Kids peeing in public AIBU

[yasmin0147]

Just wondering If I was being unreasonable or not, bit of back story, when I am waiting outside the preschool pretty much every morning, a child needs the loo and the mums let their boys pee behind the bins (that we all stand next to in line before the kids go in) this is making me really angry for some reason, I won’t let my son do this at all, and make him wait.
Am I being unreasonable?
How I see it is you wouldn’t be allowed to pee like that as an adult and it’s a bad habit to teach your kids.
Imagine them doing that when they are a bit older, they could get into trouble.

YABA- they are kids, get over it

YANBA- it’s a bad thing to teach your kids because they aren’t actually allowed to do that when they get older.

An occasional one off is fine (for children and for adults) but the fact that it is a regular occurrence with the kids queuing up makes it wrong.

Maybe a couple of times a term the odd child might need to. But not lots of them every day.

Behind the bins is a bit grim but my son took a looong time to be reliably dry and I did have to allow Al fresco wees in parks or woods. He couldn't just wait. He wasn't dry at night til 11. My dd was absolutely fine, pretty much trained herself so it was never necessary. Please remember that not all kids develop at the same rate and can't all just do what your child can.

Have you ever left your house? Men pee behind wheelie bins, against walls etc etc all the time.

I have frequently peed behind bushes and walls when I cannot find a loo.

Needs must and all that.

I don't love it, but I will admit these days I often have to let my 3yo wee at the park. He's not old enough to hold it long, and due to covid all the public toilets are closed

Oh good this has reminded me of Ds2 on his first day at school. It was a fifteen minute walk home, through the woods. He desperately needed a wee so I let him go deeper in to the trees. He was ages.

When I caught up to him, he was having a poo

We never did that again.

It depends on the age of the child imo and how long they've been toilet training.

No it's not ideal, and I definitely wouldn't be making a habit of it BUT sometimes when the kids has to go they need to go there and then. Not everyone has the ability to hold it in, with that said I'd chap the door or find somewhere more private.

Not something I could get worked up about.

It depends on circumstances. At preschool age these kids could have just been potty trained and therefore not have control yet. Therefore the 10 minute wait for them to get into the building and get there shoes off and get to a bathroom ect may be too long and would result in an accident. I know many a parent who have little portapitty things for their kids at this age.

I let DSS pee in a Bush at the park once. To be honest how is it that much different to a dog peeing in the same Bush. DSS is now 9 and has not done this in at least 5 years if not longer.

My son is terrible and is not very good at holding on, I get him to pee in a plastic bottle and then pour in down the drain if not out in the country.

Surely she should knock the door and ask for the kids to go in for a wee?

Unfortunately lots of public toilets have been closed due to councils wanting to save money.

If the alternative is an accident, then no it’s not unreasonable.

Otherwise it’s grim.

One off fine otherwise they should have a travel potty if they not reliably dry

Behind bins or on concrete isn’t idea as people will smell it.

Behind a tree or otherwise on the grass/ mud etc is ok. I mean even I’ll pee behind a tree on a long walk!

That frequently -YANBU
At a preschool- YANBU

Now and then outdoors, fine. No different to dogs.

I would say YANBU as it seems to be something of a routine - if it was a one off or occasional it would not be ab issue.

I can’t get too worked up about an alfresco wee. If you’re out in the country with no other options a wee behind a tree isn’t going to harm anyone. I wouldn’t like what you’re describing though. I almost seems to have become the routine to wee behind the bins. I can’t imagine many of the children live that far away from the pre school so it feels like a habit rather than need as they should have gone to the loo before leaving the house.

I can see the op has been around a while. However, pee threads encourage the worse sort of pervs on here (especially with children as the subject), just a reminder....

Outside school is grim.it must stink, especially when its warm.

Behind a Bush or in a ditch when on a long country walk is fine, especially now a lot of public conveniences are closed. Adults or children

Increasingly i see where there are public loos, the ones you pay to use, several will be out of use at any given time, resulting in huge queues. Maybe it reduces cleaning for the companies? I actually think paying is reasonable, but they need to be actually operational. Otherwise i would rather the old mildewed blocks of grim stainless steel toilets and no loo roll. At least there would be somewhere to actually go.

My son just can't wait. I do let him wee in parks and things, although I don't love it it's better than him having soggy pants. I think it's cruel to let a child wet themselves if they've made the effort to tell you they need to go. They only have tiny bladders.

@Upamountain43

Have you ever left your house? Men pee behind wheelie bins, against walls etc etc all the time.

I have frequently peed behind bushes and walls when I cannot find a loo.

Needs must and all that.

Frequently? I am 57 and have never had to do this frequently in my adult life.

Yanbu
It’s pretty disgusting

It does seem a bit off that it's happening so regularly and more than one child.

Maybe have a word with the pre-school about making toilets available while children are waiting? As they may not know this is happening.

* I have frequently peed behind bushes and walls when I cannot find a loo.*

I have never done this. Ever.

... pretty much every morning, a child needs the loo and the mums let their boys pee behind the bins (that we all stand next to in line before the kids go in)

No. That's not on. If there's a genuine issue with their toilet training the answer is NOT to let them piss behind the bins every bloomin' day.

It's grim and piss stinks. There's a reason why men who get caught pissing up walls and in public on night's out can then get fined. Yes, dogs also piss against walls, but as they are animals they can hardly be expected to use a public toilet instead 🙄 It's also noticeable there seems to be a different standard held to little girls vs boys 'having a quick wee outside'? I noted a mum encouraging her 8/9yr old son to piss against someone's fence (actually on their back gate) the other week when I was parked up.

It seems a bit off if it’s happening all the time; is it the same kids? If i get my 3 year old to go before we go out then we’ve got at least an hour (usually a lot more but she has a better bladder than me) before she’d desperately need to go again.

@Upamountain43 I’ve only ever seen drunk men peeing in public (usually late at night); I wouldn’t say all the time.

Do you have a dog? Dogs wee and poo everywhere all the time. Even when poo is picked up it still leaves a residue.

Small children can't just hold it it's not possible. Anything that helps mums get out and about with their kids should be OK. We wonder why people feel stuck inside!