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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not get the "I have loads of kids so I can claim benefits and have an easy life"idea

225 replies

Lancashiregal10 · 14/06/2014 21:19

Taking to my neighbour today who has five kids. Her and her husband claim benefits.
We live in a part council estate/ part privately owned
Today and many times in the past she has took great delight in telling me that they had five kids to claim all the benefits. She admits they would only have had one if they had to work.
Before I had DS 10 months early I just used to shrug and think "each to their own". I know this sort of talk would annoy a lot of people but I was of the opinion that I would not swap places with her for the world and my husband and I get a lot out of our careers.
So anyway talking to her today I realised something.
Taking care of a baby is hard work (never mind five under eight)
This lady is always running round after her kids and always looks completely knackard as does her hubby. They never seem to have any time to relax, the nights trying to get their kids to sleep are awful as they all have to share bedrooms and when one kids wakes it sets the others off.
I want to shake her and say "you do realise working is actually easier then having all these kids" (four if which you did not really want) though I course I have no doubt in my mind she loves them to bits.
I just don't get the thinking of some people!
Can I also say this is not a benefit bashing thread and I am highly in favour of the Welfare state for those who need it. I guess I just don't understand how some people think a house full of kids is easier then going to work. And that you would have kids for that reason.
Also is the amount you get really so fabulous that you would do this?

OP posts:
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Annunziata · 14/06/2014 21:22

I don't think it is true.

I have 7. We don't get child benefit any more, but it's definitely only a drop in the ocean of what you need for so many children.

I do think that there are some young women (and men) who have come from backgrounds where the past 2 generations have not worked and they just don't know how to.

AnyoneForTennis · 14/06/2014 21:25

Er unless they have disabilities/sickness etc, I think you will find one of them will be claiming JSA and therefore be required to be actively seeking work!

TucsonGirl · 14/06/2014 21:29

It shouldn't be an option. How many of her 5 kids will grow up to have any kind of work ethic? Far more likely that they'll grow up seeing life on benefits as the norm and go on to do the same thing themselves.

LuisSuarezTeeth · 14/06/2014 21:34

Really?

Lancashiregal10 · 14/06/2014 21:37

I don't honestly know if one of both is getting JSA. I am guessing so
I did not think you actually did in essence just get paid to have kids (though many daily mail readers seem to think you do get paid to do this!!!)
Maybe it's because (I dare I admit this on a mums forum)
that I don't think I am a natural mum. I love my DS more then life itself but I really have to work to be good at the mums stuff. Whereas work seems to come totally natural to me.

OP posts:
usualsuspectt · 14/06/2014 21:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LynetteScavo · 14/06/2014 21:41

Well, it's a bit late now to shake her as she would have to have a decently paid job to earn as much as shes probably getting in benefits.

I think some people enjoy running around after five kids, and never having any time to themselves. I know people who don't claim any benefits who dash around taking their many DC to various activities, while never spending any time or money on themselves.

I usually enjoy running around after my three DC. But then I work as well, so am permanently tired. Grin

Lancashiregal10 · 14/06/2014 21:45

I know lots of parents who have loads of kids and love every second of it
It was just neighbour saying "we would have only had one but we wanted to claim money"
I just can't imagine that way of thinking and being so afraid of work. I think they have been watching Tony Robinsons "worst jobs in history" and think all jobs are like that.

OP posts:
Fideliney · 14/06/2014 21:47

You had your son 10 months early?! Confused

Fideliney · 14/06/2014 21:50

Today and many times in the past she has took great delight in telling me that they had five kids to claim all the benefits. She admits they would only have had one if they had to work.

Just don't believe it. Sorry.

Either you're making it up or she's saying it to get a rise out of your frothy DM reading self. Why in god's name would anyone say that other than to wind someone up?

LuisSuarezTeeth · 14/06/2014 21:51

Lancashire this is a terribly popular topic - have you seen any of the other threads addressing this?

Nerf · 14/06/2014 21:53

I want 7 kids annunziata. Every time you post that I have a little stab of envy Grin. Won't get any child benefit so it's just not worth my while though Wink

Blindlyshining · 14/06/2014 21:54

Grin Wink

ICanHearYou · 14/06/2014 21:55

Having children is lucrative in the uk. Not forever though and they will not enjoy retirement

Beastofburden · 14/06/2014 21:55

To be fair, you are probably good at your job and confident in it. But for some ppl, they can't imagine themselves in a job where they were good at it and secure. So for them, having a houseful of kids is easier, not because its less work but because you can't be sacked, and you don't have to do the office politics- you are the mum, so in your little world, you are the most important person. It can make you both overconfident and terrified of the outside world at the same time.

LuisSuarezTeeth · 14/06/2014 21:56

When I had my 17th, His Tonyness asked if I'd like a £5 voucher for M&S.

LuisSuarezTeeth · 14/06/2014 21:57

having children is lucrative

On planet Earth?

Annunziata · 14/06/2014 21:57

:)

EatShitDerek · 14/06/2014 21:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SantasLittleMonkeyButler · 14/06/2014 21:59

I also want to know how you had your DS 10 months early!?

LuisSuarezTeeth · 14/06/2014 21:59

Derek that was a fuck of a lot! How entitled are you? Wink

Fideliney · 14/06/2014 22:00

having children is lucrative

I'm desperately worried about your financial circs now IcanHearYou. Lucrative? Compared to WHAT?

OP PLEASE come back and explain how you gave birth to your DS 10 months early.

Blindlyshining · 14/06/2014 22:01

I'm torn.

See at least benefits claiming bastards are at home with their kids instead of sending them to evil cesspits of childcare while their mums work. On the other hand, are they spending their benefits on cigarettes and alcohol? I just wish I had some controversial opinions to set this thread alight.

LuisSuarezTeeth · 14/06/2014 22:01

Fid chill. You know why.

Fideliney · 14/06/2014 22:03

No. Why? Did she buy him?

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