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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To tell you to *read* the fucking invite..

420 replies

Bitchfromhell · 20/07/2017 17:59

Major embarrassment narrowly avoided and I'm cringing at what might have happened Blush

Fancy wedding on Saturday, was so excited to get an invitation months ago. Have bought 2 outfits in the sales so can return the one I don't choose on the day. Booked the hairdressers for the morning, even lost a few pounds. We don't get many wedding invites these days and I love a good wedding so admittedly completely over invested Blush

Checked the invite for timings this morning and realised we haven't actually been invited to the whole thing. Just the ceremony at 1pm and then the evening do at 7pm.

I've spent all afternoon imagining us wondering about the fancy venue looking for our seats for the breakfast, being whispered to quietly by the formidable mother of the bride that we shouldn't actually be there. God it would have been awful. These aren't the sort of folk that would laugh it off. We'd have looked like proper dickheads.

Anyway, lesson learned, always read the invitation.

OP posts:
Hissy · 20/07/2017 18:03

Erm... the ceremony and The evening IS the whole wedding...

The "breakfast" actually refers to the meal after the ceremony.

Dumdedumdum · 20/07/2017 18:05

She's not been invited to the breakfast...

RatherBeCrazy · 20/07/2017 18:05

I'm confused, I thought you're either invited to the whole thing or the evening. Do people actually expect their guests to mill about between the ceremony and evening for hours? Confused

OrangeSeville · 20/07/2017 18:05

Oh god I'm cringing for you Blush

Fruitbat1980 · 20/07/2017 18:05

YANBU - this is the stuff of my nightmares!

GooodMythicalMorning · 20/07/2017 18:06

No it isn't. Usually the reception is in the middle!

onemorecakeplease · 20/07/2017 18:06

Why do people DO that?

So bloody rude. Come see me get married, buy me a gift, then hang around for six hours and come for a drink in the evening so I don't have to feed you.

StripySocks1 · 20/07/2017 18:07

To be fair it's pretty unusual to be invited to the ceremony if you're not invited to the breakfast, are they usually cheapskates?

Original poster
Bitchfromhell · 20/07/2017 18:07

I know, but we're not invited to that bit. Just the ceremony at location A at 1pm. Then location B at 7pm.
The actual breakfast, speeches and shit will (I imagine) be happening between those times at location B.

Wondering if I should just brazen it out now and go anyway, was looking forward to it Grin

OP posts:
PatMullins · 20/07/2017 18:07

Whaaa? Confused is this a thing?

RatherBeCrazy · 20/07/2017 18:08

It doesn't make sense. "You're special enough to us that we want you there when we say our vows, but we don't want to pay for your meal" 😂

7Days · 20/07/2017 18:08

Thats horrendous. They won't feed you?

DontTouchTheMoustache · 20/07/2017 18:08

Why on earth would the bride and groom do that, I bet loads of people have misinterpreted it.

EverythingEverywhere1234 · 20/07/2017 18:08

What?! Is being invited to the ceremony, NOT the breakfast and then invited again to the evening do a thing?? How bloody rude!

Hissy · 20/07/2017 18:08

Oh I see...

That does happen, and it's rude imo

RatherBeCrazy · 20/07/2017 18:09

At least you get to wear both dresses!

DailyMailReadersAreThick · 20/07/2017 18:09

So bloody rude. Come see me get married, buy me a gift, then hang around for six hours and come for a drink in the evening so I don't have to feed you.

A special kind of entitlement has risen up about weddings in the past decade or so. So much that exceptional rudeness is now seen as normal by many people!

WeddingsAreStressful · 20/07/2017 18:09

OMG I don't think I would have realised I wasn't invited to the meal...I mean, who fucking does that? You're supposed to go to the church, sit around for ages and get your own food and then go for the party only? So unbelievably rude

SunsetGrigio · 20/07/2017 18:10

Are you sure you're not invited to the whole thing, if I'm invited to the ceremony I'd just assume wedding breakfast too, is the service within the venue?

ShatnersBassoon · 20/07/2017 18:10

Oh god, how awkward would that have been?! You'd have had to have waited in the foyer until the meal and speeches were over Grin

What arses they've been though, not inviting you to the main event. There's nothing like being treated as a space-filler/bum on seat.

ProudBadMum · 20/07/2017 18:10

I have never heard of this. It's a ceremony invite or after party invite.

Those invited to ceremony stay.

None of this separate shite

SweetChickadee · 20/07/2017 18:10

WTF? Since when were people invited to the ceremony and not the whole reception?

DontTouchTheMoustache · 20/07/2017 18:11

Are you sure you definitely don't go to the meal? Might be worth double checking? Perhaps it's just oddly worded? clutches at straws

Paintbox · 20/07/2017 18:11

I have never heard of that, very rude imo. You should have been invited to the whole thing or just the evening do