Neighbour in garden.

[Buddinghell]

More of a rant.
We live in a row of new build terraces. Tiny gardens. So everyone can see most your garden from an upstairs window and everyone can hear everything if they are in the garden. We do try and give each other a bit of privacy. Someone has friends over in the garden we don't mow the tiny patch of grass. I won't be putting my washing up if I hear next door having breakfast outside.
All except my neighbour who is outside every time I am, doing sodding "jobs". The fence is rattling as I speak as she puts on a second coat that's flicking through the fence over my plants . I've had to come in from reading my book.
The annoying bit is that she doesn't work and I do. So I can only be in the garden weekends whereas she could be do stuff all week. She was in B& Q on bank holiday Monday moaning how busy it was too, duh, do you think?
I think she feels gardening is something you do at the weekends and garden centres are for bank holidays. So AIBU in being stressed with this.

It is her garden. This is your issue.

Yes yabu. You can't restrict other people's use of their own gardens. You must have known that you would see/hear your neighbours when you bought a terrace with overlooked garden.

If you want to play hide and seek with your neighbours, it's up to you.

Most normal people realise they could spend 24 hours a day in their own garden without having to give their neighbours a second thought.

Higher fence? A few high bushes? Can you somehow create more privacy?

This would do my head in if I had no privacy in my own garden.

She can do what she wants in her garden at any time. It's odd that you'd expect her to stop doing what she wants because you're there. If you want complete privacy in your garden then buy somewhere that isn't overlooked.

Theres always one neighbour that doesn't 'play ball', and yes it's really annoying. Don't think you can do much about it, as it's her garden. Understand your rant though. Maybe try to just ignore what's happening around you, so that you can enjoy your garden.

YABU. It's her garden, she can use it whenever she wants.
I thought you were going to say something about noisy parties, but the poor woman is gardening!

Yabu to come in when a neighbour is out. Why not make conversation instead?

Perhaps it is weather related. It is all very well saying she can garden when you are at work but A) Why should she? B) Maybe she wants to do her gardening when the weather is good, which includes weekends. I don't really see how you can expect her to tiptoe around your schedule. YABU I'm afraid.

What? This is madness. I am imagining Pauline from number 6 attempting to put her washing out then cringing with embarrassment as she realises that she has encroached on Keith from number 8's yoga and rushing back in red faced. God forbid any of you use your gardens at the same time!

Ludicrous.

So what if she doesn't work and you do. Working doesn't mean no-one else should be in their garden/b &q at weekends except working people.
It's her garden so she can be in it whenever she likes.

Only issue you should bring up with the neighbour is paint getting on your plants/garden.

I've even been known to talk to my neighbour through the fence as we both hang out washing at the same time!!

no, thats far too silly, just start using your garden whenever you need to. I bet most of this consideration is just you anyway, and everyone else is just living their lives.

Are you sure she doesn't work? Maybe she works from home and structures her week like a typical working week? Or uses the weekdays to do housework or something else? Either way, it's none of your business when she uses her garden.

This sounds ridiculous! Why wouldn't you hang washing out while your neighbours have breakfast in their garden?!
I have a garden, I go in and out of it exactly as I please - as it should be.

Why on earth won't you put your washing out if someone else is in their garden? YABU and a bit barmy too.

You're wasting so much time and energy second-guessing what everyone is doing or thinking and mentally wondering why they're doing it when they are. Leave your poor neighbours to do their own thing and focus on your garden, not theirs.

I'm seething weirdly about this thread, OP. I think it is so rude and entitled that you believe you should be able to police when someone else goes outside on their own property. Really, what's going through your head?

The annoying bit is that she doesn't work and I do

How do you know she doesn't work? some people only can do things at the weekend. Like my DCs Dad who came to help me do the overgrown gardens today due to my ill health. He was working Bank Holiday Monday!

dementedpixie haven't you read the universal rules. You should ignore your neighbour at every possible point to enhance your antisocialness.

This cant be serious. Its her garden she can use it whenever you wants, likewise you can use your garden whenever you want. Yabvvvu and slightly strange.

Eh? People really dodge each other like this. It sounds exhausting. Do your stuff let her do hers. Nod and smile at each other or say a few words. Easy peasy.

Why does everyone assume I've bought this house? It's HA ( hers is purchased) so it was allocated.

We definitely do talk but because we basically live on top of each other we have pretend to ignore a lot of the time.

Of course she can do her garden whenever. I just find it odd she has to be busy when it's obvious everyone else is chilling in theirs. My neighbours the other side make more noise/ are out a lot but that's because it's unavoidable with children. That doesn't bother me. Why can't she just relax like the rest of us.

Jesus, OP, if gardening is enough for your neighbour to get on your nerves, there's very little hope, is there?

I think YABU. Unless a neighbour is doing my pet hates which are a) mowing before 9am on a Sunday and b) blasting shit music from a stereo they've put outside, they can do what they like.

I don't think it's her that needs to learn to relax OP! She's painting her garden fence. She's not dancing around her garden butt naked to Iron Maiden.