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AIBU?

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Original poster

To ask if you call your MIL 'Mum' ?

218 replies

thewavesofthesea · 02/07/2016 21:19

Just that really. I have noticed that my own mum and MIL called their MILs 'Mum' but I never have, and neither does my brother in law's wife. I kinda feel like I would like to; I have been with my husband for 14 years, married for 8, and she is very lovely, supportive and does a lot for us; I love her to bits. But I would not want to offend my own mum, who also does a lot for us etc. and don't want MIL to think I'm odd after all this time! Maybe I'm overthinking it......Wink

OP posts:
EatShitDerek · 02/07/2016 21:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Daffydil · 02/07/2016 21:20

God no. She's not my mum!

KingJoffreyLikesJaffaCakes · 02/07/2016 21:21

No. She's not my mum.

My exH wanted to start calling my parents mum and dad and it weirded me out. They weren't his parents, they were mine.

NavyAndWhite · 02/07/2016 21:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

2rebecca · 02/07/2016 21:22

No, it's an old fashioned and rather weird thing. I only had one mum.

StripeyDeckchair · 02/07/2016 21:22

I wouldn't, you only have one Mum & however well you get on with your MIL it's not the same relationship.

But then my ex MIL was the wicked witch from the west.

Reality · 02/07/2016 21:22

I do sometimes. She's properly lovely. Mostly I just call her by her name though.

LadyCallandraDaviot · 02/07/2016 21:22

My DH calls her by her first name, so it would be extra weird if I called her 'Mum'

BennyTheBall · 02/07/2016 21:22

No. That would be totally weird.

She's not my mum.

Moistly · 02/07/2016 21:23

God, no.

hidingwithwine · 02/07/2016 21:23

No, never. I have a mum of my own. She's DH's mum....

RatOnnaStick · 02/07/2016 21:24

No I call her by her name. Dh does the same with my mum.

AnneElliott · 02/07/2016 21:24

No, I call her by her name. Would be weird to call her mum, although DHs friend( who lived with them for 8 years) calls them mum and dad.

raviolidreaming · 02/07/2016 21:24

Nope. My MIL is ace, but she's not my mum.

ChoudeBruxelles · 02/07/2016 21:24

No. My mil spent a lot of time when we were first married calling herself mum eg she'd phone and say "hi it's mum". I just ignored it and used her actual name a lot.

CMOTDibbler · 02/07/2016 21:25

No, never. I know MIL called her MIL mum though

ChasedByBees · 02/07/2016 21:26

I do sometimes.

dun1urkin · 02/07/2016 21:26

My Mum used to call my Dad's parents Mum and Dad, but I think this might have been because my parents met in their mid-teens. I think it's quite old fashioned.
I call my MIL by her name, but I was in my mid-twenties when I first met her. And she's not my Mum, much to our mutual relief Grin

ShellyF · 02/07/2016 21:26

Nope

Nocabbageinmyeye · 02/07/2016 21:26

Nope but I think that may be an old fashioned/older generation thing anyway

SauvignonBlanche · 02/07/2016 21:28

No, I've only one Mum and may she RIP.
I love my MIL BTW.

Fuckthisforausername · 02/07/2016 21:28

I call her Grandma mostly...

BobbinThreadbare123 · 02/07/2016 21:28

A friend of mine does this. They make quite a prominent display of it on Facebook. Bit weird; her own mum is lovely.

I call mine by her name.I already have a mum.

ChimpyChops · 02/07/2016 21:29

No.

I got married just before the first christmas after my dad died and my birthday present from new ILs was labelled 'mum and dad'. I wept like a baby. Hadn't occurred to me to ever call them that. I think they were a bit offended when ex-H said I wouldn't be calling them mum and dad.

GnomeDePlume · 02/07/2016 21:29

No, as others have said, she isnt my mum.

I think it is part of being less deferential to an older generation simply because they are older.