To ask what things you'd do, if you weren't worried about being judged...

[stilltiredinthemorning]

I worry way too much about what other people (often strangers) think of me...

I am trying to work on this, but I think in reality it's probably a pretty fundamental part of my personality that I am unlikely to change.

There are probably quite a few things I would do/not do (mainly related to my children) if it wasn't for fear of being judged.

My top 3 are:

• Let my eldest (nearly 4) watch telly on a tablet in restaurants once she's finished her food, so I can enjoy mine.
• Potty trained later.
• Drive my daughter the 15 minute walk home from pre-school (to avoid the 25 million mini tantrums that mean it takes us at least 30 minutes)

What are yours?

I would wear a tracksuit outside of the house. I have one for when I'm at home but haven't ever ventured out in it, nor would I. For no real reason other than my Mum's voice in my head whispering "common, common, common" 57 times a minute.

Be fatter

Call a daughter Winter

Let my toddler watch nursery rhymes on my phone (very quietly) in a restaurant when in a grump so I can eat my food without trying to placate him then having to rush off before I can finish because he's grumpy/tired/I'm worried about being judged as a bad parent.

I'd probably buy and smoke weed regularly if it weren't illegal and generally frowned upon. I have chronic pain and insomnia and it would be a great help.

I won't do it though, as I have teenage sons and need to maintain the moral high ground!

Just out of interest, would either of you judge someone else for being fat or wearing a tracksuit? I'm asking because weirdly I wouldn't judge anyone for doing my 3, which perhaps makes me more ridiculous!

Pick my nose in public. Sorry. There’s always one.

I would have multi coloured highlights in my hair and wear Mary Jane shoes 😬

I would also drive faster (when no one is looking and it's safe to do so 😉)

I don’t give a crap about being judged. I let my kid watch Netflix on my phone if he won’t sit still in a restaurant, because I deserve to finish my meal that I’ve paid for and others deserve not to be bothered by a kid whinging. I draw the line at owning a tracksuit though!

Weed, wear much looser clothing and no underwear, sing along to my music in public, talk with strangers, tell someone at work to fuck away...

Oh and I'd dance more, without giving a thought to how I looked!

NeverGotMyPuppy I think Winter is a beautiful name!

You wouldn’t worry so much about what people think of you , if you knew how seldom they did .

Do what you want Op and sod what people think.

So , I do drive too and from school it's just not worth the stress

But I would go out obviously wearing no bra and pants (well maybe a bra but NO PANTS!)

Swear a LOT more. I currently choose my audience but I would love to just freely swear. I accidentally dropped a bomb in a parent teacher evening the other day when they were asking for volunteers to help with practical stuff around the school (gardening, building work etc). I said I didn't have any specialist skills in these areas but would happily assist with any shitwork I could. I just lost myself for a second! Was met with shocked faces and giggles. The teacher seemed happy with my offer though 😆 oops! I fucking love swearing!

Have a child alone using a sperm donor.

Get my nose pierced and dye my hair blonde (my conservative Asian family would be disgusted).

Actually tell people to fuck off to their faces when they treat me like shit rather than silently say it inside my head.

I’d sing in public and wear lots more glitter and hot pink

Just out of interest, would either of you judge someone else for being fat or wearing a tracksuit?

Not in a million years. Truly, never been the type of person who'd look at another woman to find fault. I've just got a weird hangup about me wearing tracksuit outside of the house; everyone else can fill their boots.

I would also intervene less when my kids are in a toddler death stare stand-off with another child over some toy or other. I actually think a lot of the time children should be allowed to figure it out for themselves, but I feel like I have to be there saying 'now little tired, you must share, remember how we talked about sharing (lies) it's the little boy's turn now' etc. etc.

I wore a bright, rainbow-coloured wig for Halloween. I don’t dye my hair, but my goodness, my skin looked amazing. No way in hell would I ever bother with the upkeep, nor do I have the charisma.

Have an affair. Funny one that though as being accountable to a community is what makes us decent humans imho so it’s not necessarily a bad thing. Different spin on the thread I know!

Candle1000 that's what my Mum used to say, but I feel that MN has somewhat proved her wrong...

After years of crippling anxiety surrounding what other people thought, made subtle snide comments about or just generally my hypersensitivity to how I appeared I decided - F*CK IT and made a conscious decision to ignore my inner bully. Its been v hard but so so worth it.

Pass the tablet, enjoy your meal OP.
Do the drive, enjoy the stress-reliever OP.
Wear the tracksuit FB2019

Join in, you CAN do it, and smile cheesily (and wave!) at the judgers and calmly tell them to bugger off if they pass comment! .

My new daily question is 'will I go to my grave glad I didn't do / missed out on X?'

The reason I don’t do some of these things is not because I’m worried about being judged though. It’s because I’m not an inconsiderate selfish twat.

I'd do historical battle reenactments. I'm actually quite cool but I love history and I'd love to spend a weekend pretending I live in the 17th century.
Even my DH doesn't know this....