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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To decide i won't be friends with people based on their energy

195 replies

MySordidCakeSecret · 15/12/2015 13:36

DP would say I am, but in the last yr or so i've become really aware of the energy that people give out.

Some people repel me like the same poles of a magnet. For example NDN from the day i met him I just felt a really bad buzz about him, and i'll be honest i havn't given him any time because i feel due to this we won't be friends (and other reasons)

There's a mum at school who we chat and she's nice all fine, but i know we could never be close friends because she has a different energy.

And then there's some people, in particular one of the dad's at school (before anyone starts this is not an attraction thing!) who has such a calming, positive energy i feel totally comfortable and can quite happily stand near him in comfortable happy silence.

OP posts:
Original poster
MySordidCakeSecret · 15/12/2015 13:37

do other people have this?

OP posts:
DonkeyOaty · 15/12/2015 13:45

Nope

MaidOfStars · 15/12/2015 13:45

Energy is the capacity of a system to emit light or heat, or to perform work.

So no.

Wink

Playing ball, I don't usually make long term judgments about people based on presumably subliminal minute cues of body language or regular language in chance meetings.

DonkeyOaty · 15/12/2015 13:46

Praps you're an empaf or something?

MojitoMollie · 15/12/2015 13:46

nope

i treat people on the way they treat me

Enjolrass · 15/12/2015 13:47

You don't give your neighbour the time of day because you thinks he has bad energy?

Yabu.

If you get to know people and simply don't like them enough to be close friends that's fine.

Writing people off because of your assumptions isn't ok.

Original poster
MySordidCakeSecret · 15/12/2015 13:48

what's an empaf? i've considered that i might be a spiritual person.. i am a wannabe hippy?

Seriously though i thought this was something a lot of people recognised.. positive and negative energy when you meet people, and when it's negative you just don't open up, i'm not rude or mean or anything i just find if someone has a positive energy i feel happy to be around them.

OP posts:
whois · 15/12/2015 13:49

Um, kinda - but I'd probably just interpret it as their general personality, body language, voice, actions, words etc rather than 'energy'.

Original poster
MySordidCakeSecret · 15/12/2015 13:49

You don't give your neighbour the time of day because you thinks he has bad energy?

He's a twat, it's an impression i gathered when i met him which over the past few months he has validated many times over! which tells me my instincts were right.

OP posts:
AliceScarlett · 15/12/2015 13:50

I don't know what you mean by energy?

Kennington · 15/12/2015 13:51

Really this is not pleasant
So someone who is having a bad day or is unwell doesn't get your time.
Sounds like your 'energy' is off rather than others.

Original poster
MySordidCakeSecret · 15/12/2015 13:51

ah just looked it up, an Aura!! that's exactly what i mean

OP posts:
AliceScarlett · 15/12/2015 13:52

Im assuming empaf is empath (an empathic person I think).

LittlestLightOnTheTree · 15/12/2015 13:52

How ridiculous! If it were true then all the 'bad energy' lot would never get anywhere, they would be forever avoided

MaidOfStars · 15/12/2015 13:52

i just find if someone has a positive energy i feel happy to be around them

How do people with "positive energy" act, such that you feel happy to be around them?

Calm, confident, smiley but not giddy, interested and interesting, and so on.

This is not "energy" - yes, that is rather hippy wannabe - it's just a personality type that you, and everyone, responds to.

Original poster
MySordidCakeSecret · 15/12/2015 13:53

So someone who is having a bad day or is unwell doesn't get your time.

No you've misunderstood, i'm an introvert, so social interaction takes a lot out of me, and i only have a small number of close friends.

When i say i don't give time i mean i won't over invest personal information and a big effort to socialise etc, i am always kind and friendly to people and always help people and offer to help if they need it i'm not a mean person.

OP posts:
AliceScarlett · 15/12/2015 13:53

Um Auras have no basis in reasonable logic.

MaidOfStars · 15/12/2015 13:54

Aura, energy, blah. They are all vague, hippy-dippy mile markers on the path to crystal healing and tea leaf reading Smile

Enjolrass · 15/12/2015 13:54

Actually my mil does this.

Energy has been the reason she warned dh from marrying me. We would have a short lived marriage and I would ruin his life post divorce.

We have been married for 13 years. She also told me I was giving out male energy when I was pregnant with dd. She was 100% sure she would be a boy and the sonographer was wrong. She then told me that I wouldn't have anymore kids as the maternal energy no longer surrounded me.

She told us not to start our business as it would ruin us with 2 years. The business plan had bad energy.

3 years later business is stronger than ever and we are more financially secure than ever.

Four weeks ago she gave me some drops that would 'sort my energy so I wasn't as negative and stop over reacting' .

Mil has fil, but very few friends as she writes people off.

More often that not her 'energy readings' are completely wrong.

Apparently gamma rays were going to cover the earth a few months ago, it would change our DNA.

I don't think I'll ever forgive her. I was promised super powers and it didn't happen! Grin

Original poster
MySordidCakeSecret · 15/12/2015 13:55

Aura, energy, blah. They are all vague, hippy-dippy mile markers on the path to crystal healing and tea leaf reading

Fair enough then! Grin

OP posts:
goodnightdarthvader1 · 15/12/2015 13:55

Maybe consult the crystals and see what they say.

MaidOfStars · 15/12/2015 13:56

I'm not denying the validity of your responses to people, OP. I'm just eye rolling at how you are framing them Wink

Original poster
MySordidCakeSecret · 15/12/2015 13:57

I didn't think i'd lost my mind but considering i think there's a ghost living upstairs in my house maybe i have! Crazy by the age of 23 wow.

OP posts:
DeltaZeta · 15/12/2015 13:57

So, are you picking up subtle vibes from people about the kind of character they are? Lots of people do this and if that's the case, I think that's fine. Most of us have met people we disliked or felt uneasy about based on very little interration.

Calling it their 'energy' or 'aura' makes you sound a bit wanky though.

Gruntfuttock · 15/12/2015 13:57

What I'd like to say is that describing people in terms of good and bad energy is a load of bollocks and completely meaningless, but I'm too polite.

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