To not get the "I have loads of kids so I can claim benefits and have an easy life"idea

[Lancashiregal10]

Taking to my neighbour today who has five kids. Her and her husband claim benefits.
We live in a part council estate/ part privately owned
Today and many times in the past she has took great delight in telling me that they had five kids to claim all the benefits. She admits they would only have had one if they had to work.
Before I had DS 10 months early I just used to shrug and think "each to their own". I know this sort of talk would annoy a lot of people but I was of the opinion that I would not swap places with her for the world and my husband and I get a lot out of our careers.
So anyway talking to her today I realised something.
Taking care of a baby is hard work (never mind five under eight)
This lady is always running round after her kids and always looks completely knackard as does her hubby. They never seem to have any time to relax, the nights trying to get their kids to sleep are awful as they all have to share bedrooms and when one kids wakes it sets the others off.
I want to shake her and say "you do realise working is actually easier then having all these kids" (four if which you did not really want) though I course I have no doubt in my mind she loves them to bits.
I just don't get the thinking of some people!
Can I also say this is not a benefit bashing thread and I am highly in favour of the Welfare state for those who need it. I guess I just don't understand how some people think a house full of kids is easier then going to work. And that you would have kids for that reason.
Also is the amount you get really so fabulous that you would do this?

You just have to go onto entitled too and look up the benefits amount for three children and understand that most people in the country get paid far less than 25k a year

Or you just have to have the basic economic grounding to understand that if tax credits cut off at a lower wage than they will pay out in various circumstances, that sometimes it does not pay to work.

It's just basic maths, there is no need for bashing, just an economic problem that needs to be solved, some think by austerity and some think by improving job prospects and education. I am in the latter group so why my thoughts have been ripped apart by people bleating on about goats is beyond me. Get a grip for goodness sake.

I don't think anyone's having a pop at you ican - I think your posts are very genuine.

Of course they are, read the thread, there is no space for actual and honest conversation just people behaving like children. It's a shame as this site has lots of intelligent people on it, the economic situation involving our poorest and most vulnerable people should be discussing without derailing, emotive clap-trap.

No, I think there a little bit of at the OPs supposed conversation with a neighbour with 5 kids who would've only had 1 if they didn't get shitloads of benefits but this is not supposed to be a benefits bashing thread. Naive at the very least but I don't think so somehow

I think if the OP had been "AIBU to think benefits enable/trap people into having large families" it would have been a more sensible debate.

People wonder why others get pissed off

"AIBU to think benefits enable/trap people into having large families"

Thus taking all responsibility away from the person bragging about that sort of lifestyle.

Blindlyshining you are so right
I am sorry OP of course you telling the www About your neighbour and her benefits was in no way a BB thread... sorry
but I got sowhen caps were mentioned, that i allowed my envy to colour my posts
my DS has always wanted a cap, we have never been able to afford one.....so poor little chap has gone without
I have now set up a Just give page
www.justgiveacaptomyds.org.uk
please donate if you can he promises the goat won't eat it

The person supposedly bragging...

The better solution is to integrate people into society in a way that allows them to feel connected and a part of something, in this respects our education system is truly lacking.

To say 'nothing' can be done is so defeatist, lots can be done.

No blindly, the people definitely bragging. Just one example posted above. I see it a lot, I get shit off my friends who are on benefits saying they don't know why I work when I could just have babies and be better off, making me feel bad when I cry off a night out because I can't afford it. It doesn't bother me not being able to afford it, but for some reason it gets them spitting because I don't want their lifestyle despite them having more.

Sorry defiant I might not have been clear enough. I don't doubt you when you say you have witnessed people bragging. I doubt the OP's intentions in starting this thread.

If she really wanted to live the life of Riley, she should have disabled kids. She'd be raking it in, get free cars, and everything.

It all depends on what your earning capability is.

I remember relatives in the mining areas lose their jobs and their sons and daughters not finding work in the 80s. There really was nothing, and most of them didn't see why they should leave their home town to find one.

If the best that the community has to offer is working in a meat factory most would choose to leave and look for better, but many would stay and sign on.

Many women don't find real work after children so bringing up children can become what they do for a living. I'm thinking that these days are numbered though as the government will probably start enforced child are at some point to get people off this so called leisure lifestyle.

Of course we should be thinking long term. We should also be discussing and be allowed to discuss how those changes can be made.

There is space for lots of opinions but not when any semblance of realistic conversation is met by idiocy

Just because she told you this is her reason for having kids, doesn't mean it's true.

ICan I, for one, refuse to have a sensible conversation about policy on the back of such a dubious "my neighbour said something conveniently self-debasing and massively unlikely - now let's all bash the poor" OP.

It's also highly suspicious that the OP hasn't been back.

I am entitled to four free cars, I shall drive them all at the same time.

Three children in each dawn? Makes sense. You might have more trouble dividing the two husbands into four parts though

I think if such posts sparked interesting discussions based around mutual respect, that such posters who only joined for dubious means would probably grow bored and piss off.

All you are doing is preventing discussion and feeding them.

Benefits are shit tbh. I should know ... I claim them and I can't wait til I get off them. What gets my goat is people who are
Icky and rich enough not to claim them judging others and anLysing how to spend. The rich are tax dodgers too you know!