To have told DD I was going to have sex

[Strawberryshortcake40]

Yesterday DC were due at their dads for day so I could work (exdh). I see clients at home and it needs to be a relatively peaceful environment. DD (19) did not want to go first thing despite being asked nicely a few days prior and night before.

It is somewhat essential she goes as she is the noisiest of all of them and is the only one who will start an argument or make a lot of disruption whilst I'm trying to act professionally!!

So I told her I was planning on having a man round for sex. That I was fine with her being there as long as she was okay with there being a naked man potentially wandering round the house, etc.

She packed her things in record time and stormed out of the house telling me I was sick and disgusting.

So Aibu? Shes still not talking to me....

No I haven't told her the truth yet. Tbh it was all said in a jokey tone anyway. She hasn't asked whether it was true either.

To whoever asked - no sign of middle DC recovering yet unfortunately. We live on a knife edge here most days as to whether she will be admitted soon or not. It makes for a pretty stressful environment at home. Which was why instead of shouting at eldest DD or laying down the law I tried to lighten the mood about it all!

I think you win mum-ing.

Nothing wrong with pointing out to an adult child that you have adult needs. Encourages them to leave home!

Hope middle DC is ok.

I actually think this is hilarious, it worked as well so no, Yanbu.

Clearly yabu

I don't think you were unreasonable, she will see the funny side later on. Might be slightly missing the point of the thread but as a mum of real littlies (5 and 1) I am absolutely dismayed that a nineteen year old can't be quiet while you work!!! I thought that might happen by the age of about, I dunno, 11? No?!

Penelope - my other two figured it out pretty much by school age. So sure you will be fine 😂

Definitely not BU.

She's 19. The idea that adults have sex shouldn't be a complete surprise to her. And she's completely earned being made to feel a bit uncomfortable.

I hope she grows out of the selfishness soon OP.

At 19 no you not being unreasonable. Work or sex (or both?!) shes old enough to understand her mum needs personal time lol

YANBU grossing teenagers out is payback for years of dedication, sleepless nights and dealing with tantrums.

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Well done OP!! Excellent response to a stroppy teenager & as it's had a similar affect on ex too I'd say win win 😁

Well played, OP, excellent lateral thinking and exactly the sort of thing I would say to DCs.

There are some very humourless people on this thread. I knew you were joking and I'm autistic ffs.

Dear God, the amount of humour less posters who just want to blame you for any of your dd's poor behaviour! Cos our kids are perfectly behaved angels at all times

I laughed, it was funny you grossed her out. If she is that unhappy she can live with her Dad or get work to get out the house. You would hope your adult child would support their mum especially with a poorly younger sibling. She sounds like her fathers daughter OP and it sounds like you have enough on your plate without humouring her strops.

I hope things get better for you. Keep that sense of humour, it may be dry but it will get you through

YANBU - hilarious!
Have you put your DD straight yet? and have you stressed how important it is that your work environment is professional? At 19 she really ought to understand that.

Well I understood what OP said. She said a shock thing to get irritating teenager out of house so she could work. At no point does that mean she's a sex worker. Just dealing with a pain in the arse offspring.
They can be massively irritating. And she's , teenager, old enough to know better. They do better - eventually!!

Oh goodness me !!! How did some posters extrapolate prostitution from the post ?!!!

Op-YANBU! Serves her right for being an unruly teenager and I'm sure at 19, at university , she hears far illicit conversations than this! Yes you don't want to hear/ picture that your mom is having sex but I'm sure at her age she is mature enough to sense that you're joking!

Some posters need to chill! She's 19 not 9!!!!!!!!!

Tell her to grow up it was a joke!

she's 19 for Gods sake not 9!

@Gottagetmoving yep! Totally judgy. Horribly judgy. And mean-spirited. #sorrynotsorry

And if there was an emoticon for sticking out your tongue I'd put that in as well!

@gingergenius
Ah,....I get it now...You are not actually a grown up!

I think it was Shakespeare or Christopher Marlowe or Ben Johnson, one of the three, they were friends, who coined the phrase "The foulest coin has no smell."

Remain calm, she just needs to incubate the concept.

Don't be upset or punish yourself.

Katherine Jenkins, Hallelujah.

OP I am sorry you are living on a knife edge sometimes and I really feel for you. Its tricky here too with 20 year old DD. You sound like a wonderful loving mum. I employ a laugh to jolly DD along and it works sometimes. You are doing a great job

Sadly @Gottagetmoving very much a grown-up. I just haven't list my sense of humour!

Poor OP being faced with a bunch of thickos totally missing the point.

Sorry @MissAlligned - that was a bit harsh! Who's a thicko?

Omg I can't stop laughing.

Too funny. And you do whatever you can think of to get your work done without a war.

At 19 I didn't want to leave my bed for anything and if my mum said that to me I would have been out like a shot!!

Wouldn't of risked it not being a joke ok got the message.. bye!!

She's probably in a mood coz she knows she has been had so walk round with a sense of victory

You can't have kids and no sense of humour. If only for your sanity