To not get the "I have loads of kids so I can claim benefits and have an easy life"idea

[Lancashiregal10]

Taking to my neighbour today who has five kids. Her and her husband claim benefits.
We live in a part council estate/ part privately owned
Today and many times in the past she has took great delight in telling me that they had five kids to claim all the benefits. She admits they would only have had one if they had to work.
Before I had DS 10 months early I just used to shrug and think "each to their own". I know this sort of talk would annoy a lot of people but I was of the opinion that I would not swap places with her for the world and my husband and I get a lot out of our careers.
So anyway talking to her today I realised something.
Taking care of a baby is hard work (never mind five under eight)
This lady is always running round after her kids and always looks completely knackard as does her hubby. They never seem to have any time to relax, the nights trying to get their kids to sleep are awful as they all have to share bedrooms and when one kids wakes it sets the others off.
I want to shake her and say "you do realise working is actually easier then having all these kids" (four if which you did not really want) though I course I have no doubt in my mind she loves them to bits.
I just don't get the thinking of some people!
Can I also say this is not a benefit bashing thread and I am highly in favour of the Welfare state for those who need it. I guess I just don't understand how some people think a house full of kids is easier then going to work. And that you would have kids for that reason.
Also is the amount you get really so fabulous that you would do this?

More lucrative than jsa, or a 30k a year job if you have more than 3 of them.

I agree op. Children are harder work than most jobs I've had. And expensive. I would hate to have children and no money, it certainly wouldn't be an easy life.

When DM readers people go on about families on Benefits with thousands of children (!) and how much easier their lives are and how they get this and that for free I always think: What are those people going to do when the children leave home and the benefits diminish. And their earning potential is rubbish. And they don't own their home and have to downsize. Is that a life you would want for yourself?

Fid because you're more valuable elsewhere.

More lucrative than jsa, or a 30k a year job if you have more than 3 of them.

Oh you'll be making the classic mistake of factoring in a monetary value for the free goats and badgers BUT failing to consider the goat and badger running costs. Or lifetime earnings lost. Or pension contributions not accrued. Or the expense (frequently) of being a tenant in old age).

Easy mistake to make.

I think it just boils down to couples not having much forethought.

Even as a sahm with a working dh, with 5 young children I'd be burning the wick at both ends. I've ebf both dc & gone on to bf full term which was, whilst rewarding, etc, very demanding, both physically & demanding. Our dc are both doted on. I couldn't imagine myself being able to put as much effort in with another 3 dc & that wouldn't be fair on dc1&2 or the next 3.

Fid because you're more valuable elsewhere.

Am I being recruited?

Btw, I have to agree with you, op, it's crazy.

Presumably OP meant 10 months earlier, ie 10 months ago?

Bit hard to tell what she meant as she seems to have gone.

I once saw vanessa feltz (I think) sYing woukdnt we all have many many children if money and practicalities were no object? As if it were a given. I just thought no. Im not a atural mum

Trying to bring up 5 kids on naff all. Not a life i'd choose. People are nuts.

If I won the lottery and also had queues ofnloving brilliant nannies wanting to work with my family I can confidently say I'd still not choose to have more. The two I have were very much planned and wanted, I had a relatively easy time of it but bloody hell theyre hard work.

I always think of Vanessa as the anti-Buddha stealth (IYSWIM)

Can someone have a dig down the back of the sofa for the OP? I'll check she didn't get chucked in the recycling by mistake.

Same here. I love my two but when people ask if we are going to have a third I inwardly shudder.

I'm just worried that there are people who seem to think she has a point.

No notat all fide sorry :o

I honestly can't picture that conversation at all

It reminds me of Ireland about six months after the Romanian gyspies arrived, someone on the radio saying that had been chatting to his Romanian neighbour who had told him that they'd come to Ireland because of the benefits. The bastard radio host never even challenged this, even though it was too early for the Romanians to have learnt much English at that stage, and secondly, why would a gypsy be having such a friendly conversation with a racist bigot?

why would a gypsy be having such a friendly conversation with a racist bigot?

Innante helpfulness?

innate^

I specifically mentioned lack of pension actually.

It doesn't take a genius to work out that when you've got 3 kids you get more in benefits than some people earn, it's a huge issue with the wages in this country.

Saying that doesn't make me a benefits basher it is basic maths!

Benefits for an unemployed person with three children might be a higher income than FT NMW for a single person ICan, but since when was national minimum wage the definition of 'lucrative'?!

In any case, welfare is very short term now - I believe people are expected to find work when their youngest turns one or claim JSA and show substantial evidence of jobsearching. It doesn't sound pleasant or an easy ride. I wouldn't fancy it. Would you?

There are a lot of threads on MN where posters claim that their neighbours or friends have spilled their guts on a benefits lifestyle.