Mil let baby get sunburnt

[sunburntbaby]

I really don't know how to deal with this....

I'm on maternity leave looking after my 9mo. My mil had asked to have the baby alone once a week so we recently started doing that for an afternoon once a week. Yesterday was very hot, so hot I had to sit in the shade. Well....mil had him out in the sun and he's bloody sunburnt. Arms, face and neck. She said they were sitting out most of the afternoon (!!!) Aibu to think she should have had him in the shade?
Other more minor things include on 3 occasions in the past leaving him in a dirty Nappy and not putting him down for his nap (I'm assuming she doesn't want to cut into her time with him).
I think I will really struggle to trust her with him now. Surely it's common sense not to have a baby in the sun?
My dh is going to speak to her as he's pretty upset too.

That's ridiculous. Is he burnt or does he have tan lines?

I wouldn't be concerned about the nap but the other issues are unacceptable and I'd be very annoyed.

Sounds like your DH will speak to her and sort it. So you don't need to deal with it.

I wouldn't be happy but a quick chat should sort it out.

As a one off accident, I think it is forgivable as long as she is more vigilant in the future.

As a careless act which is repeated, I wouldn't entrust her to look after your child.

Also send her off with a UV umbrella for shade and sun cream plus hat.

Where are you it was hot yesterday

The not putting him down for a nap wouldn't bother me at all, but the not changing the dirty nappy would and the sunburn would have me seething.
If you have a child outside they need be sun creamed up and find them some shade, ds at that age had a blanket/toys with umbrella over it.

I think when your dh speaks to her he needs to say for now at least she will only see the child when you or he take them for a visit

If he's genuinely burnt I'd stop her having him on her own. Also really not acceptable to leave a baby in a dirty nappy.
Hope he's ok and do get medical advice if you're worried

I am assuming not UK?

kitten it's properly red

sparkling it's more about whether we should continue with these wee jollies to be honest. I feel like she doesn't listen to me, e.g. Ignoring me asking her to put him down for his nap. I could have overlooked that I suppose but I'm so angry that he's burnt.

eat he did have all of the

It was warm in Scotland yesterday. Provide suncream and tell her to keep him in the shade

Pressed to soon

He had all of that stuff available and they were at my house so umbrella could have been put up or gone inside.

I had washing out and everything!

Fuck that! You were uncomfortable from the beginning - other relatives parents/in laws don't have a god given right to have your child so just say no. Only ever do things you are comfortable with.

Sunburn I'd be really cross in that case. Hope your son is feeling okay :(

why do these grandmothers assume it's their right to have the children by themselves?

she now needs to earn this right again...

Oh good God. How stupid can people be. His poor skin. How is he today. Have you put after sun on him

Totally unacceptable, pay for proper childcare if you need it. Granny doesn't gave a right to baby one day a week. Absolutely scorching in Wales yesterday! I was in my bikini in the garden with spf50.

I got a little bit of badly needed colour yesterday so yes the sun was strong here.
That's quite irresponsible of your mil and I think you should educate her re sun protection.

Scorching? Bikini?

FFS - that's insane!
Is she sorry? Does she understand how appalling that is?

What an idiot. My DC are 5 and 8, i would never let them out without suncream if the weather is hot. It's common sense! Unfortunately i see it a lot though, my DC friends come over or come out with us, even my nieces and nephews. Never any sun protection. Madness!

Someone will come on soon snd tell you back in the day no one used suncream as some mumsnetters assume all mils are 80+. I

I am a 50 year old mil and GM and always used sun cream on my kids

Op I would be mortified if I was your mil. If she's not then that would be my red flag.

My advice is see how she reacts to your dh telling her about the sunburn. If she neither noticed it or plays it down as unimportant I would cut the unsupervised time as she's not ready for the responsibility.

Not changing dirty nappies would be enough for me to stop it! Cannot abide people being casual about dirty nappies it's so bloody disrespectful. Wonder if she'd be happy with an elderly person in a nursing home being left sat in their own shit.

The sunburn incident is a good excuse to stop the arrangement I reckon. I wouldn't be happy with it.

Also, especially if it was sunny, she really should have used suncream and shade...

my worst sunburn ever was when i was 8 years old and spent the day in a swimming pool/water park abroad and it was overcast... my parents (and me) didn't think to reapply as it wasn't open sun...

If it's a mistake, fair enuff ( I burnt one if my kids once by falling asleep with them under a tree and the sun moved round). If you feel she is really just being negligent all the time then that's a different matter.

Tiny errrr some grandmothers like me save their kids thousands on child care costs by minding their grandchildren. I have my dgc 3 days a week to help out.

Most are not wierd child snatchers you know please don't generalise there it's a tad stupid.