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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Family no longer coming to stay (head lice-related)

302 replies

boobashka · 30/12/2016 13:03

My brother and his family are in the UK for the holidays staying with my parents (2hours away). Since October the plan has been that they will come to ours for 3 days over New Year. So I have filled the fridge, booked a meal out, and in the last couple of days cleaned house from top to bottom and organised beds and bedding for everyone - 11 people including my other DB. I discovered head lice in myself and DD yesterday - promptly treated with Full Marks and thorough combing with the fine tooth nit comb. Now my brother and his wife no longer want to come here to stay in case their two DC (age 4 and 2) contract nits.
AIBU to be think that their decision is super selfish? My mum has been on the phone in tears (first time all her grandchildren were to be together) and my two DC are upset to not be spending time with their little cousins.

OP posts:
Fartleks · 30/12/2016 13:25

Honestly, who on earth cancels due to nits?! Treated nits at that.

Do they have issues around that sort of thing? Is it part of a bigger picture?

I would probably text him saying 'we will miss seeing you, sil and neices/nephews over the new year. Have all the beds, food, house ready. Kids hair treated also. If you change your mind, do buzz'

Then redirect your mums energy towards your brother!

Spam88 · 30/12/2016 13:27

This is completely mad Confused it's not like getting head lice would be the end of the world, and hair can be tied up etc to reduce the chances (that's assuming that your treatment hasn't done the job of course which it probably has).

pinkblink · 30/12/2016 13:27

Il come and eat all your nice food I'm not scared of nits Grin

KingJoffreysRestingCuntface · 30/12/2016 13:28

To be fair it sounds like you dodged a bullet. They sound a bit oversensitive.

They may have spent the visit being weird and demanding and driving you nuts.

RandomMess · 30/12/2016 13:30

I'd be tempted to travel and go and visit your parents anyway Wink

Original poster
boobashka · 30/12/2016 13:30

Grin pinkblink We've tried to invite friends rounds (worst invite ever - "do come over, our family have cancelled on us and we have nits...") but everyone already has plans (or say they do anyway! Wink)

OP posts:
SaucyJack · 30/12/2016 13:31

Can't they just wear swimming hats if it's such an issue?

Utterly fucking bonkers.

mscongeniality · 30/12/2016 13:31

Way way over the top reaction! I could understand if it was just a casual visit and they lived close by. But they hardly see you and they're letting some lice prevent a reunion? I would be very upset but I would totally my brother he was being ridiculous. Not sure how your relationship with him is?

Original poster
boobashka · 30/12/2016 13:33

Our relationship is a bit strained ms. esp now!

OP posts:
Fartleks · 30/12/2016 13:33

Who would believe they are GP's. Utterly irrational.

happypoobum · 30/12/2016 13:33

Vanellope Grin

EweAreHere · 30/12/2016 13:35

Well, all you can do is sit back and wait for one of their little darlings to start school and eventually come home from school with nits or worms. Or laugh as they panic when a school parentmail comes through announcing nits/worms have been discovered on/in their little darling's classmate(s) and how parents should make sure to check their children. Do they think they'll have the option of not sending their child to school?

Hellochicken · 30/12/2016 13:37

Their reaction is completely OTT and it must be annoying to have prepared for the visit for them to cancel for this reason.

But I agree with pp sounds like they wanted an excuse not to come and now they can stay with rest of your family, so hasnt worked out that badly for them.

If they lived down the road and didnt want to call in this week I could understand, but having come all this way and such a longstanding plan I think they are utterly over the top by not visiting.

HateSummer · 30/12/2016 13:37

Why the hell would you tell people you have nits?! Goodness me. You need to capture your inner Hyacinth Bouquet and stop oversharing these types of things with people.

PurpleMinionMummy · 30/12/2016 13:39

How will they cope when nits go round their kids classes Confused

KingJoffreysRestingCuntface · 30/12/2016 13:39

Offer them bandanas soaked in Dettol??

That'll repel them.

StoneRosesSallyCinnamon · 30/12/2016 13:40

I would think twice about visiting, I detest headlice. and they can be hard to rid of

user1471545174 · 30/12/2016 13:40

In fifties too and hardly anyone got them. Why does everyone get them now? Confused

icelollycraving · 30/12/2016 13:41

Before ds I wouldn't have fancied it. This would be my sister's reaction. Ds has chicken pox which came up on xmas day, we saw them for coffee on xmas eve for an hour. She was due to take some xmas presents to a relative but won't collect them as they are 'harbouring the virus'.

pinkblink · 30/12/2016 13:41

It's probably not the best invitation op, made me chuckle though

icelollycraving · 30/12/2016 13:42

The gift wrapped presents that is that have been in a bag for two weeks. Perhaps I should have double bagged them Xmas Grin

GreenTureen · 30/12/2016 13:42

It's nits not the bloody plague Hmm

They're being ridiculous.

Saffronesque · 30/12/2016 13:43

Adult nits cases exploding. Apparently one reason could be the rise of the selfie on social media, with people cramming their heads together for shots of themselves having fun

pipsqueak25 · 30/12/2016 13:44

the most worrying aspect to this that they are both supposed to be doctors, ummm, wouldn't want to be a patient tbh. sorry but have to agree this sounds like a lame excuse, i think you were right to warn them as some parents are super senstive about 'that' problem [ esp. those in the medical profession Grin], but this is really daft isn't it ?
and we have another dm in tears as a result of this selfish behaviour...

BuggersMuddle · 30/12/2016 13:45

Tbh OP I have never had them and am fairly squeamish about them so probably would've changed plans too. It all sounds a bit dramatic though.

A relative kept it to herself that her daughter had untreated nits and she had been on my knee. I was fuming (not at the DD obviously).

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