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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Friend saying her (huge) bum is small

338 replies

h3av3n · 09/04/2020 19:13

AIBU to be getting irritated with this and be baffled? She is always saying this to me even though it's HUGE and mine is definitely smaller as she can see... and people always tell her it's big so surely she knows? But she will talk about how it's not big and she needs to start growing it etc (weight training) even though she literally gets comments on it on a regular basis. On one hand maybe she literally can't see how big it is, a lot of women are very critical of their bodies... but to actually say it's small and not big even though she's constantly getting comments on it?!
By the way this isn't a jealousy issue, it just baffles me why she is always saying this to me even though people always say it's big... also the fact mine is definitely smaller but she calls hers small and not big directly to me

OP posts:
Cheeryandmerry · 09/04/2020 19:23

You sound obsessed! She’s a friend, right? Well my friend swears blind she has not a bit of cellulite....I just nod and smile and ignore the ripples on the back of her legs because she’s a lovely person and it’s not like me mentioning it will make it go away!

HoffiCoffi13 · 09/04/2020 19:23

I’m not sure how I’d feel if I got lots of comments about having a big bum Confused

Waxonwaxoff0 · 09/04/2020 19:24

Having a big bum is the desirable thing for young women now. Made popular by the Kardashians.

TitianaTitsling · 09/04/2020 19:24

Any other 90s teens who remembers the advise from J-17 or was it Mizz to tie a checked shirt around your waist to detract from a 'big bum'. "Does my bum look big in this?"....

slipperywhensparticus · 09/04/2020 19:25

Is that you Kim?

squirrelsbizaar · 09/04/2020 19:25

I think having a large arse is desirable these days, like huge boobs where when I was growing up.
I would just stare at her arse, look a bit sad for her, then change the subject. That should shut her up.

Original poster
h3av3n · 09/04/2020 19:25

'Who is making the comments' men are making the comments, she gets complimented on it on a regular basis

OP posts:
HoffiCoffi13 · 09/04/2020 19:26

I didn’t think I was that old at 35, but this post has made me realise I’m completely and utterly past it!

Original poster
h3av3n · 09/04/2020 19:27

"How is it the same?! Is having a big bum the thing people are aiming for now?"

Whaaat? It has been considered attractive in the mainstream to have a big bum for years now

OP posts:
goldenorbspider · 09/04/2020 19:27

What a bummer

EveryDayIsADuvetDay · 09/04/2020 19:27

Reminds me of my Mother - she was forever claiming that she had long legs and a very long body (in relation to clothes not fitting).
She was 5'2".

HoffiCoffi13 · 09/04/2020 19:28

Whaaat? It has been considered attractive in the mainstream to have a big bum for years now

It really isn’t something that’s mentioned in the type of media that I read.

Rose789 · 09/04/2020 19:29

I have never felt more elderly in my life readying this Biscuit

CrazyTimesAreOccurring · 09/04/2020 19:29

Very odd, is it just you she compares hers with?

mummyhammy · 09/04/2020 19:29

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Cheeryandmerry · 09/04/2020 19:30

I think it’s desirable to have a big arse, but in combination with a teeny tiny waist. Unfortunately while I have a big butt (and I cannot lie) it is rather square and flat, and topped off by a pretty square body shape Grin.

RaininSummer · 09/04/2020 19:30

Weird thread, weird friend but if she wants tips on growing her bum I can help as been doing that for years. She will need a sofa and regular cake.

raspberryk · 09/04/2020 19:30

Well my friend swears blind she has not a bit of cellulite....I just nod and smile and ignore the ripples on the back of her legs because she’s a lovely person and it’s not like me mentioning it will make it go away!

I'm your friend, I probably have cellulite but since I've never seen the back of my legs as far as I'm concerned I don't have any Grin

As for the OP, I can't quite understand what's going on.

mummyhammy · 09/04/2020 19:30

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Heismyopendoor · 09/04/2020 19:30

Seems like the weirdest thing ever for you to be concerned about

Original poster
h3av3n · 09/04/2020 19:31

Just to clear things up, yes a big bum is considered attractive and a good thing and has been for quite a few years now and the comments from people are comments/compliments from men (I know it's gross)

OP posts:
scrivette · 09/04/2020 19:31

'Does my bum look big in this?' Has a whole new meaning now!

Skittlesss · 09/04/2020 19:32

What an arse!

Rebelwithallthecause · 09/04/2020 19:33

I thought it was more fashionable/ desirable to have a large bottom now so maybe she thinks she’s putting herself down by saying hers is small. Especially if she is making an effort in increasing it

SallyWD · 09/04/2020 19:33

Why are people always telling her it's big?! How bizarre. I'm a pear shape with a very big bum and I can't remember a single time when someone's told me I have a big bum! Her friends are very rude. I. Imagine she's saying it's not so big in a defensive way.