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Can't believe I'm even posting this. Christmas dinner highchair'gate'

831 replies

Nobhobs · 29/11/2019 11:49

Spending Christmas with DH, DS and the in laws. We're weaning DS so mentioned in passing bringing his high chair so he can sit with us during Christmas dinner (if he's not napping or anything like that) he's very alert and active and gets arsey if not being entertained. He loves being in his high chair and round the table and it's his first Christmas so we're a bit excited (yes I know he worn remember it)

MIL has said we can't bring his highchair, as her other sons baby will only be 8 weeks old and can't sit in one and we can't leave out one of the babies on Christmas Day. I laughed thinking it was a bad joke, but no, deadly serious.

We sort of ignored and thought we'd deal with it on the day, but had a text from 8 week olds mum saying that MIL had told her we were going to try and leave her child out and that she's not happy about it. Her baby will be the only one not in the Christmas dinner photos if we bring our highchair Hmm I said well obviously baby can be held up in the photos if that's what's upsetting you, DS is at the age where he doesn't just nap constantly and wants to be involved and entertained and it's nothing to do with leaving her child out.

It's totally ridiculous and DH is now saying just to leave the highchair at home to avoid drama. I've never had any issues with the in laws before and I'm mind blown by how stupid this is. Or am I BU? Is this a thing?! If one babies on the floor they all have to be?? Hmm

OP posts:
GruciusMalfoy · 29/11/2019 12:10

It sounds like they're a collection of loons. Of course your baby needs a seat, and an 8 week old obviously doesn't. I'd tell them not to worry about it, we'll have Christmas dinner at home to avoid upsetting the 8 week old infant Hmm

Janaih · 29/11/2019 12:11

unbelievable! how can people come out with tripe like this with a straight face?

Wakingupnow · 29/11/2019 12:11

If your GP wants to keep the peace, will your DH entertain your DS during dinner or let me guess, will this fall to you? Don't let them off with it OP.

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 29/11/2019 12:11

They are all bonkers, especially the Mum of the 8-week old.

Stay home and have a lovely first Christmas together.

GruciusMalfoy · 29/11/2019 12:11

I presume the 8 week old is your DH’s sister’s baby? I wonder if this is the start of golden grandchild syndrome - hope not for your sake.

This was my thought too. Utterly ridiculous.

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 29/11/2019 12:12

jesus they sound like hard work...WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Promise to pick him up and kick the high chair out of the picture come the time....bloody loons

MsJaneAusten · 29/11/2019 12:12

How old is your DS?

I’d reply saying “are you seriously asking is not to feed our child in case an eight week old feels left out?”

OverthinkingThis · 29/11/2019 12:12

WTAF - surely the 8 weeker can sit on someone's lap for the photos?? Or both the babies can sit on laps, then after the pics are done yours goes in the high chair to eat?

My MIL is making 23 month old DS sit in a high chair for Xmas dinner as there isn't enough space/chairs round the dinner table. He's been in a booster chair up at the main table at home for months, he's going to do his nut at being crammed into a high chair in the corner especially as she's timed the meal for the middle of his nap time But I did warn MIL Grin

Liverbird77 · 29/11/2019 12:12

No fucking way would I spend Christmas dinner with my baby on my lap, trying to feed him. What a nightmare.
I would stay at home with my child, with or without my husband!

Wakingupnow · 29/11/2019 12:12

Bloody autocorrect if your DH wants to keep the peace

messolini9 · 29/11/2019 12:14

Batshit, the pair of them. (MiL & SiL)

But that's not your problem, is it?
Your problem is DH is now saying just to leave the highchair at home to avoid drama - thereby enabling their controlling idiocy.

Your DS will be miserable without his high chair, & it's only reasonable & sane to want to include him in the fun at table.
The 8-week old, however ... ffs.

People who are more concerned with how the photos will look than enjoying the actual day are invariably pains in the arse though.

DH needs to talk some common sense into his mum.
Will he though? - he obviously prefers just giving in to the crazy for a quiet life. Its obviously more important to him to comply with his daft mother & DS (SiL?) than see his son having a happy time at the table with all of you.
That would piss me off most about the whole nonsense.

MegaClutterSlut · 29/11/2019 12:14

If people gossiped like that behind my back I wouldn't go. Its total batshit and your mil is a shit stirrer.

MsPepperPotts · 29/11/2019 12:14

Why would you eve dream of spending Christmas Day with these crazy uptight people.
Stay at home and enjoy the peace and quiet.

LakieLady · 29/11/2019 12:15

That's so mad I think your MIL might be sectionable!

Definitely nip this shite in the bud and get your DH on board, or you'll be dancing to this tune for the rest of MIL's life.

High chair or stay home, I think is the way to go. And if you stay home, send them lots of pics of your gorgeous toddler in his lovely high chair and your picture-perfect Christmas meal.

MissBPotter · 29/11/2019 12:15

Wow this is one of the silliest things I have ever read, I feel for you op! Of course you need a high chair. My two loved chomping on bits of the Xmas dinner and would have been no fun at all having them on our laps. Why are they favouring SIL’s baby so much? I would say something like (through DH), ‘it’s such a shame you are not willing to accommodate DS needs at Christmas meaning that we can no longer attend. Let’s try to arrange another time to see each other over the festive period when you come to us, so DS is able to eat comfortably.’

angieloumc · 29/11/2019 12:15

I'd stay at home OP, don't let IL's set this ridiculous precedent.

RollOnNextYear · 29/11/2019 12:17

Stay at home.
Where's your weaning ds supposed to sit and eat.
Theyre bonkers

User342109097569098 · 29/11/2019 12:17

Are you having dinner with the cast of one flew over the cuckoos nest? That is nuts! Seriously nuts.

messolini9 · 29/11/2019 12:17

This could be the tip of a very stupid iceberg.

@FredaFrogspawn actual guffawing at this, what a cracking phrase.
Nicking it! - cheers

crustycrab · 29/11/2019 12:18


Throwawayteachere · 29/11/2019 12:18

This is a ridiculous rule!
What age are children allowed to eat? If her child is 4 and you have a second will the 4 year old have to not have Christmas dinner?
The fact SIL and DH agree with MIL baffles me even more? I honestly can't see why they think your son should go hungry? This also means you aren't welcome at the dinner table as you can't leave a toddler alone with a 8 week old in another room? Or are the expecting your son to stand there and watch you all eat in silence? I would not attend this weird Christmas and your husband allowing your son to go hungry to make his mum happy is just maddening!

spanglydangly · 29/11/2019 12:18

This has got to be one of the craziest requests ever!

Be afraid of MIL and SIL, be very afraid!

alwaysthinkingofsleep · 29/11/2019 12:18

Insane. But you have to nip this in the bud now before other insane requests are made in the years to come.

HeyMissyYouSoFine · 29/11/2019 12:19

You and DH can take turns with DS on your lap

I expect that is what will happen and you won't get to eat christmas dinner in any peace - we used to have a portable highchair that folded up into a bag - if you can find a cheap one maybe worth having as a back up.

BestOption · 29/11/2019 12:19

They’re fucking nuts.

I wouldn’t go and DH, would be wise to choose very carefully what he did. If he went he had better take a BIG bag of stuff because he wouldn’t be welcome back.

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