Rude wedding invite

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I think 'Thank you but no - I'm afraid we already have plans for a fortnights' time' would do.

But why?? Why not read it as “obviously you are invited” which is what she wrote!!

Because its MN and people love to be offended about weddings.

Maybe it's quite informal and she's just getting her invites out and maybe she kept it breezy due to your baby. Many women don't want to go out with their babies depending on how young they are of course. I wouldn't judge unless there is a backstory.

You already know the answer, as per the title. Rude in every way.

This is what I would do because I'd read it as someone has dropped out. No one invites people to a wedding with two weeks to go unless it's an afterthought.

I'd either read it as "oh shit! I just realised I totally wanted to invite Batfink and I can't believe I forgot!" or that someone else has dropped out and there's now a space for you. I'm feeling charitable today so leaning towards the former.
If you want to go, do so, but don't dwell on how you received the invitation or its wording.

You're an afterthought/fallback OP.

I wouldn't decline it purely on those grounds though. If I was free on the day and could get a babysitter I'd be sorely tempted to revenge eat and drink my own bodyweight at the bride and groom's expense.

The fact that your Mum was invited via a phone call (and a call not even from your cousin) suggests that perhaps she's just being very casual about the whole thing.

Just because it's a church wedding doesn't imply its a huge affair with 500 guests. Wedding and off out for a dinner is what she's said. Done.

I would take it on face value. Either politely accept or politely decline.

sounds like she was told to do it sorry

seeing as your mum was invited straight away it would have been all of you if she really wanted you there in the first place

She was just getting to the point in a simple way because you are a relative and she doesn’t feel she needs to stand on ceremony with you.

She has also possibly had a chaotic haphazard approach as to how many and whom she could invite within confined numbers.

She wouldn’t have risked inviting you if she didn’t want you.

I’d go! But I love a wedding and a party!!

Could this be as a result of a conversation between your parents and your aunt? It sounds like she's been given a nudge.

If a good close relationship did you not think it was weird that you didn’t get invited when your mum did months ago

maybe get your mum to ask your aunt

May be a numbers thing. I didn’t invite cousins I hadn’t seen for years but did the ones close to me

in the end 2w isn’t a long time and maybe You were on b list but does it matter if you are free . Can get a baby sitter and want to go

Seems fine to me, just an informal invitation. If you don't want to go, just don't go.

If you aren't close to her what more do you think you deserve?

If you want to go, go if not don't. The baby is a great excuse at such a young age. I have only ever seen newborn babies who only breastfeed at weddings I've been to unless they're the bride/grooms or in the wedding party so I wouldn't expect them to invite an 18 month old.

I think she's giving you a get out clause so you don't feel terrible if you don't go.

It's fine. She's just being considerate that you might not come because if the baby.

I was so laidback about my wedding. I would have sent similar

Dont overthink it. Most peoples weddings are bound by numbers so its completely normal to have people drop out and then have others invited. Doesnt mean you werent wanted.

If you want to go then respond happily. " id love to come. Is it childfree, do i need a babysitter or are we all invited"
Or if you dont, just say its too short notice and you hope she has a fantastic day

This is not how wedding planning works.

You get engaged, you find somewhere you like with a budget because places you can have a wedding book years in advance . They tell you how many guests you can afford on that budget.
You send out invites with RSVP’s. Some respond, some hedge their bets. You have no idea who is coming or how much it will cost.

Yes you do know who’s coming unless you’re friends with massively rude people.

Maybe you were close as kids. But you aren't as adults
Which is fine
She probably just invited you as someone else has pulled out.
And she refers to your child as a baby because she dont want you to bring the child....

I don’t think the invite is rude, just a bit blunt.
I think there are two options here,

1. you’re filling a space for someone who dropped out
   
2. she genuinely thought you wouldn’t go because of the baby. Someone told her she was wrong (your mum possibly), so then invited you because she wants you there.
   
3. she doesn’t like fuss and doesn’t want to burden people with feeling like they have to come to the wedding, especially if she doesn’t talk to them frequently. That’s why she implied you don’t have to go.