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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to think my 5 year old is ahead academically?

225 replies

hollyvsivy · 27/04/2017 23:04

I'm not posting to boast and my daughters happiness is far more important to me than her academic progress. This is why I found it frustrating that at parents evening tonight her teacher told me she's working at around the same level as most children her age, because my DD is thoroughly bored at school. She has just turned 5 and is in reception.

She's on stage 5 reading books at school but can read stage 6 at home. Her real strength is in maths, though. She can read up to six figure numbers. She can add numbers in their thousands. She understands and can do short multiplication (discovered when she joined in with her big sisters homework.) She knows some times tables and can easily halve and double numbers in her head. She will often sit and write numbers correctly formed and in the correct order to 200+. Then she brings home homework which questions like 4-2 so I just don't understand how her teacher can say she's average when she could've done the current homework years ago.

Of course I don't want to be pushy at 5, but equally I don't want her to be bored and lose enthusiasm for numbers in particular. AIBU to think her teacher is selling her short? I've seem her workbooks at school and know she's independently writing big sums at school so her teacher has definitely seen she can do it and that I'm not a fantasist!

OP posts:

Helloitsme88 · 27/04/2017 23:08

What are her social and life skills like?

dinosaursandtea · 27/04/2017 23:10

Helloitsme88 What does that have to do with it? The OP is explicitly talking about her daughter's academic progress and wondering how to support her.

newtlover · 27/04/2017 23:10

big sums eh?

dinosaursandtea · 27/04/2017 23:11

OP, if it's something your daughter is finding fun and enjoyable, maybe get some slightly more advanced workbooks and let her mess around? There are bound to be loads of cool STEM toys that will stimulate her learning - I know there are things for that age group that teach them the basics of coding for example.

Helloitsme88 · 27/04/2017 23:12

Because school isn't just about maths. It's social skills and interacting with peers. So to say her daughter at 5, is bored at school, is worrying. Especially in reception which is a largely, play based curriculum

TheWitTank · 27/04/2017 23:12

Did you tell the teacher what stage you think she is at? What was her reply?

OwlinaTree · 27/04/2017 23:12

What did the teacher say when you told him/her what your dd can do?

Forgettheworld · 27/04/2017 23:13

My sons almost 5 and can only just write his name. The teachers tell me he's at the right level, go figure!

BarbarianMum · 27/04/2017 23:13

The point of reception is that the children learn through play. She's not sitting there for hours with a worksheet that's too easy. Does she not enjoy role play, art, construction or physical activity at all? Very unusual for a reception child to be bored however academic (Y1 is more of a challenge in that respect).

If numbers are her thing then you could ask the school for some extension work involving those but it should be very easy for her to just work with bigger numbers, calculate bigger no. bonds etc with minimal input.

Lepetitmarsellais · 27/04/2017 23:16

Stage 5 ORT? That's bright but not exceptional for summer term reception I'd say. Her maths does sound ahead though.

I would be concerned about her feeling bored though. Like a pp says it's a play based curriculum, they shouldn't be finding it boring.

BlackeyedSusan · 27/04/2017 23:17

children need to be able to work at their level and are entitled to learn in all areas of the curriculum. so what if she is for example struggling to hold a pencil and can do complex maths in ther head... she should get support with both.

try nrich.maths.org/

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 27/04/2017 23:17

Oh I can well believe 100% what you say. My dds friend was reading at not even 3 and I don't mean reading as in recognising the shapes of the words I mean full on reading. However she can't read any better than anyone else her age.
About your dd. The teacher can only go by what she sees for herself. They wouldn't lie. Legally they can't. Also children aren't always their true selves when they're not at home.
Did you in a nice way challenge the teacher and put your argument forward.
Just like they can't give a parent false hope.
Eg a teacher can't say about little Billy's who struggles in numeracy.
Oh Mr and Mrs/Mr/Miss...... Billy has the skills to be the chancellor in the future.

Jakeyboy1 · 27/04/2017 23:17

She probably is ahead academically. Certainly in maths anyway. Ask how they deal with more able students who excel in an area. Yes reception has a lot of play but they are also carefully monitored (or should be) and our school splits into more able/less able groups after the first term so they should be making provision for this.

DorisMcSweeney · 27/04/2017 23:18

Yoor 5 year old sounds more academically advanced than my 14 year old. Although can she get hold of cigarettes and siphon off her dad's vodka? It's all about learning life skills.

Waddlelikeapenguin · 27/04/2017 23:18

I can't comment on school as we HE but my 5 yr old can do all the maths you describe so I don't think it's unusual. (All "big" sums are really just small sums once you understand place value anyway)
He's teaching himself to read at the moment so I can't comment on that/have no idea what the levels mean.

Original poster

hollyvsivy · 27/04/2017 23:18

Hello it's me she is autistic so her social skills aren't great. She'd rather sit alone writing numbers. The fact she's bored is exacerbating her difficulties.

OP posts:

dinosaursandtea · 27/04/2017 23:18

Helloitsme88 But kids who are ahead do get bored in lessons! Most of the primary English lessons I had were a total waste of time because I was much further ahead of the other kids, so I tuned out, withdrew and was miserable. If I'd been stimulated and interested, even if I was reading something different from the rest of the class, I'd have felt much more engaged socially.

Maybe the OP's daughter is a bit ahead of her peers and they'll catch her up. Maybe she's actually gifted. But there's nothing wrong with wanting to make sure she's actually learning at her own pace and not just re-treading the same old stuff.

Pentapus · 27/04/2017 23:19

She sounds very bright OP. I'd tell the school what she can do and ask if it's possible for them to give her something a bit more challenging.

BertrandRussell · 27/04/2017 23:19

Why do you think she is bored?

SnickersWasAHorse · 27/04/2017 23:19

There is a lot more to maths than just numbers. She might be amazing with numbers but just average with shape.

Also, sounds like a stupid question but does she understand the value of the numbers? Does she know that 67 marbles will take up more room than 30 marbles for example or is she just able to recite numbers and number facts?

TheWitTank · 27/04/2017 23:19

Ah, that's a totally different situation then

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 27/04/2017 23:19

Autistic children are always exceptionally intelligent

Crowdblundering · 27/04/2017 23:20

Massive piece of info missed on the OP there OP!

That she's autistic!

OkPedro · 27/04/2017 23:20

Same as my 5 year old ds forget

I'm not in the uk but I assumed Reception is just another year of Pre school? Not many schools here have reception. Most children start school at 5. They do jolly phonics after Christmas. And start blending sounds soon after. No pressure and all the children can progress at their own rate.. Seems to be little room for boredom

Original poster

hollyvsivy · 27/04/2017 23:20

I agree Waddle about big sums just being small sums really and DD gets that, whereas her ten yo sister (who is exceeding in most areas) struggles to get her head around it. I don't get how that makes 5 yo average.

OP posts:

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