to be think the head teacher is wrong (TT holiday)

[Thancred]

We've booked a week long holiday for mid-September. I filled in a leave request form at school citing the reasons for the absence. DH can't get any leave until September, they have a lot of term time workers so the year round staff aren't allowed to take more than one or two days off in school holidays unless it's an emergency/sickness. In addition to this we have a DC with ASD who cannot cope with how busy everywhere is in school holidays, even day trips in school holidays are a nightmare if it's somewhere too busy or loud so he ends up miserable or melting down and we have to come home early - a week of that without the option of escaping back home would be horrid for him. So we made the decision that the only way we will get a family holiday is to go in TT when it is quieter and when DH can get the time off work.

We've had a letter back from the head this afternoon and she has rejected it outright. I rang up to discuss it and she has said she does not consider any of it to be a good enough reason. I explained about the ASD issues and her response was "that's life, if xxx can't cope with in the school holidays then don't go".

I've rang the LEA for advice and they've stated that under their guidance it would be classed as exceptional circumstances but they can't overturn the heads decision so we will probably be passed over to them for a fine to be issued.

AIBU to be annoyed at the head? Does anyone know if fines can be appealed once issued?

The rules set up for schools are quite draconian and there is very wiggle room. Most schools were quite happy to allow the 10 annual days before the government changed the rules. The rules changed from to remove special circumstances, which I think would have included your situation op, to leave only exceptional. A holiday isn't exceptional.

I really don't know what your LEA is on about. The decision (or lack there of) lies with the head teacher. Different LEAs impose the fines to different degrees.

If I were you I would just go. I don't believe in this policy or the fines. I do agree that sen children should be given latitude as well as all those parents who simply cannot get time off in holiday times. However that latitude doesn't exist in the current set up.

Blame the government not the individual schools.

OP if there is a fine, please do pay it promptly. But I would still register a complaint once it is paid. how dare a head teacher tell you, the mother of a child with ASD that they can't take a holiday and use the phrase 'that's life'! That's your life, not her's/his.

NickiFury enjoy your holiday.

I think Baddz has hit the nail on the head! But now she wants an ofsted outstanding rating before she retires so has cracked down. I am sensing it is not about children's education but about pandering to Ofsted.

FrankietheSquealer it's true not everyone is thinking of their kids all the time but equally we trust parents to make choices for kids. The government doesn't send snoops to look in your shopping trolley to see what fruit and veg you buy! I would totally agree it is not right for children to miss large chunks of school. But a holiday is not a large chunk. A week is about 5% of the school year, isn't it?

Reading so many crap comments I just wish we could afford to go abroad and I'd book a big stinking holiday in teh middle of the school year. I know my kids would get a lot out of it and I can't pretty much guarantee some of what they would be missing might be 'tidying up' 'making costumes or props for school play', 'helping to clean out the cupboard' 'listening as whole class told off because one person was naughty' etc etc.

Sadly it is UK camp site for us in August!

A fine suggests you have broken a law, the fact the law says you can't is what is crazy, IMHO.

Hey greyhound so we can all go on holiday then? In term time?

The beginning of the school year is awful for him, everyone else settling in and their various behaviours throws him off, he doesn't usually settle until nearer the end of the month once everyone else has calmed down. Mid-September is ideal for him as it gets him away from it and he'll return a week later when his classmates are calmer.

I wouldn't expect "special treatment" every year. We're working a lot on coping mechanisms and the idea that sometimes you need to do things that might make you uncomfortable, but it's a work in progress. DH has spoken to his employer and they've said that next summer they can likely arrange for him to have a week at the end of the holidays, given the situation. Those two factors in combination will hopefully mean that this year would be a one off.

FWIW, and not intended as a boast, he is on the top table and really far ahead in literacy, phonics, and numeracy so the academic side isn't too much if an issue. I have also offered to take his worksheets with us, he enjoys them so it's not as if it would be a chore for him.

Take your term time holiday, but don't make extra work for the teacher by asking them to provide worksheets for you.

Pay the fine with the money you will have saved by going in term time.

