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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

School reports on Facebook

173 replies

WaltJunior · 10/07/2015 20:03

I can't handle it! I'm not sure why I hate it so much I just cringe so badly
Aibu to think people should keep their child's report to themselves??

OP posts:

quesadillas · 10/07/2015 20:05

I don't like it either. But I don't share all that much stuff about my child. If he wants his life splashed across Facebook, he can do it himself when he's older. Until then, the very occasional photo or funny anecdote is all I put on there.

Outwith · 10/07/2015 20:08

Aw, people are just proud of their DC. I haven't actually don't this , even though it sounds like I have.

soapboxqueen · 10/07/2015 20:09

Not appropriate. I'm OK with close family etc reading ds's report but other than that,no. Certainly not saved to t'Internet for eternity.

Leeds2 · 10/07/2015 20:09

I would never do this, but I don't mind reading other people's. Thay all seem to be amazingly good!!

SantasLittleMonkeyButler · 10/07/2015 20:09

Do you mean posting the actual report (or carefully chosen paragraphs thereof) or just a "I'm so proud of my lil man, aced his report yet again" type thing?

I have no objection to people purely being proud of their children TBH. What I object to is comments such as "lil princess has had the best school report ever. Me being a stay at home mommy to give her the best start in life was obviously worth it!"

Basically anything that boasts about your own family whilst putting everyone else's down .

hanami · 10/07/2015 20:10

I have put one word of my daughter's report on Facebook because it made me laugh and laugh. It is like her teacher swallowed a thesaurus and then described me as a child (a sort of endearing but ultimately unflattering weakness). Hope I didn't make people cringe as I know the ones you mean - like Oscar speeches - "I am so proud of my wonderful children who have exceeded all categories of brilliance, blah, blah".

Sirzy · 10/07/2015 20:12

I have commented on DS report today. He is in reception, has a lot of issues which make learning tough for him but he has a report which is positive about his effort and his behaviour. So yes I am proud because things are challenging for him and he is trying hard.

Sirzy · 10/07/2015 20:13

Posted too soon - I am proud of him and want to share that pride with family and friends and that includes those on my Facebook. If people don't want to see it then they are free to hide hide/block/delete.

maggieryan · 10/07/2015 20:14

No its a pet hate of mine as well. "Well done to my beautiful talented baby" etc etc. I cringe and these are actual friends of mine..kind of turns me off them. Why oh why do you feel the need to boast about your children
Dreadful

Glittery7 · 10/07/2015 20:15

I have a child with moderate special needs and ASD. Proud FB reports make me sad, bitter and jealous.

Gymtortoise · 10/07/2015 20:15

Surely then all the parents will work out the whole class got more or less the same copy and paste report?

MarkRuffaloCrumble · 10/07/2015 20:18

When I read my DS's report today my first thought was 'wow, I'm so proud of him! I should tell everyone how well he's doing, in fact I could photograph the section of the report that was gushing about how great he is and just post it on FB'.

Then I read DD's which started with the word 'wow!' And continued in a similar way. I thought I'd put hers up too, but then it mentioned her scruffy hand writing and I paused.

How would she feel about everyone knowing her weakness? Being compared to DS's 100% report with her 99% perfect report. So I didn't post pics or even a gushy message and I resolved to tell them both how proud I am again instead.

Every school report post i read after that made me realise that of course it's only the good reports that get a mention on there. Plenty of kids will have an average or below average report and bragging about my bright and well behaved DCs may bring me a few moments of reflected glory, but could also piss off someone else or just bore people who already know my kids are lovely and clever etc.

I'm proud, but the only people who need to be told that are my DCs.

TwilightMad · 10/07/2015 20:18

I have commented today to say how proud I am of my Dd for doing well but that's it. Then one of my Facebook friends took it upon herself to take pictures of every page of her son's report including his levels from his year 6 sats and she posted all of it to Facebook! I think this kind of thing is ridiculous and clearly attention seeking.

ZuleikaJambiere · 10/07/2015 20:19

It amuses me that there appears to be 7 children who are all top of the same class tonight, and 90% who are well above average ... something doesn't add up ...

Passmethecrisps · 10/07/2015 20:21

Are people actually putting pictures of the report up? Or are they paraphrasing?

I have only ever seen the "so proud blah blah" ones. They don't bother me one jot. If you can't be publicly delighted with your children then it is a sad world

Finola1step · 10/07/2015 20:21

What I don't get are the posts addressed to the actual child. Praise your 6 year old to their face, not on FB. Unless of course some 6 year olds manage their own social media communications

Philoslothy · 10/07/2015 20:22

I quite like seeing that children are doing well.

hanami · 10/07/2015 20:26

Well, we'll see, gym. I can't quite imagine the teacher has used copy and paste to describe the whole class as "whimsical" (translation, a bit of an over-imaginative cheeky dreamer... my DD to a "t")

Would be quite funny if he had though!

gaslamp · 10/07/2015 20:29

I don't mind what parents say to some extent - as long as they are not bloody BLESSED - if they are, they are also deleted and blocked.

Having said that, I wouldn't put up DD's report - it's always really good, it comes easily to her although she works hard too and I always tell her how proud I am. But I have friends whose children have SEN and really struggle and I know from speaking to them that the 'my perfect child, my perfect BLESSED life' posts are galling.

BetweenTwoLungs · 10/07/2015 20:29

As a teacher whos reports went out tonight, I can promise you they're not all copy and posted! Mine were done one by one and took bloody ages! But well worth it.

Momzilla82 · 10/07/2015 20:30

Eugh. I hate this almost as much as smug parents evening posts. Obviously my DS is the brightest child in the whole world and I'm just such an amazing parent!!!!
With no regard for those people whose DC may struggle. Block/ hide. It's the only way

T1meout · 10/07/2015 20:30

My dd wd be so cross if I put her report on FB and I know none of my friends would be in the slightest bit interested if I did. Nobody I know has posted the reports - I'm quite disappointed now.

Momzilla82 · 10/07/2015 20:32

Ps we have a name for people like this in our house "dolphins" as in from the film Finding Nemo "there just always Soooo happy" it can also be used as a verb stop being a dolphin!!

CocktailQueen · 10/07/2015 20:32

Teachers aren't allowed to say anything negative in reports! So take them with a pinch of salt...

DS had an accurate, but good, report.

But if any of my friends put 'lil princess' on their facebook statuses, I'd defriend them immediately. Yuk.

T1meout · 10/07/2015 20:32

Oh... Just went on and my friend has posted her dd's, ha!

Why would you think anyone cared, really?

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