to be annoyed at DH for this?

[AngryLittleMummy]

I am furious. Earlier on DD (2) was messing about with the remote controls (we have 3, one for tv, DVD, sky remote) anyway, he managed to turn on the dvd player and on came a bloody blue movie, I was horrified. OK I know DH watches it now and again (never when I or the kids are around thats for sure) and it doesn't really bother me BUT to leave it carelessly in the player is downright stupid. He could have at least hidden it. He gets this DVDs from his pervo mates at work.

Can you imagine if my parents or his parents were there when this happened or worse still a visitor? Could have been a health visitor checking the little one.

I am currently not speaking to him for this and threw his dvd in the bin (cracked it in half first and its not even his) ha ha.

AIBU?

Oh, and no, i wouldn't mind telling you what I watch, but I woud want everyone reading this thread to tell me they want to know too so I dont cause any offence

themildmanneredjanitor - not EVERYBODY has jumped on the OP and saying her DH is in the right!

If I was to say I really like dominatrix porn would I be ok?? I mean I really enjoy watching a femme fatale whipping a man dressed in a gimp outfit, whilst making him beg for mercy.
Is it okay for men to be degraded??? Or d you think that maybe they ENJOY it, like some of these women do!

Pornography is the degradation of vulnerable abused women. I did assume that Victorian Squalor was into porn given that she was doing such a stand-up job of defending it.

To be honest I think if there are any "hang-ups" here, it's more about people trying to maintain their denial about what porn is actually like and the experience of porn performers (which isn't good).

Anyhow I've started another thread so as not to hijack this one.

"why are you so understanding of her dh making a mistake and not of the op losing her rag???????"

If I was taking a wild guess it would be because of sexism.

TMMJ - her dh made a mistake, I doubt that he would want their dd to see the dvd anymore than ALM would, I'm guessing that he is remorseful about what he did wrong. ALM however is not even willing to accept she shouldn't have destroyed someone's property.

Arghhh elizabetth, I am defending it because it is not all about women being degraded, have you actually seen every type of porn out there??? I have a friend who works as a dominatrix, and absolutely tears men apart, for payment, because they like it!! Just because you don't like to have sex on video or find doing these things degrading doesnt mean everyone does.

themildmanneredjanitor - yes, her DH made a mistake, nobody is denying that.

However there are BETTER ways the OP could have dealt with it.

I think I'd have broken it too if I'd have been in the OP's place.
I'm not saying it's a grown up response just entirely normal!

TMMJ - i'm not understanding of him leaving the film where he did. IN THE SAME WAY i'm not understanding of her breaking the DVD.

If it were my DH (Honestly now) I'd have removed DVD and yelled at him. I'd have probably thrown something at him as wel. A cushion or something. If I'd have known the DVD was his I probably would have thrown it in the bin.

BUT SHE KNEW IT WASN'T HIS. THIS IS WHAT IS ANNOYING.

LOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOL @ elizabeth.

what else can I say,

Off to spend some time with me DH now, maybe we'll dig out the porn for later

tmmj - I an not understandng of DH making a mistake - i think everyone is feeling that the reaction was ott. that is what OP will be left to explain to DH. He is not going to understand why she broke something that was not his regardless of what he did.

OP - you know nothing about the people acting on these films at all. are you jealous that your husband gets turned on by watching them - maybe even prefers it! you sound like a jealous wife whose angry because your husband wouldnt stop watching porn when you asked him. well hey you've got your reason for him to stop now.

are you sure its not your hubbie whose the dealer!

Totally agree Janitor, this thread has gone off in a weird direction, people seem so bothered about op breaking a piddling dvd. Weird.

Read this VS, then tell me what you think -

mwcnews.net/content/view/3286/26/

refuse to read the article because it is titled "what MEN can do about it"

You assume that all men who watch porn are perverts, and all women who watch it must be submissive to watch something so awful.

the issue is OP breaking the DVD because it was not justified. that is exactly the way DH will see it therefore it WILL become another problem, for OP the issue will be why dd you break the DVD its not mine, it totaly takes away any leg she had to stand on. DH will NOT understand !

the issue is OP breaking the DVD because it was not justified. that is exactly the way DH will see it therefore it WILL become another problem, for OP the issue will be why dd you break the DVD its not mine, it totaly takes away any leg she had to stand on. DH will NOT understand !

There is no comparison between the two "crimes". It's not as if it was an original piece of Victoriana porn, it's a worthless downloaded piece of crap. So she broke it, the issue is to do with him and porn.

homerton, it was worthless to her...it wasn't worthless to the man it belonged to.

Thanks very much for the porn recommendations on that link Elizabetth....

homerton i agree, but, by breaking the dvd she has taken it a step further and DH will defend himself because the action was not justified. all he will think about will be how do i explain this one to my mates ! she will not be able to express to him how she feels about his watching porn.

YABU

Elizabetth, I still feel the same.

It even shows you an exchange in which the woman was enjoying it!!

FWIW, although I do not watch porn, I quite like submissive sex, me being the submissive one, I also like DP to get rough with me, but it was ME asking him to do this NOT him forcing me to!!!

Is that him degrading me???? Or me being a woman who knows what she wants and is comfortable in her relationship to know it won't cross lines I don't want it to???

Norma, I'm sure he has plenty more from where that came from.