To think that after 3 monkeys bumped their heads, the doctor should just ring social services?

[Soubriquet]

I mean come on, he says no more monkeys jumping on the bed and the mummy still keeps calling the doctor?

Surely she must be an irresponsible parent to let all 5 of her children jump on the bed and hurt themselves?

Dd is watching the bloody nursery rhyme program again

It's clearly inadequate supervision at least!

Her kids, her rules Hun. Shrugs shoulders, peels banana.

My autistic DD was obsessed with that rhyme a year or so ago. She found a version on YouTube with 55 little monkeys 😭

@brokenshoes 55 monkeys!!

brokenshoes 55 monkeys??? My head would be turned

55 monkeys?!

Jeez that's a lot of sex!

I would say go and get the snip after 9 at least

Where are those monkeys living? You can't get a GP to make house calls for love nor money here.

My 3 year old adores that rhyme and adds it to everything.

He falls off the sofa? --> "and the Dr says no more falling off the sofa"

He walks into a wall? --> "and the Dr says no more walking into the wall"

I often change some of the verses to "daddy called the doctor", just to divide the blame up a bit more...

Is this a coded thread about Theresa, Jeremy and Tim?

What happened after Jack and Jill went up the hill?

Were there repercussions?

What happened after Jack and Jill went up the hill?

Were there repercussions?*

And when Humpty fell off the wall....?

Yes, indeed. 55 bloody monkeys. The video lasted about 15 minutes. I was mightily pleased when DD moved on from that particular obsession.

What the fuck is wind the bobbin about. One of you must know.

And why is mummy calling the doctor for a bumped head?! She can't be that concerned or she'd stop the others bouncing on the bed.

Oh, and never, never make the mistake of inventing your own version eg 2 little munchkins getting in the bath... Yes it got the 3 year old to actually get in the bath and wash without an argument for a change. But he then insisted every action needed it's own verse! I realised a tantrum was actually less soul destroying.

Ahhh one of my first parenting discoveries was never start a number rhyme higher than 5.

10 little ducks go swimming one day? Not round here they don't - we're still missing five. Social services don't seem concerned despite the rise in hoisin sauce and pancake wrap sales.....

Birds-i think a bobbin is a cotton reel?

Thanks sno but what about point to the ceiling point to the floor what does all that mean. At least the monkeys make sense.

What the fuck is wind the bobbin about. One of you must know. Yes a bobbin is the bit the cotton sits on in a sewing machine.

They're obviously shit at winding it - otherwise why do they keep having to do it. Must be dropping it with all that pointing and clapping hoo haa.

I want to know how high the wall that Mr Dumpty sat on was. Maybe that could put a top on to discourage sitting?

And I won't mention the rumour that the Duke of York has had 10,000 men!

As an aside, I've used that song teaching subtraction in class. We've varied it and definitely had lots of animated 'monkeys' who love bouncing up and down.!!

I think the bobbin winding is a cheery work song for child labourers!

Realistically the doctor's shit anyway. He doesn't seem to do anything medical, he just tells them not to do it again. What kind of training did he do?