Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

An homage....to the CFN

204 replies

lastkisstoo · 01/08/2017 14:49

In light of recent threads, it has enlightened and amused me no end at the amount of cheeky fuckerdom of the highest order that lives among us.

What is your experience of the CFN?

I will start with mine. The circumstances are not funny at all but her actions raised a smile even then so thank you CFN for a bit of light in the darkness.

My husband died in our home many years ago. After a week or so of me not living there due to the circumstances of his death I had reason to visit the street that we lived. On seeing me out of her window a neighbour from a few doors away ran over to me and asked if she could buy my livingroom blinds 'on account of me not needing them any more' Shock

OP posts:
Lucisky · 05/08/2017 15:21

Not a cfn, but something that happened to nice neighbours. Living at home and we all had very big gardens. Our ndns had a lovely outdoor pool installed. They were very quiet people, so we were very surprised, during the hot summer of 1976, to keep hearing pool parties, kids screaming during the day, endless splashing, a bit like being next to a public pool. Oh well, we thought, it's a new toy, at least they are getting their money's worth. Except - they werent even there! Apparently only one person originally knew they had gone away, but word spread and it became a free for all. They were mortified when they came back several weeks later, although we thought it was funny.

HunterHearstHelmsley · 05/08/2017 22:08

I was CFN once. Fuckers killed one of my cats so I made it my life's mission to get rid of them. Every parking trick under the sun. Late night excursions into their garden to train one of the other cats to shit in their sand pit.

My favourite part was making a terrible racket all the time. They reported to the council. Luckily I saw the man turn up and I was quiet as a mouse for weeks. They looked like utter twats and put their house up for sale not long after.

Original poster
lastkisstoo · 05/08/2017 23:08

I'm fucking zen me

GrinGrinGrin

OP posts:
Original poster
lastkisstoo · 05/08/2017 23:10

@HunterHearstHelmsley

They did what?!?! Shock

OP posts:
Twopeapods · 05/08/2017 23:30

You trained your cat to poo in their child's sandpit Hunter.
That is really grim.

Twopeapods · 05/08/2017 23:31

Did they kill your cat on purpose or was it an accident?

HunterHearstHelmsley · 06/08/2017 08:13

They poisoned him deliberately. They admitted it whilst laughing in my face that there was nothing I could do about it.

TooLow · 06/08/2017 08:23

@HunterHearstHelmsley really? That's just pure evil

aaaaargghhhhelpme · 06/08/2017 08:39

Oh hunter. Sorry to hear about your cat Flowers I can't believe people can be so evil

BananaSandwichesEveryDay · 06/08/2017 10:05

Sorry if this has been mentioned already, I haven't yet rtft. I believe one of the reasons why local authorities are loathe to mark disabled parking spaces in residential areas is that basically anyone with a blue badge can use them and the spaces cannot be made private. There was a huge campaign for one in this area a while back but the council refused to do it as they said there were several badge holders in the road who would be able to use the space so it would not have necessarily been any better for the resident concerned.

Original poster
lastkisstoo · 06/08/2017 20:45

So sorry to hear Hunter, that is truly awful Sad Flowers

I think I would have done the same as you....killing the cat unforgiveable enough without then goading you about it Angry

OP posts:
nonfatnofoamlatte · 07/08/2017 04:07

@HunterHearstHelmsley I'm so sorry about what happened to your kitty! I would have done the same thing too and maybe burned their house down

IamtheDevilsAvocado · 07/08/2017 05:23

Lived in a posh block of flats,for which we oaid a high enough rent . We had a car park which previously had been part of the gardens. There was just about enough space for the residents 10 cars.

Couldn't discover who was continually parking , and blocking different neighbours in...left notes etc. ...but the cheeky fucker would move tier car under darkness...

Eventually discovered it was some women who lived in the terrace house opposite. ...and her many 'callers'...she got really annoyed when we blocked one of her customers cars in (our own ) drive.

This went on for months...in the end one of our residents completely lost it having been blocked in for nth time...put notes all over her car with superglue....still she continued to park in our drive. ..by now quite blatantly. It only stopped when furious resident upped the ante and showed her the paint stripper which would be left on her car...

This woman was unbelievably thick skinned at one point t asking me'where else am I supposed to park?'...I pointed out the 2 public car parks less than 2 mins walk away...she looked incredulous....but incredulous 'but I'd have to pay there'....Yes like we do to rent our car spaces you keep using. ..

