Is it rude for my partner to get up and add leftovers to the meal I just made him or am I just hormonal ??

[Hidingfrommyfamily]

Hello there- I’m wondering if you could clear up a question around table manners please?
For a family evening dinner a member of the family cooks a homemade pie and a vegetable salad. It takes quite a while and care is taken to present the meal.
The person it is served to picks at the parts of the salad they like and then goes to the kitchen and brings back some leftover cold veg from the fridge and adds it to the meal. Is this bad table manners?

At home with just family, I don't think it's bad manners.

Nope not rude at all.

Not at all - leftovers are meant to be eaten aren’t they?

No I don’t think it’s rude, just being at ease in his own home.

It's not like he chucked what you made in the bin! Or ruined the presentation. Or added a pizza. He just wanted some more veg. Hardly crime of the century! YABU.

Doesn’t strike me as especially rude.

Certainly no ruder than serving someone a meal that includes ingredients they don’t like.

Not remotely rude. And it’s pointless to try to anonymize who is who when you’ve said in the title....

No, leftover should be eaten!

I would encourage this if I noticed it wasn’t happening.

A meal isn’t sacred, the love and time together is.

Not rude. They’re the one that has to eat it, why shouldn’t they enhance it? It’s not saying they don’t like it or appreciate your efforts.

I think it’s a bit odd to be honest. I’d be a bit if the person just got up and did that without a word.

Do he say anything?

At home? Not rude

Absolutely not rude in your own house with family

I admit I might find it slightly irritating .... but can’t really articulate why. . If I’ve planned and prepared a meal & then my DH says he’ll just eat up some leftovers then I feel I have wasted the time cooking. But if he eats my meal and the leftovers then I think he is greedy - so he can’t win really .

Sorry but Yabu. It's a bit formal and stuffy to expect someone to not eat what they want in their own home. Sure, if they didn't eat the meal you'd spent ages on, thatd be rude, but just adding to it is surely fine.

If it's leftover veg I'd rather it was ate, same with any other food.

Your home sounds formal and not relaxed.. he should be able to add stuff if he wants

I don’t think this is rude at an informal family dinner. I wouldn’t even bat an eyelid.

Wouldn't bother me at all, in fact it's the kind of thing I'd do

Pie and salad is weird, no wonder he added veg

Why have you written your post like that? You already said it was about your partner.
Yes I think YABU.

“Present the meal”.....sounds very formal for a dinner at home.

My husband just hands me a plate🤷‍♀️

pie and salad?

I'd rather it was used up... Wouldn't bother be at all.

You really need to not tell anybody about this in real life.

You’re taking ‘hormonal’ to all new levels here OP.