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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have told DD I was going to have sex

179 replies

Strawberryshortcake40 · 29/07/2017 14:27

Yesterday DC were due at their dads for day so I could work (exdh). I see clients at home and it needs to be a relatively peaceful environment. DD (19) did not want to go first thing despite being asked nicely a few days prior and night before.

It is somewhat essential she goes as she is the noisiest of all of them and is the only one who will start an argument or make a lot of disruption whilst I'm trying to act professionally!!

So I told her I was planning on having a man round for sex. That I was fine with her being there as long as she was okay with there being a naked man potentially wandering round the house, etc.

She packed her things in record time and stormed out of the house telling me I was sick and disgusting.

So Aibu? Shes still not talking to me....

OP posts:
Kentnurse2015 · 29/07/2017 14:29

What?!!!

Zubba · 29/07/2017 14:29

I call bullshit.

MargaretTwatyer · 29/07/2017 14:30

Er, yes. No child wants to think of their parent having sex.

Also are you saying you are a prostitute and have sex for money? Blimey, there's being relaxed but telling your kids about that is a step too far.

BasedOnTrueEvents · 29/07/2017 14:30

Are you having a man round for sex OP? Or did you just tell her that's so she'd go?

MargaretTwatyer · 29/07/2017 14:30

Or is the 'clients' for something different?

RiseToday · 29/07/2017 14:30

No you're not BU.

She sounds like a pain in the ass!

RiseToday · 29/07/2017 14:30

No you're not BU.

She sounds like a pain in the ass!

GetafixTheDruid · 29/07/2017 14:30

Are you a prostitute or was that just a way to get her out of the house?

WorraLiberty · 29/07/2017 14:31

Why would a naked man be wondering around her home anyway, knowing there's a 19yr old female there?

I wouldn't be speaking to you either if you'd put that idea in my head tbh.

Creepy.

dementedpixie · 29/07/2017 14:31

Think OP just said it as she knew her dd would leave faster

Original poster
Strawberryshortcake40 · 29/07/2017 14:32

No I'm not a prostitute!!!!

I told her I had a new boyfriend who was popping round for the day. As the fact I needed to work wasn't enough for her to actually go for a day with her dad.

OP posts:
NicolasFlamel · 29/07/2017 14:32

Clients as in to clients you have sex with? I dont thibk any 19 year old wants to think about their mum having sex with a partner let alone a "client". I wouldn't have told her that.

FretYeNotAllIsShiny · 29/07/2017 14:32

I think you are going to get a lot of flack about not respecting your daughter's right to be at home without some randomer walking round with his goodies out. Or flack about lying to your child. Or expecting an adult child to clear on out whilst you work.

But dammit if this didn't make me laugh. A lot.

Sparklingbrook · 29/07/2017 14:32

How odd.

Floofborksnootandboop · 29/07/2017 14:33

At 19 she should be able to understand that you're seeing clients and she needs to stay out of the way. I can't even begin to imagine forcing my younger children to go to their dads, let alone the adult ones!

Original poster
Strawberryshortcake40 · 29/07/2017 14:33

I told her so she would go.
Which worked.

Tbh I would rather be able to have a DC who understood how to be quiet!!!

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 29/07/2017 14:33

But why would any boyfriend of yours be walking around the house naked, if your daughter was home?

I get that you just said it to make her leave the house, but why would you put that idea in her head?

catsbeensickagain · 29/07/2017 14:34

That's really weird.

Even weirder though is a 19 year old who doesn't understand that her parents need to work and who would make a disturbance. Why couldn't she go out to town for the day or see friends or be in her room or anything else really.

Whole thing is off.

Rufustherenegadereindeer1 · 29/07/2017 14:34

I think thats ok at her age strawberry

Grin
Original poster
Strawberryshortcake40 · 29/07/2017 14:34

I don't mind at all her being home, if she can be quiet. She wanted to go to her dads but at a time that suited her even knowing I had work booked in.

I tried pointing out that it's my work that gives her money for uni but to no avail.

OP posts:
Gingernaut · 29/07/2017 14:35

I get it.

You were working from home and needed peace and quiet, which wouldn't happen if the kiddiwinks were around.

You grossed DD19 out, knowing that disgusting her would make her want to get away from you.

BasedOnTrueEvents · 29/07/2017 14:35

A 19 year old adult should be able to understand that she needs to go out so you can work or stay in her room silently so you can do so.

Original poster
Strawberryshortcake40 · 29/07/2017 14:36

I tried saying I was working, might have a friend round, might need to do some housework (and want her to help), the naked man wandering around was my final desperate idea to get her arse out of bed.

Sadly there was no naked man.

OP posts:
Bobbiepin · 29/07/2017 14:36

If you aren't a hooker, what do you do?

PopcornNRedwine · 29/07/2017 14:37

How old are your DC?

And what actually is your job?

however, I say YABU because excuse or not, I don't think telling your kids your going to be having sex is ever really the right way to go about things.