DP got told off in the supermarket last night

[OnlyBaBaBiss]

DP went to the supermarket last night when he finished work, he took a couple of kids so I could bath the baby while he was gone so he took DD1(6) and DS2(2) with him

He said while he was there an old woman was laughing at something silly DS was doing (being a frog) and came over to say something to DP, he was expecting it to be something nice about DS so greeted her with a smile and got “he’s very sweet but honestly he’ll never learn to behave properly while you’re bringing him out at this time, take him home to bed!”

It wasn’t even 7pm!

DP said he was so surprised he just said “oh ok will do”
DD was so amused that Daddy got told off

AIBU to think that 7pm is not too late to have a 2 year old out ... on a Friday night ... in the summer! 🤦🏻‍♀️

YANBU when my DS was 2 he still had long naps in the day so would be up until about 9 (we tried to change that routine but that was the only way he got enough sleep). Even a kid who didn't nap would still be up at 7 though surely!

No it isn't. My 3 year old goes to bed at 9 at weekends. And don't get me started on my 13mo who won't go to bed until 11!

And the fact that she was old is relevant exactly why?

Mine goes up to start bed routine at 7, asleep for 8. But I'd assume a kid in a shop jumping around being a frog is awake enough to not asleep normally at that time. It's not like he has work in the morning.

I wonder if she'd have saida the same to a mum?

Do you kids actually sleep later if they go to bed later? Late bed time just means less sleep here

I dont think I've ever managed to get DD in bed before 9pm. She's 11 now.

She's just a big ball of energy.

Ignore her, it sounds like he's basically just done the equivalent of smiling & nodding 'oh ok then'.

Of course everyone is going to tell you YANBU. Clearly this woman thought your DP WBU. I don't know why she had to make the effort to tell him though!

And the fact that she was old is relevant exactly why?
She nay have more generationally entrenched ideas about children's routines and fathers not knowing better. It may also moderate the fathers response in how he responds to someone his own age or his mothers age.

So he was getting in peoples way jumping around on the floor?

Oh bert.. it sets the scene doesn't it? And it gives us the idea she is old school set in her ways...that doesn't mean it's ageist.

Supermarkets are pretty big and largely empty at that time of night. Its possibly to have plenty of room to be a cute funny frog without being a naughty brat getting under people's feet whilst his feckless father ignores him for a quiet life

Respect to your fabulous DP for being so polite to her and taking your DC shopping whilst you bathed the baby.

He's a keeper for sure.
It was a perfectly normal time to take the DC to the shops esp on a Friday night which is not a school night.

Ah yes. The old " setting the scene" line.

Supermarkets round here are certainly not empty at 7pm!

(Shall I add a generalisation about London to add to Dad’s, old people, frogs etc?)

It's totally relevant that she was old with old fashioned and outdated opinions who thought she could give unsolicited advice so freely.

And "respect to fabulous dp"..... What, for being a parent? Why not "respect to fabulous OP" for bathing the baby?

One persons silly is another persons badly behaved unsupervised child.

You've upset Bertrand on both ageism and feminism. Well done!

Yeah. All those old people who were born in the 1950s and brought up their children in the permissive 70s and 80s.

That's what it is, scene-setting. Why is that even an issue here? There was absolutely no derogatory comment about the lady.

OP, I think it's late for such young kids to be out but who cares? It works for them, works for you, therefore another non-issue.

I won't agree that your husband is 'fabulous' for taking them shopping because my bar's a bit higher. I think perhaps he could supermarket socialise them a bit more often and then he won't have his little sensibilities offended, he'll become hardened like the rest of us!

Drat... I'm sorry that I posted the comment about the DP. He is fabulous OP, he is!

@BertrandRussell

Yep the old "he's a keeper" for doing normal things that no mum ever gets thanked for.

tbh, I think it's kind of funny she pulled him up.
As for whether or not small children shouldn't be out at 7pm, that's your business. Seems 7pm would be a reasonable time to get them settled for the evening before bed.

"That's what it is, scene-setting. Why is that even an issue here? There was absolutely no derogatory comment about the lady."
Well, apart from the fact that she was an arse. Why is old OK as scene setting but not fat or black or disabled? If it was genuine scene setting, why not "lady in a blue dress"?