AIBU for wanting to double-barrel babies surname?

[ekkn]

First baby, we aren't married but are engaged but realise that we won't be getting married for a long long time.

Things are also quite tense at the moment in the relationship, lots of arguments etc.

AIBU for suggesting we double barrel the babies name? I really don't want to have a completely different name to my child. But know that if we ever do get married it will not be for years and years to come, if we make it that far!

Also meant to add. He says if i do double barrel the name, he will never forgive me.

I'd give the baby your name and leave him off the birth certificate if he's being a dick.

I wouldnt give a baby a man's surname if we were rowing lots and unmarried.

Give the baby your last name. If you marry you can change it to all have the same name. Traditionally the baby always took mother's surname, so keep to tradition, just in case he tries that tactic.

@JSL52

I'd give the baby your name and leave him off the birth certificate if he's being a dick.

Yes, do this.

Give baby your name

Name change fail there I think, if you report it to MNHQ they can retroactively fix it for you.

YABU, give the baby your name

@PigeonLittle

I wouldnt give a baby a man's surname if we were rowing lots and unmarried.

This. It doesn’t sound as if the relationship has a future.

Just give him your name, OP.

We're married. I kept my maiden name. Double barrelled DD's surname. As far as I'm concerned, I baked her and delivered her - I'm getting a part of her name.

If he won't "forgive" you for double barrelling a name... Well, he definitely won't forgive you when you rightly show him the door. Manchild.

It’s traditional to give the baby Mum’s surname. I would stick with that. You can alway change your child’s surname later or your partner can change his.

@JSL52

I'd give the baby your name and leave him off the birth certificate if he's being a dick.

If not on birth certificate, I believe the father has no parental responsibilities and rights, but may not be obliged to pay child support. Worth investigating

OP, your baby's surname is the least of your worries. I'd suggest you think very carefully whether to stay in this relationship and if you do, whether it's better to marry or not

I’ve said YABU because I’d give the baby my surname in this situation.

You’re not happy and not likely to get married soon. In reality are you likely to ever get married?

I’d give them my name and that’s that.

If not on birth certificate, I believe the father has no parental responsibilities and rights, but may not be obliged to pay child support. Worth investigating

Entirely untrue.

Either give the baby your surname/family name or double barrel but no way in hell would I only use the fathers family name.
Especially when regularly arguing & unmarried.

Give them your surname then and you can change it if you get married. He sounds like a petty man child.

@ekkn

Also meant to add. He says if i do double barrel the name, he will never forgive me.

That's easy then. Baby gets your surname. Next.

@ekkn

Also meant to add. He says if i do double barrel the name, he will never forgive me.

Give baby your name and dump him

@JSL52

I'd give the baby your name and leave him off the birth certificate if he's being a dick.

What a stupid suggestion

You can give the baby your surname/double barrel surname. If the father is named on the birth certificate and you subsequently get married you have to re-register your baby and you can decide to give the baby the fathers name at this point (assuming that you'd want to do this as you were taking the name as well. Apparently this is the only time that it is allowed. I know this as I have just registered my baby and the registrar told us this.

You need to know the legal ins and outs of being married or not and recognising a father on a birth certificate.

Personally I don't like double barrelled names, mine have my second name as a middle name.

Don't go down the road of part time or sahm without understanding what you'd be left with if you break up further down the road whether married or unmarried.

@ekkn

Also meant to add. He says if i do double barrel the name, he will never forgive me.

Don't double barrel then, just give the baby your name.

Seriously he sounds like a complete twat, no way would my baby be getting his surname.

I am married but didn't change my name.

I think it would be a huge mistake to marry him.

Definitely your name and keep off birth certificate as he has no parental responsibility then.

If you marry the you try register the birth and presumably change the surname then.

I would give him your name.

Interesting that he cares so very, very much about the baby having the same name as him but doesn’t care that you don’t have the same name. How selfish.