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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not do this

178 replies

WhatTheFluck · 09/10/2019 20:41

Asked after school nanny today to do a later shift tomorrow, so will finish at 10pm.
Aibu not to do an evening meal for her? She isn't coming straight from another job

OP posts:
MIdgebabe · 09/10/2019 20:42

Start time? Normal times and food arrangements?

Apolloanddaphne · 09/10/2019 20:45

When will she start?

BarbedBloom · 09/10/2019 20:46

What time does she start?

DeathStare · 09/10/2019 20:48

Depends. Do you normally feed her?

It would certainly be unreasonable to expect her not to eat until after 10pm. Whether you need to provide food for her or whether she should bring her own would depend on your usual arrangements re food.

If this isn't normally an issue (ie if she is usually home in time to have her dinner at home) and if she's doing you a favour, then I would leave her something to eat just out of courtesy

HaveeeeYouMetTed · 09/10/2019 20:49

If you're already preparing a meal then I can't see what harm it is to plate up a portion for the nanny, who by the sounds of it, is helping you out by staying later than her normal time. The kids will have to eat so why can't she eat along side them Confused

Bluntness100 · 09/10/2019 20:52

What's your normal practice and I assume you'd leave food for her?

SunglassQueen · 09/10/2019 20:52

Is this a reverse ? Just do her a meal, if she doesn't eat it freeze it

NerrSnerr · 09/10/2019 20:53

What time will she be starting?

seaweedandmarchingbands · 09/10/2019 20:55

Why would you not feed her?

BoneyBackJefferson · 09/10/2019 20:56

not enough information.

Start time, how long is the shift?
What time does she finish the previous job?
Travel time?

Original poster
WhatTheFluck · 09/10/2019 20:57

Normally does 3pm till 6pm. Need her to do 3PM till 10PM.

OP posts:
Sparklesocks · 09/10/2019 20:57

I think I would, what time does she start?

Mouikey · 09/10/2019 20:57

Seriously? If I have someone in to look after my child, I want them to feel welcome and comfortable. Providing them with a meal, snacks and drink is standard isn’t it???

Sparklesocks · 09/10/2019 20:58

Oh definitely would! That’s 7 hours (well more including travel) without food!

Neverender · 09/10/2019 20:58

Of course she need to eat from 3pm...what are you on about!?

Original poster
WhatTheFluck · 09/10/2019 20:58

Finishes other job at 12PM.
Don't normally leave dinner for her
Only a short commute to mine and back

OP posts:
picklemepopcorn · 09/10/2019 20:58

That's a fair time to go with nothing. Isn't a break every six hours compulsory?

I presume you intend her to feed your child, can she have the same as them?

Apolloanddaphne · 09/10/2019 20:58

Blimey. You want her to work for 7 hours, and presumably feed your DC in that time, but you don't want her to have meal? YABVVU

Mouikey · 09/10/2019 20:59

Seen your update - 3-6 no meal but snacks and drink. 3 - 10 (which is 7 hours so officially should have a 30 minute break), I would absolutely give a meal, snacks and drink. How else would you expect them to eat?

seaweedandmarchingbands · 09/10/2019 20:59

Of course you need to feed her.

babycatcher411 · 09/10/2019 20:59

Very unreasonable.
If you worked from 3-10pm would you expect to not have dinner? Surely it’ll cost pennies more for an extra portion when the kids are already eating?

PotteringAlong · 09/10/2019 21:00

Why would you not feed her?

Tiredmum100 · 09/10/2019 21:00

Would you go 3 pm to 10 pm without eating? I wouldn't. I would provide a meal.

WhoKnewBeefStew · 09/10/2019 21:02

Blimey, surely a pizza, sandwiches or something similar is doable. Seems very unreasonable and not very charitable of you not to at least offer her somethings

LonginesPrime · 09/10/2019 21:02

She will need to eat during that time, and presumably she'll be feeding your DC a meal?

Could she bring a sandwich and eat it in the cupboard under the stairs?

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