went on HRT. Two months later I feel alive again.

Yep, mid 40s, usual grind of caring for my parents who have long term health issues. Same shit, different day. If I was diagnosed with a life ending illness, I'd be thankful.

Can relate to this thread so much. Sometimes I feel like I'm just waiting to die. Warm wishes to everyone feeling like this. Think I need to try either HRT or anti depressants as I just want to hide in bed all day at the moment!

I can't believe so many feel this way. Including those thoughts about being diagnosed with life ending illness, that in some ways it would be a relief. Small comfort knowing others feel like this too.

I'm going to try HRT and see if that changes anything.

to all

Yes. Had have long MH illness for years despite taking several medications. Have a disability(profound hearing loss) and a young son with multiple disabilities. My other kids steer clear of me. I don’t blame them. I wish I could be a candidate for Dignitas. This isn’t just Christmas blues. I’m tired of living.

Agree, op, just turned 45 and feel really flat and down for a year or so, had Dd later at age 40, but life felt exciting and I still felt quite young. Feel like I have zero motivation or nothing to look forward to now and feel stuck also..not sure what’s going on really, not even excited for Christmas but am putting it on for Dd

It gets better - one day you wake up and you have no more fucks to give. It's very liberating & things improve

Yup. Me too.

I'm itching to know what big changes to my life the super positive pp can offer me in order to make the future look brighter?

43. Already tried a myriad of ADs. Probably peri but bloods okay. Full time carer to quite severely handicapped DC and DH working his ass off to keep this shithole of a roof over our heads. No support other than my dear widowed mum who lives an hour away.

Ideas for what fun lies ahead on a postcard, cheers.