to be think the head teacher is wrong (TT holiday)

[Thancred]

We've booked a week long holiday for mid-September. I filled in a leave request form at school citing the reasons for the absence. DH can't get any leave until September, they have a lot of term time workers so the year round staff aren't allowed to take more than one or two days off in school holidays unless it's an emergency/sickness. In addition to this we have a DC with ASD who cannot cope with how busy everywhere is in school holidays, even day trips in school holidays are a nightmare if it's somewhere too busy or loud so he ends up miserable or melting down and we have to come home early - a week of that without the option of escaping back home would be horrid for him. So we made the decision that the only way we will get a family holiday is to go in TT when it is quieter and when DH can get the time off work.

We've had a letter back from the head this afternoon and she has rejected it outright. I rang up to discuss it and she has said she does not consider any of it to be a good enough reason. I explained about the ASD issues and her response was "that's life, if xxx can't cope with in the school holidays then don't go".

I've rang the LEA for advice and they've stated that under their guidance it would be classed as exceptional circumstances but they can't overturn the heads decision so we will probably be passed over to them for a fine to be issued.

AIBU to be annoyed at the head? Does anyone know if fines can be appealed once issued?

I am surprised the LEA have said they would call this situation 'exceptional circumstances'. My school would NOT authorise this and would fine you. Your reasons would apply every school year - would you expect leave to be authorised every school year?

Couldn't you have waited until October half term when it might have been less busy than the summer?

While I can see the issues here mid September is a very disruptive time for a holiday for the pupil and for the school.

And the LA is being very unfair to the HT who really isn't in a position to authorise this. She doesn't issue the fines.

Our school has specifically ask parents not to take holidays in September as it is so much about settling in.

Could you not go the week before half term or something instead? Or of course still go but pay the fine.

This is prime new classes settling in time. The "least productive" time in term is usually just before xmas (as kids are too excited) or just before summer term (but after end of terms trips/plays etc)

The thing is a holiday is lovely but not considered a right. Our school rejects ALL term time holidays regardless of circumstances.

My son has learning difficulties / ASD and attends a special school where the head and governors take a very common sense approach to term time holidays and understand the social benefits of travel and how hard it can be to take children with multiple difficulties away. It sounds like your head needs some ASD awareness training!!!

I think your issue is actually with the work for taking on too many term time only people. I don't think they're being reasonable, assuming you're not exaggerating the situation.

It's a bad time to pick to not be at school. Why not just go somewhere very very quiet during the holidays. An Island without an airport is usually quiet.

YABU. The head at my school wouldn't authorise it either, you'd be told that you could choose a quieter holiday destination as there are plenty of them. The time your DH can get off work is relevant, but it's a problem that a lot of people have and holidays aren't essential. You could have gone at the end of the summer term to minimise the disruption to your ds's education, but instead you've chosen the worst time to go.

DH doesn't have any leave as his work is seasonal over the summer. We are having decent holidays at May and October half term instead. Our DCs have some particular issues that have made holidays difficult in the past, it may be a silver lining as they will actually be better in their own home with day trips or weekend than marooned in a strange environment sharing a soggy muddy tent

not exceptional to me

You can still go tho

So you want special treatment due to your husbands work schedule?

Mid september is just about the worst time for the child to miss.

You aren't being fair to them, they will just be settling in to the new year.

Go another time.

It would probably have been sensible to find out if permission would be forthcoming before booking the holiday. However it is now booked, so advice on choosing a quiet island can't be of much help.

If a fine is issued, you could opt to not pay, let the LEA take you to court, where with any luck the magistrates will take a lenient view, and your Head will have to turn up, hang around and give evidence. See if she enjoys her time being wasted.

I to have a ds with asd, I totally feel your frustration, when my dd was at primary school we got refused just like yourselves though my ds special school could understand the reasons why, which were the same as your reasons, now because my dd school refused we haven't been away four four years, we are not asking to go on holiday every year let alone ever being able to go abroad.

Life is so much more difficult with a child who has additional needs at the best of times, but the one thing that upsets me is the siblings either have to miss out, or only go with one parent so you never do things as family.

Reading some of the flippant comments just makes me sad.

Ultimately it's their decision and you can either accept it (not go or accept the fine) or fight it.
DS is missing the last day of school this term and even though he will only miss watching a dvd and playing games (Teacher confirmed this), has an exceptional attendance and academic record and we have a good reason we didn't get authorisation. I have accepted that if they fine us they fine us and had a good rant about the stupidity of the system to myself and my friends but it is the system it is well advertised and for them moment we'll just have to stick with it.

I think the problem you have is bringing in multiple issues. A lot of parents have seasonal work- where I grew up no tourists=no salary for most families, so that gets people's backs up.

It does seem that there's a consensus that September is the worst time.

You really need to band together and stop this insane situation of fines, and letting schools run your life. Letting the headteacher decide if you are allowed to go on holiday? Its crazy, and I cant believe so many people accept it. And its not as if it works for stated purposes anyway.

Yabu, there are ways you can work around it like going to a quieter place or after September when your dh can get leave. If they allow this then everyone will be coming up with situations which they feel might be exceptional to them. Wouldn't it be harder in any case for your ds to adjust missing out on work?

maybe some of you have no clue how the previous system was abused, by adults, who of course ALL know about eduction because they went to school so they can remotely judge if their kid needs to be at school IN SEPTEMBER ffs

or they are the ones who write to complain when a member of staff is ill, or who ask for extra work to cover your bloody holiday, or who ask teachers to basically PARENT their child ( 'can you tell her she is grounded next week?' Er - NO) or who moan when their books arent marked every week?

MAYBE

And very stupid as well to book a holiday before confirming that the leave is actually approved.

I do think mid September isn't the best time to book a holiday as the children will all be settling in to their new classes etc. However, any other time when they won't miss anything important I would bite the bullet and take my dc on holiday. It would go down as unauthorised and there may be a fine to pay but I'd accept that and get on with it. I'd do what I felt was important for my dc.

If you feel that you have genuine exceptional circumstances due to the health issues of your child and the work circumstances of your DH then I would write back to head cc the chair of governors and your LEA. Set out the reasons why you feel s/he has not considered your request fully.

But, in future September is not a good time - it is a crucial time at school which may be why the decision was made. Parents who have specific work schedules are often given consideration by schools as in the guidance eg police, army etc