PS I don't blame the schools, I blame the government and I Ofsted are crap IMHO! I think anyone who does not like the system should protest.

Brilliant article - Recent www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/familyholidays/11680550/Time-to-scrap-term-time-holiday-fines-why-the-Government-should-subsidise-family-travel.html

Old story www.bbc.co.uk/news/education-29744465

If anyone finds an on line petition about this, please do say where it is... or start one!

Sept is essential in school. Sorry. The ASD sounds like an excuse. There are thousands of places to go that are quieter and more chilled. Not everywhere is a heaving mess in the holidays.

I totally understand, we're lucky this year, our school don't go back until the 9th of Sept

We've booked the 29 aug-5th sept as holiday for a week, when most families will already be home and thinking about going back to school, as i know a few around the country will be going back as early as the 2/3 September!

AnyoneForTennis it's really not for me to say when you can have a holiday, is it! And that is point. A week or two on holiday is not going to do any harm to my child's education. And if you think it is for your child, then you won't take your holiday then. Which is our right.

And once more and more parents are able to take their kids out during term time a few other pluses might happen....

• The holiday companies will not be able to charge massive amounts for school vaccination time holidays (a win for those who want their kids not to miss time off school - so if you feel this way you should be campaigning for greater freedom for others as that will mean greater freedom/at least better prices for your family!

• Also, maybe that annoying kid who keeps bulling everyone or making life a misery for the supply teacher, reducing them to tears, or causing mayhem in the play ground, maybe their family will go on holiday for a week or two in term time and everyone will breath a sigh of relief!

• And maybe instead of finding ways to force our kids to stay in the class Ofsted will be forced to make a priority of the things parents want (or at least some parents want, some of the time) and everyone will be a little happier.

The worksheets are three home week sheets they get each week. It's one side of A4 with some sums or sentences on. It wouldn't be extra work because if we were here he'd get them anyway.

The ASD sounds like an excuse.

Yeah. When he was diagnosed I wasn't at all worried about his future or upset about ways in which he may struggle to deal with the world. No, no. My first thought was "brilliant, now I can get that term time holoday I've been hankering after"

I'm not sure where you are planning on going on holiday but you should check how busy it will be. You might find the very last week before school officially starts is quieter than the week after.

So next year he'll be fine in peak season as your DH will get holiday then....but this year he can't possibly manage it?

Our schools are going back on 2 Sept, but on the other hand, tomorrow is the last day of term for us. So with schools still open in many other areas, we're off on holiday on Saturday to take advantage of the lower prices we get for that one week.

Oour LA had a consultation last year to see if people wanted holidays to fall in line with most of England. They got a resounding NO, cos most people take advantage of that earlier start to the holidays.

They left the term dates as they were.

So next year he'll be fine in peak season as your DH will get holiday then....but this year he can't possibly manage it?

Next year it will be a possibility, as I said in my PP we are working a lot on coping mechanisms and dealing with situations that make him uncomfortable. DH will also have the option of leave. Those two factors in combination will mean that next year it hopefully won't be an issue, but that all depends on how well things go.

You are bemoaning that other children aren't calm Enough!?

Can you even gauge busy-ness? Loads of people with no kids/ grown up kids wait until the schools go and then leave.

It's a hotel aimed at families with children, lots of kids facilities, entertainment, pool slides, that sort of thing. We asked the travel agent what it was like in September and read some reviews, all agreed it was reasonably quiet at that time.

Just be honest. You want a holiday, a cheap holiday at a time convenient for you.

The Head has seen through it. Suck it up and pay the fine.

Holidays are essential to me. We all have different priorities and as the single parent of TWO children with ASD then I would judge holidays to be utterly necessary to MY well being.

You are bemoaning thatotherchildren aren't calm Enough!?

I'm not bemoaning it. I work with young children, I know how difficult some children find it to settle. I was talking about my own child finding it difficult to be around children who may be in an exciteable or agitated state as it has an effect on him. I wouldn't expect other children to modify their behaviour around him and I'm not sure why you think I'm 'bemoaning' it.