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To tell neighbour no?

213 replies

TheRugbyValkyrie · 12/06/2017 01:22

My neighbour popped round at about 12:45 today to ask us to turn the music off. I told him no.
Background - my 20 year old DS popped to the shop for me before going to meet friends. When he got back he pulled up outside, left the engine running and music on. When he opened the door I could hear his music. As he was in a rush, I helped him sort out a packed lunch. We has just finished when there was a knock on the front door. I opened it (and could once again hear the music) and it was my neighbour. He asked me to turn the music off or down. I said no, that it was the middle of the day and you couldn't hear the music inside or only faintly if the windows were open. He got quite huffy, said that it was too loud and he was only asking politely.
While this was going on DS had gone out the back door and was going back to his car, total time at home, less than 10 minutes.
I said to him that his wife had previously complained (in the middle of the afternoon) and that I said the same thing to her. It was the middle of the day and they were BU.
I know my response has been influenced by the fact that the guy does all his loud gardening jobs on a Sunday afternoon, which drives me up the wall, but I don't say anything. Oh and he always parks in my parking spot.
Was I BU to tell him to stuff his request?

OP posts:
BeautyQueenFromMars · 13/06/2017 20:21

I'm a bit worried by the distinct lack of reading comprehension displayed by a large proportion of the posters on this thread...

Chickoletta · 13/06/2017 20:37

Antisocial, dickish behaviour from both you and your son.

NotYoda · 13/06/2017 20:45


Oh, you assume they've read the stuff

Yellowbird54321 · 13/06/2017 20:47

Cancel the cheque!

CheeseQueen · 13/06/2017 20:55

I have RTFT - was just replying to the bit that was addressed to me Smile

AwaywiththePixies27 · 13/06/2017 21:07

Is mowing your garden on a Sunday afternoon considered a nuisance now?

Shit that means I get to yell at practically most of my street then Grin

You can't really compare gardening activity to constant music blaring, and why in the name of all the saints is he parking 100metres away? Confused

Delilah21D00LoT · 13/06/2017 21:26

"I said no, that it was the middle of the day and you couldn't hear the music inside or only faintly if the windows were open. He got quite huffy, said that it was too loud and he was only asking politely."

But clearly he could hear the music and must have been louder than 'faintly' otherwise he'd not have come around. Maybe you are unaware of how loud the music actually is?
I'm sure it wouldn't be a problem to turn your music down a bit - really.

LauderSyme · 13/06/2017 21:30

You refused to turn down music that no one was listening to but that was disturbing the one person who could hear it then ask AIBU?


Glad to read your update OP, I think that's a good response from you. I hope you find a way to mend fences, I'm sure an apology would go a long way.

I'm afraid you and your family have allowed yourselves to be incredibly inconsiderate neighbours. Other posters have expressed just how most vividly.

To those of you (SoupDragon et al) pointing out the OP's reconsideration and remorse, and urging people to RTFT...

Actually I think it might be rather good for Valkyrie to read the dominant opinion here, and several more pages may give her the chance to fully absorb it Wink

Mumoftwoandover · 13/06/2017 22:39

Yes !!! YABVU !
Respect your neighbours!
I have such a nightmare neighbour like that, that whenever I think I will have a restfull quiet day he will be there with his stupid music on the loudest volume as possible, and even worst is that his taste for music is horrible !!!

So please try to learn some manners and teach them to your son too !

AtHomeDadGlos · 13/06/2017 23:01

Neighbour should've just taken the keys and tossed them under the car. That would've solved the problem.

fuckwitery · 13/06/2017 23:15

YABVU. Jesus wept. No wonder your DS has no idea what's neighbourly behaviour.

user1489675144 · 13/06/2017 23:34


I am amazed that you had to ask.

Hopefully the neighbour will remove car keys and drop down nearest drain next time car engine left running, polluting environment with no driver present. A second to switch engine off and take key out. Lazy and stupid.

Ceto · 14/06/2017 00:27

Please, please people, RTFT. Or just the OPs posts. What on earth is the point in ranting on about how unreasonable she is when she acknowledged it ages ago and has sorted it out?

PidgeonSpray · 14/06/2017 01:24

How did the apology go OP?

Sid98 · 14/06/2017 01:35

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

FrancisCrawford · 14/06/2017 07:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

manicmij · 14/06/2017 10:22

Your son left car with engine running!!!! For ten minutes???? He has committed a massive dangerous motoring offence doing that alone without even considering the noise issue. You seem to be very defensive of anything that happens due to your household but unaccepting of anyone else's actions.

Ceto · 14/06/2017 10:25

manicmj, try reading the thread before saying OP is unaccepting?

And maybe you should cancel the cheque.

GabsAlot · 14/06/2017 11:10

i know th op is aplogising just to say your ds leaving kys in ignition will invalidate his insurance

Jeanneweany · 14/06/2017 13:55

Your son is 20 and they do daft things. But everyone has to be considerate. Wtf sorry what am i saying. Cut the plugs of the ndn gardening equipment. What a twat Grin

Jeanneweany · 14/06/2017 13:58

Ps so sick of mn police wanking on about reading threads. Not if there are thousands of responses. Who else reads the initial post then a few replies. Then all the further posts from person plus a few replies? Then ignores the other 9800 posts??? Or am i a slow reader?

Abra1d · 14/06/2017 14:01

I don't wouldn't let my two do this. The engine off. Radio off.

Whatsername17 · 14/06/2017 14:01

Antisocial behaviour doesn't only occur between 11pm and 6am. Ywbvu

SoupDragon · 14/06/2017 14:32

Not if there are thousands of responses

There are rarely thousands of responses from the OP. Just reading those will give you an idea whether they've admitted they were unreasonable. It's really not hard.

Actually, there can never ever be thousands of responses at all.

NotYoda · 14/06/2017 15:55


Then you run the risk of saying things that are totally redundant. Or asking questions that have already been asked, or making assumptions that are already proved to be wrong.

And why should anyone listen to you when you can't be arsed to listen to them?

Just at least read the OP's highlighted posts

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