She still managed free (to her) parking for months ...Angry

TheAntiBoop · 07/08/2017 09:39

My neighbour has a disabled space right outside our block which specified her permit number. Have the rules changed on being able to do that?

nigelsbigface · 07/08/2017 11:05

My mums new neighbour believed that he owned the land Mums Car Port and hard standing is on, which is directly in front of my mums front door (my mum lives in a converted barn thing, around a farm yard with lots of other houses all opening on to the yard).
One day we came home to find he had Parked a large yellow digger, with the front of it about 30 cm from the front door, and a tractor behind it, on the hard standing, and a very old crumbly Ford Escort under the car port.
It took three months of asking nicely, asking less nicely, and then legal argument to get him to move them (during which time we had to climb over a waist height wall and use our back door to access the house). This encompassed the Christmas period, so my Dad went out and strung fairy lights on them.He called the Police to say Dad had vandalised his property Grin
As it turned out he didn't own the land and had to move the vehicles. (Which he did but in the middle of the night so we couldn't even watch him do it with smug faces on us)

For his next trick he dumped two tons of broken rubble in front of one of our neighbours driveways as he thought he owned the access...again incorrectly...

And so it goes on...

sashh · 07/08/2017 12:05

Our council does not do disabled bays in residential parking areas. At all. Otherwise I'd be on it!

They are breaking the law, under the equality act they have to examine how their policies affect and effect people with 'protected characteristics'.

Get on to your local councilor.

purpleprincess24 · 08/08/2017 15:16

A 'friend' used to park on our drive when they went on holiday, rather than paying the ridiculous parking fees at the airport. They would turn up the night before, expecting to be fed and entertained, before giving them a lift to the airport at some godly unearthly time.

They did this at least twice a year for a minimum of 3 weeks each time. I never got so much as a cheap bunch of petrol station flowers.

One year (after they'd been doing this for around 4 years) we were having a lot of work done to the house and didn't have the room for an extra car due to scaffolding etc .... explained that this time they'd have to make alternative arrangement.

They sent me an invoice for their hotel and car park charges as apparently it was 'my responsibility as they hadn't budgeted for parking' ... NOT MY PROBLEM

Never heard from them again.

Lorddenning1 · 08/08/2017 19:55

@purpleprincess24 omg really, I can't believe there are actual people like this lol

Original poster
lastkisstoo · 09/08/2017 00:07

@purpleprincess24 I'm speechless! Shock

OP posts:
GlitteryFluff · 09/08/2017 00:14

Some of these are just Shock!
Killing neighbours cats and invoicing parking charges. I can't believe people like this actually exist!

CeCeDrake · 09/08/2017 11:23

sweet jesus i cant cope with that purpleprincess

WaaWaaWaaa · 09/08/2017 16:55

Brilliant thread - MORE please!

wowfudge · 09/08/2017 19:16

No CFN but CFMN (cheeky fucker mother of neighbour). We have a shared drive which we own and our neighbours have a right of way over. She called round today with the guy who cuts the grass and does bits of gardening for both households and tried to bully DP into getting various hedges cut back, including along the drive as apparently it's really difficult to get up due to the encroaching hedges Hmm. Funny, but I manage without incident twice a day and nothing even brushes against the car. The steep gradient and hairpin bend make it tricky if you are are unfamiliar with it.

Anyway, there was quite a bit more, but I'm livid as she doesn't even bloody live here, but was talking about which bit is yours and which bit is ours. I had a really long chat with one of the neighbours last week and we discussed one shared part of the garden which we would look to change and make easier to maintain. Hedges were not mentioned!

Elephant17 · 09/08/2017 20:07

Great idea for a thread OP, but OMG that is awful! I think I would have head-butted him/her! Flowers

Love this one:

A01/08/2017 14:54 MrTrebus My neighbour kept not putting their bins out on bin day. They live upstairs in our block but we're ground floor by the bin shed. Had to put the bins out the front each week as otherwise they would stink. He used to see me do it sometimes and say "wow cant believe them across the block just let you do this" but i KNEW it was him. One day their water bill was poking out of one of these bags so i piled up all the bags in front of their front door, posted their water bill through their door with a note and then stayed in my flat listening to the fall out. They are wimps though and never mentioned it again but now ALWAYS put their bins out. Felt like a massive victory.stonishing, OP! I would have head-butted the fucker!!

Elephant17 · 09/08/2017 20:07

Sorry, got a bit mixed up there with my cutting and pasting!!

Swipe left for the next trending thread