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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Who should pay?!

288 replies

Boatymcboatofftheboat · 25/04/2020 21:17

The specifics of this are incredibly outing so changing a few of the details (hopefully it still makes sense! Please bear with me):

My friend has a boat she can no longer afford. I am interested in her boat, but not 100% sure I need one at this time. We had an agreement before lockdown that I would have 100% ownership of the boat for a trial period of 2 months (all of April and May). I would pay costs totalling 350£ a month for this period. In exchange I would have 100% use of the boat and my friend would not use it at all. Because of lockdown I am not able to use the boat, but I agreed to pay before this and a deal is a deal/I value my friendship so have paid for April and planned to pay for May. However my friend has mentioned several times that she has been using the boat during April.

DH thinks I would be crazy to pay for May as agreed since I have not used it and actually friend is using it which breaks our agreement/essentially means I am paying for her to use her own boat.

I am in two minds as I value her a friend and don’t want to be petty, and lockdown is not her fault obviously - but equally I’ve paid one month and I am rankled she has been using it.

YABU - pay for May as agreed
YANBU - you paid for one month already and that’s enough/don’t be a mug

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
newbiefrugalgal · 26/04/2020 13:51

Glad it seems resolved OP.

Original poster
Boatymcboatofftheboat · 26/04/2020 13:53

Reminds me of when I was 10 and I talked my brother into paying me for the privilege of cleaning my budgie out

At the risk of introducing another animal into this mess any further, I would be very interested to know how this was achieved!

OP posts:
NoProblem123 · 26/04/2020 14:04

He was very fond of budgie and I was sick of cleaning up its feathery mess - for a small fee he loaned it off me !

Secretlifeofme · 26/04/2020 14:11

Panda horse do do do do do do
Panda horse do do do do do do
Panda horse do do do do do do
Panda horse

Dragon horse do do do do do do
Dragon horse do do do do do so
Dragon horse do do do do do do
Dragon horse

Original poster
Boatymcboatofftheboat · 26/04/2020 14:12

@secretlifeofme

Aahhh, just what every thread needs - a theme song!

@NoProblem123

Well, well done I suppose! 😁

OP posts:
thejollygargler · 26/04/2020 14:25

@Secretlifeofme

I properly HATE you Grin
Mind you, I suppose it is an improvement on Clair!

BackseatCookers · 26/04/2020 14:54

Try to time pregnancies?!

JKScot4 · 26/04/2020 15:13

@NoProblem123
excavate? what?the panda? the horse?
🤣🤣🤣🚜⛵️🐎

NoProblem123 · 26/04/2020 15:36

@Secretlifeofme extricate !!
stupid phone 😁

Original poster
Boatymcboatofftheboat · 26/04/2020 15:50

@NoProblem123

I could try to excavate myself but I wouldn’t know where to start

OP posts:
BrassyLocks · 26/04/2020 16:50

£350 would be very cheap for a boat too Shock

Original poster
Boatymcboatofftheboat · 26/04/2020 16:55

@brassylocks

Really? What’s the monthly cost for a boat - like the mooring and whatnot

OP posts:
MrsElijahMikaelson1 · 26/04/2020 22:13

Fuck me am now so confused!

Original poster
Boatymcboatofftheboat · 27/04/2020 15:43

@MrsElijahMikaelson1

What’s confusing?

OP posts:
WiddlinDiddlin · 27/04/2020 15:58

Who is confused?

It was obviously a horse, sorry OP you have to try harder than that to pull the panda-wool over the horsey peoples eyes on here!

I think leaving April as is, not pay for May... and mm, tread carefully with friend I don't think she is quite as lovely as previously assumed, because if she were she'd have refunded some or all of April, and told you to not worry about May and either forget the trial altogether as she was no longer sure on sale of panda, or postpone it.

The fact she'd happily let you pay for a trial you can't use, for a giraffe she's not certain she wants to sell, does rather put her loveliness into question!

Original poster
Boatymcboatofftheboat · 27/04/2020 16:06

HOW DID PEOPLE KNOW IT WAS A HORSE?!? HOW?!?

(Even though we know now it’s not really a horse at all)

OP posts:
WiddlinDiddlin · 27/04/2020 16:55

LWVTB is pretty common particularly between friends...

Asides from a boat, I can't think of anything that would have ongoing maintainance costs, but not be usable as not at your house..

ERGO... GIRAFFEHORSEPANDA innit!

KillerofMen · 27/04/2020 17:08

Guessed it was a horse straight away. It's Mumsnet, it's always a horse.

Original poster
Boatymcboatofftheboat · 27/04/2020 18:15

It's Mumsnet, it's always a horse

That’s not fair: sometimes it’s a panda.

OP posts:
TrickyKid · 27/04/2020 18:20

I think the deal should've been postponed until after lock down. She needs to pay for all costs until you can actually trial run the boat/car/horse.

LannieDuck · 27/04/2020 18:46

It could have been a bicycle....

Original poster
Boatymcboatofftheboat · 27/04/2020 19:00

@lannieduck

This is perhaps the least believable suggestion on the entire thread! What sort of monthly costs are associated with a bicycle? And if I’d changed the figures downwards to fit eg 35£ a month, people would have wondered what the problem was just sucking it up and paying.

Come on Lannie, come on. 😆

OP posts:
copycopypaste · 27/04/2020 19:11

It's a difficult one. I have a friend who owns and makes a living from specialised horses.

She runs a loan scheme during winter, where she loans out the horses during winter to keep her costs down, but the people who she has the agreement with, take the horses away from the yard and keep them at their own yards and obviously have the necessary costs. Had you done this with your friends horse, then you'd still incur the costs. However your friend would not be able to use the horse under any circumstances.

I think your friend is being a bit of a cheeky fucker by taking your money and using the horse anyway. I understand horses need exercise and it's good practice to ride them often, in your friends shoes I'd have offered to go 50/50 (even the I think she's taking the piss).

But if it had been an agreement via stables (as per my friend), you'd still be paying.

Another good reason why you shouldn't ever buy or sell stuff with friends or family

Thelnebriati · 27/04/2020 19:49

I think she's being a cheeky mare.

carly2803 · 27/04/2020 20:25

do not pay may

its a horse, you are paying its livery and she gets a livery holidy?!

god no!!