To think that after 3 monkeys bumped their heads, the doctor should just ring social services?

[Soubriquet]

I mean come on, he says no more monkeys jumping on the bed and the mummy still keeps calling the doctor?

Surely she must be an irresponsible parent to let all 5 of her children jump on the bed and hurt themselves?

Dd is watching the bloody nursery rhyme program again

Realistically the doctor's shit anyway. He doesn't seem to do anything medical, he just tells them not to do it again.

🎵 Mummy called the doctor and the doctor said... "Monitor for signs of concussion and call 111 if you have any concerns" 🎵

Whatever happened to proper bedtimes? The kids all seem to be skipping their supper and going out for a street party in the moonlight. Is it because the moon is unusually bright that they can't sleep? The noise is driving me crazy.

rightwhine i am being paid by powerful steel lobbyists to subtly promote the industry's interests on mumsnet. Don't tell anyone!

The landlord of The Eagle should have had his license removed for allowing the poor weasel to be popped and the monkey to be knocked off the table with a stick. Poor little buggers. Not to mention needing reporting to Environmental Health for allowing weasels into the pub and letting monkeys wander about on the tables. I wouldn't want to dip into the complementary peanuts at the bar in that place I can tell you.

oh dear we have the 1931 bridge at lake havasu

times have changed this bunny was ds fav

Little Bunny Foo Foo

Chorus:
Little bunny Foo Foo
Hopping through the forest
Scooping up the field mice
And bopping 'em on the head
And down came the Good Fairy
And she said
"Little bunny Foo Foo
I don't like you're attitude
Scooping up the field mice
And bopping 'em on the head"

I'll give you 3 chances.
Then I'll turn you into a goon!
The next day…
Chorus

Repeat two more verses with 2 and 1 chances

1. "I gave you two chances.

Now I'll turn you into a goon!" (POOF!) And the moral of the story is: Hare today, goon tomorrow!

The standards are terrible at The Eagle, More coffee, but you get what you pay for, after all.

I bloody love this thread.

Surely the parents of sleepy bunnies would be chased by the school and truancy officer for their children being later for school?

Also why the heck would you rock your boat on a stream with crocodiles?

Surely if you was going to bath a turtle you would remove the soap..but then why bath a turtle since they live in water anyway?

Shouldn't it be bath a tortoise?

Row, row, row your boat
Gently to the shore.
If you see a lion there
Don't forget to turn the boat around and start the outboard motor.

Is this the version where the doctor looks like Hitler?

Isn't the lady at Banbury Cross Queen Elizabeth I?

Oh god, forfuck, Monkey Hitler has traumatised me.

Ring a ring a roses
A pocket full of Pirinase

errr that's it...

We didn't have sleepy bunnies where I was from.

When I heard it being sung after we moved, I ended up changing the words "they're so still, are they ill" to "still in bed, are they dead"

There's probably a reason why I didn't fit in at the toddler groups.

I would like MN to take under consideration the poor maid , clearly the inspiration for the Handmaids Tale,who was forced to hang out soaking wet clothes while being constantly attacked by ferocious birds. Not only was she attacked but her cruel employer attempted to feed her raw carrion while she herself feasted on artisan bread hand crafted by master bakers and spread with manuka honey harvested from the sun filled meadows of lower alpine slopes. It appears highly probable that the King also called the Handmaid into the parlour so that she could be forced to watch him count his money in an act of extreme sexual deviancy.

My DP said the other day that 5 little ducks is like a horror story (till they come back of course)

That Johnny is a liar too he was definitely eating the sugar!

hilarious

Forfuckssake - I literally just logged in so I could mention the scary hitler monkey doctor (and the sinister ha ha ha ha between verses in that one).
Also to say my favorite nursery rhyme is Lucy Locket lost her pocket because it's about two actual prostitutes in the 18th Century what had a falling out over a client (pocket)

The Eagle still exists. On the City road you go up and down. But clearly no weasels any more

I've always thought the sleeping bunnies was about an interfering mil. The mum has just got the bunnies off to sleep and is slumped exhausted in a chair when in comes interfering mil worried that they're too still so shouts at them to hop about. Exhausted mum then has to get them to sleep again.... If only she was using Gina ford....

Noone mentioned the cannibalistic tendency of the little piggy eating roast beef yet?

Some of these questions are so well thought out, I can't add any.

However, if anyone is interested in this stuff I came along the following during my lit review for dissertation. I love them and have continued to be interested in their work.
blogs.bodleian.ox.ac.uk/archivesandmanuscripts/2017/03/07/opie-archive/

gin cannibalistic? Pigs? Beef? What?