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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Family no longer coming to stay (head lice-related)

302 replies

boobashka · 30/12/2016 13:03

My brother and his family are in the UK for the holidays staying with my parents (2hours away). Since October the plan has been that they will come to ours for 3 days over New Year. So I have filled the fridge, booked a meal out, and in the last couple of days cleaned house from top to bottom and organised beds and bedding for everyone - 11 people including my other DB. I discovered head lice in myself and DD yesterday - promptly treated with Full Marks and thorough combing with the fine tooth nit comb. Now my brother and his wife no longer want to come here to stay in case their two DC (age 4 and 2) contract nits.
AIBU to be think that their decision is super selfish? My mum has been on the phone in tears (first time all her grandchildren were to be together) and my two DC are upset to not be spending time with their little cousins.

OP posts:
Ilovecaindingle · 30/12/2016 13:06

Why did you tell them??!

IfartInYourGeneralDirection · 30/12/2016 13:07

God it's just head lice not the bloody plague

Yanbu they are being utterly ridiculous.

Reality16 · 30/12/2016 13:07

While family need to get a grip, you included I'm afaraid. Why would you even broadcast it? Treat it and carry on with your life Confused

WorraLiberty · 30/12/2016 13:08

YANBU, what a massive over reaction.

I can only assume that as their kids are so young, they know very little about this sort of thing?

Could you send them some links to read?

Original poster
boobashka · 30/12/2016 13:10

DH thought we should let them know as it was the 'right' thing to do. Regretting that. Both my brother and his wife are doctors so they think they know everything re health issues. Apparently we are still infectious up to a week after applying the chemicals...

OP posts:
Footinmouthasusual · 30/12/2016 13:11

They sound insane. Tell them to look up treatment etc on the internet. Good grief what will they do when their precious little snowflakes get them as soon as they start school. Your poor mum too.

Footinmouthasusual · 30/12/2016 13:13

Just seen your post. They need retraining then as that's bollocks. You should treat the whole family maybe just in case but after one treatment and a bit comb they are dead.

Original poster
boobashka · 30/12/2016 13:13

They are worried about undertaking a long haul flight with young children with nits (when they go back home) and don't want to "take the risk" Shock

OP posts:
OohhThatsMe · 30/12/2016 13:15

But nits are not an infection! You can't be 'infectious' after you've killed them.

Original poster
boobashka · 30/12/2016 13:15

I've had one annoying phone call from my brother last night announcing their decision. No follow up text to apologise or anything. I feel really hurt by the whole thing.

OP posts:
Christmassnake · 30/12/2016 13:16

I would say they are using that as an excuse to not come

VeryBitchyRestingFace · 30/12/2016 13:17

I wouldn't have told them. Who would have known nits could have such a violent, avoidant effect on relies though, eh? Flowers

Maybe this thread should be pinned at the top of the page for posters who are looking for ways to put off family members from visiting them.

MaureenMLove · 30/12/2016 13:17

Gosh yes! I'd be worried about a long haul flight with a child it's nits too! Bit like snakes on a plane!Confused

Utterly bonkers, precious and neurotic behaviour!

Original poster
boobashka · 30/12/2016 13:17

Yes, Christmas that's what I'm beginning to think Sad

OP posts:
JakeBallardswife · 30/12/2016 13:18

Crikey, it's only nits. They're mad. I'm so sorry they're not coming .

ovenchips · 30/12/2016 13:18

Seems like a crazy reason to me but you can't make them come if they don't want to, even for reasons that don't actually make sense to others! Tell them by all means that they don't need to stay away but you can't force them to understand this.

I would redirect your mum's telephone conversation and upset to them too as the decision not to come is all theirs.

But all your preparation and plans will still come good for your other house guests. Sounds like it's going to be lovely - hope you have a great time.

Fartleks · 30/12/2016 13:18

Your brother and sil are utterly bonkers. Were they looking for a small excuse not to come?

Farmmummy · 30/12/2016 13:21

Ah these must be the new type the giant child eating nits! Of course you should immediately quarantine your whole house indeed your street Xmas Confused

wifeyhun · 30/12/2016 13:22

I think this is the most ridiculous post I have ever read. Is your brother for real?

I think my dd had nits for a whole summer once they were impossible to get rid of.

Hope he comes to his senses and you have your get together.

Original poster
boobashka · 30/12/2016 13:23

ovenchips unfortunately mum, dad and my other DB won't be coming now either as they're all staying at my parents' house. So all our plans are for nought....
Thanks for the nice replies everyone Smile

OP posts:
fluffiphlox · 30/12/2016 13:23

Well I'm in my late fifties and never had nits. I, too, might think twice about visiting.

Gymnopedies · 30/12/2016 13:24

If you wash your hair with vinegar, it's supposed to unglue the eggs from the hair so you should technically be nit free.
Are they medical doctor? It seems a bit over the top to cancel visit completely. I have stayed with family who had nits last summer and we didn't even catch them (plus I managed to shift them from my sister's head with haircut and alcohol vinegar when they had tried all the commercial product without success).

KingJoffreysRestingCuntface · 30/12/2016 13:24

Why do families tell each other every little personal thing?

I'd have kept it to myself.

luckylavender · 30/12/2016 13:24

To be fair when my DS was that age I would have stayed away too. Sad for you.

VanellopeVonSchweetz99 · 30/12/2016 13:25

Drama queens. I hope they all get worms in the bum.

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