‘Disgusting’ for pumping in public.

[TopazPearl]

I was recently out for my best friends hen for my first overnight stay without my babyDD.

I’m breast feeding my baby so took my breast pump out with me

I'm glad she's apologised, her behaviour grabbing you etc is not on.

However, I don't think expressing in public is necessary at all. Feeding a baby is different to expressing and personally I would've gone to the toilet to do it.

I exclusively pumped for my baby. If I hadn't pumped in public I would have barely left the house. Yanbu OP.

personally I would've gone to the toilet to do it.

Fine. However do you think it was unreasonable for the OP to avoid a grotty toilet?

The 'attention seeking' comments are depressing beyond words. And so unempathetic I could cry.

Why would you be seeking attention by pumping?

Pumping is a necessary, important but annoying thing to do. It's not pretty and it's not enjoyable. Only a twat would conclude that it's attention seeking behaviour.

Laurie tbh, I would go to the toilet to deal with any bodily fluids.

shpoot that's not what I asked you.

I am enjoying the (more veiled than usual) connections being drawn between breast milk and shit though. Nice work all.

Sitting on a public toilet for a shit and sitting on a public toilet to make food for your baby are not really in the same league, are they?

The posters who are making comments that you are "attention seeking" by pumping. Utter drivel. Give yer heids a wobble. It's an important part of breastfeeding. Anything that supports a breastfeeding mum is good I think and being able to pump when needed is essential to that. I really struggled with BF my first DD years ago, and pretty much never went anywhere as I felt so self-conscious and lacking in confidence about it. Attitudes like those expressed by some on this thread really do not help first time mums in particular, who are just trying to feed their baby.

What I find disgusting are angry drunks, like your MIL. Really, if you can't handle your drink she needs to knock that on the head. Perhaps she needs an angry lecture on knowing her limits. I'm a recovering alcoholic and the demonic possession when drunk is a big red flag. A massive one in fact.

It wouldn't bother me in the slightest if someone was pumping milk somewhere in front of me. It's milk. For a baby. It's a wonderful thing. I'm glad to hear that you've been able to see the funny/ridiculous side of what happened OP. I'm not sure I would be as resilient as you are. Stupid cow MIL. Makes me angry on your behalf.

@SleepingStandingUp I wouldn’t disapprove in the slightest. My discomfort comes from an upbringing by barmpots who view the female body as shameful. Funnily enough they insist on fairly constant reproduction whil demanding all signs of it be hidden. I don’r agree with their views, but condioning is a bugger.
Anyway, my hang up = my problem. Not the problem of anyone getting on with the reality of breastfeeding.
Peculiar? Completely agree! 😂

Everything LaurieMarlow has said.

.

Discreetly breast pumping under your clothes is in no way “disgusting” and your MIL was totally out of order. She sounds like a total nightmare. YANBU.

I can't believe some of the comments on here! Attention seeking? What a load of crap. Of course you didn't do anything wrong. What a ridiculous reaction from MIL and what a shame she made a scene ( not you!)

You didn’t do anything wrong, the MIL is completely batshit and I feel sorry for your friend.

It sounds like your friend has the future MIL from hell.

Well done for breastfeeding and please take no notice!

I know of breastfeeing mums who exclusively pump. This is how they chose / only way they can feed their babies. These mums need to pump to feed their babies on demand. It is VERY hard work, and I take my hats off to those mums. I therefore do not see an issue with pumping in public. You can actually get some discreet quiet pumps these days.
Sorry you had to experience that

@TopazPearl I'm sadly one of those that tried to bf/pump and failed miserably so just for that I salute you.
As for pumping in company of your friends (bar the next table of fellow hens) I really don't see the issue at all. You did what you had to, why go and sit in the toilets when the friends on the table with you didn't care.
Good for you and I'd just remind the bride often of what a monster MIL she has. Luckily for me, mine would never behave in such a manner.
I don't see that you'd done anything wrong, just forget about it, she isn't your MIL luckily

I have no idea why you shouldn't pump in public. It's only because some people are still squeemish about breastmilk. You can put everything under your clothes so you're much less exposed than if you were feeding an actual baby.

She wished her daughter had got you 'by the throat'? What a classy bunch. Them, not you OP.

@Jaxtellerswife your awesome!!

Some people will get upset over anything.

Even then, those people should be capable of keeping their feelings to themselves on certain occasions instead of making a huge fuss. Such as at a person's hen party, for example.

Pumping in a public loo would have been disgusting.

Thinking of the synonyms:
'revolting, repellent, repulsive, sickening, nauseating, nauseous, stomach-churning, stomach-turning, off-putting, unpalatable, unappetizing, uninviting, unsavoury, distasteful, foul, nasty, obnoxious, odious; More'

And applying them to the potential effect on the baby. Could have been literally sickening.

not everyone can go all day and night without having to empty, i used to pump every 4 hours i would fill a 330 ml bottle from one side and do about 300 ml from the other side... every 4 hours, so sometimes you have to just get stuck in and empty them, it is possible to be discrete its not always top off and tits out fuck the MIL, tell her the next time she places her hands on you it will be the last time she has hands

Fucking hell, no wonder bf rates are so low in this country if some of the posters on here are anything to go by! What's disgusting about milk? Or breasts? You can all fuck off with your 'bodily fluid' comments, unless you regularly protest at anyone consuming dairy products within view.

I've pumped on a packed train many a time on my way to/from London once I was back at work. DS couldn't have formula so I needed to bag up the milk for his consumption, and I had zero intention of pumping in the loo. Would you prepare your child's lunch in a public toilet? No-one ever said anything to me, I was covered up by a shawl and the Medela Swing is really quiet compared to the noise of a train. Some people really need to get a life and ask themselves why they feel so disgusted by a normal bodily function (one that doesn't smell or contain shitloads of germs).

It sounds like you ruined your bestfriend’s hen do which is a shame.

WTAF?

Even those suggesting nice ways to be "discreet" about it - WTAF?

OP, I'm ashamed for women everywhere that you're getting these responses.

You were definitely not being unreasonable.

Struggling to understand how or why anyone would care about someone making food for their baby. We have some really warped perceptions about breastfeeding in this country, which is probably part of the reason breastfeeding rates are so low and why so many women feel discouraged.

Good for you, OP. I'm sorry you had to deal with a drunk and aggressive idiot, but you're doing good!

@LaLoba Peculiar? Completely agree! 😂 also my point was you can be that whilst being a decent person who would have defended Op's right to not sit in a filthy club loo for 20 minutes. So odd but nice, like Al lthe best people 😂 😂 😂

I wonder how many of the go hide in the loo you dirty beast people would have then moaned if OP had held up a loo for 20 minutes which then meant they had to queue for longer