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AIBU?

To think rubbing your genitals in someone's face I assault, whatever their age?

223 replies

MargeSimpson00 · 19/05/2021 16:07

Ds got in trouble today after a scuffle. Nothing to serious, no one was hurt just some tripping/shoving. Teacher dealt with it, is keeping both boys in tomorrow as punishment. All not an issue. Ds was pretty upset when he got home and it turns out the reason he retaliated was because when he was on the floor after being tripped, the other boy 'teabagged' him. Rest of the class circled and laughed, obviously causing a lot of embarrassment to ds.

So although I'm fine with the punishment, aibu to speak to the teacher about this? I don't think it's something to brush under the carpet tbh and think it need addressing.

OP posts:

Am I being unreasonable?

AIBU

You have one vote. All votes are anonymous.

HappyMeal654 · 19/05/2021 16:11

Definitely not unreasonable, hope your boy is ok

PurpleDaisies · 19/05/2021 16:13

Definitely talk to the teacher. How old are they?

Goatsgetmygoat · 19/05/2021 16:14

Sexual assault. Must be dealt with and sends a strong message to boys of that age that is behaviour is not right

MargeSimpson00 · 19/05/2021 16:14

I've emailed the teacher to request a call back. They're 10.

OP posts:
Shitfuckcommaetc · 19/05/2021 16:16

The other boy actually pulled down his trousers and put his genitals into your sons face?

NewMatress · 19/05/2021 16:17

At 10 that definitely needs to be followed up.

Herewegoagainok · 19/05/2021 16:18

Definitely speak to teacher Very strange the other boy knew the phrase teabagging too

HandsOffMyRights · 19/05/2021 16:20

This is alarming. Hope your son's OK and that the school takes this very seriously.

Musntgrumble2021 · 19/05/2021 16:20

They are young and learning so important not to label them as a sex pest when they are still developing. It is very worrying to think about how the other lad learned about ‘teabagging’ and how he’s come to think it’s ok. He definitely needs to learn just how unacceptable what he did was and be supported to learn about boundaries and a safeguarding referral might be warranted depending on where he says he learned that from.

I hope your DS is ok. What an awful thing to happen. Most importantly he will need support to process this and know it’s not his fault and shouldn’t have happened. I hope the school handle it well and help your DS to feel that there is some justice and some restoration and that he can feel safe that this won’t happen again.

Notapheasantplucker · 19/05/2021 16:21

Fucking hell, definitely not ok.

Aquamarine1029 · 19/05/2021 16:23

That teabagging bullshit needs to be addressed immediately, and your son's teacher needs to be aware how serious this is. Do not back down on this even an inch.

StopSayingDueDiligence · 19/05/2021 16:25

What else is concerning is that the 10 year olds know what 'tea bagging' is...

NewMatress · 19/05/2021 16:25

I think lots of 10yos would know the word, they wouldn't understand its full meaning but it's a playground word IME.

In any case the behaviour needs dealing with, as does the response of the other children present.

BrilliantBetty · 19/05/2021 16:25

Telling the school was right. The boy is only ten and it's crucial they find out where he got this from.. has it happened to him, and make is abundantly clear it is not acceptable behaviour.

He's young and learning.

Your poor son, too. He too needs to see that this behaviour is taken seriously and is unacceptable.

Notcontent · 19/05/2021 16:26

A 10 year old did that??? If so, then this is serious.

Twinkie01 · 19/05/2021 16:26

It's sexual assault not just assault.

EveningOverRooftops · 19/05/2021 16:27

@Herewegoagainok

Definitely speak to teacher Very strange the other boy knew the phrase teabagging too

10yos knowing the term isn’t usual given it’s a taunt a lot of gamers do.

They clearly have picked it up via gaming more than anything insidious.

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.thegamer.com/teabagging-video-games/amp/

However, taking it from a game to real life IS a problem as it is assault but also part of bullying giving it’s a known taunt.
jaffacakefan · 19/05/2021 16:28

Contact the school dsl, not just the teacher. This is peer on peer sexual assault and a safeguarding issue which they will have procedures to follow.
Hope your son is ok

ScottCheggs · 19/05/2021 16:28

Teabagging now has moved from a sexual move to a gaming one. Not dismissing the bullying and humiliation but I doubt he had bare testicles in his face

Rosebel · 19/05/2021 16:29

It doesn't sound like a minor scuffle even without the teabaging. I mean the other boy had your son on the floor and was obviously able to overpower and assault him.
So yes I'd be raising all of the incident because it doesn't actually sound like a fight more like bullying.

mamatocaptainchaos · 19/05/2021 16:30

Horrid :( can't imagine that!

AutoIncorrect · 19/05/2021 16:31

This needs to be escalated to the SG lead. That’s very worrying behaviour for a 10 year old, hope your DS is ok.

NewMatress · 19/05/2021 16:34

OP, did DS tell you he was "teabagged" or did he tell you exactly what happened? What you think teabagging is and what a bunch of 10yos think it is, is not necessarily the same thing.

BetterThanKleenex · 19/05/2021 16:35

YANBU. Speak to both teacher and headteacher. Is there a pastoral care provider at his school? Get them involved too. And the school's designated safeguarding leader (DSL). This is sexual assault and the child who did it clearly needs help too.

Thatisnotwhatisaid · 19/05/2021 16:38

Not that this would ever be ok but when you mentioned teabagging I assumed they were mid teens. A 10 year old shouldn’t know what that means, I’d be most concerned about their behaviour in general at that sort of age (perhaps they’re being sexually abused for example). This definitely needs following up and the teachers need to speak to his parents.

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