To be sick of DP's poo crumbs?

[nomorecrumbs]

My DP is very hairy. He leaves poo crumbs and hair on the seat every day and I'm sick of wiping it. This is way worse than the seat-up-or-down debate. I finally snapped after a year and told him he must start using wet wipes to avoid the poo crumb issue. I feel like I'm looking after a 2 year old in this regard.

It's been particularly bad in bed this summer as he sleeps naked so the crumbs go EVERYWHERE.

He says I have no right to interfere in his toilet routine and I say I'm not sexing someone who can't keep their poo crumbs under control.

His family are full of boys and he says the poo crumbs thing is normal and that I'm overreacting. AIBU?

I would definitely invest all savings in the state of the art Japanese toilet which squirts your bum with water until sparkling clean and then flushes for you.

Poo crumbs?? God I feel sick.

Are you married to the Gingerbread Man?

I may name change to Sparklingbottom after all this.....

It was a right rum do [folk]. Shall we all synchronize watches for 10.30 and then have a good wipe around bathrooms? Those who 'confidently' know that none of their menfolk have such a problem need to especially examine their sheets of Bounty - perhaps a quick dash to the local forensicsmart to purchases petri dishes, agar jelly and crumb identification manual?

Sorry folk

My toilet and bathroom are already clean but i'm off to give them a quick wipe over with bleach just incase.

My dp makes King Kong look bald .....never encountered a poo crumb in 6 years

as has already been said I couldn't use the same bathroom or bed with someone like that and if you don't maybe he will take the problem seriously. BUT please DO NOT flush down loo, the wet wipes that is. Having said that buy him a small bin with heavy lid plus bin bags and wrap it nicely and give it to him and state that's your final say on the matter either use it or remove hair and clean properly! I think cleaning properly is the problem.

acrid bottom gravy

?
!

No.

Why am i still reading?

If you do wet farts then when you need a fart you get up and go to the loo. It all sounds horrible

I'm surprised no one has mentioned Sootikins yet.

sootikins.blogspot.co.uk/2012_05_01_archive.html

fluffy that is total boakykins. Anything else you care to share? Can see it's going to be a busy day on MN

Eeh fluffy had a good read - am quite giddy with mirth.

Well. This thread's put me right off my Shredded Wheat.

No no no no no no no no no no no

This can not be real. Please? My DP's bum is so hairy it's furry, but I have never had to put up with this sort of thing. Just no! Such blatant disrespect for you and your bed. Who wants to sleep in shit?

I'm sorry, but in all seriousness, I would LTB. I cannot be sleeping in shit bits. I just can't!

Please never sex him again.

you waited a whole year to complain about this

you have been sharing a bed with poo crumbs for a while year

yuk when you grab his arse in the heat of passion does your hand look like maltase's on a summers day yuk

Please, please, PLEASE tell me sootikins aren't real.

I have never wanted to clean my undercarriage as much as I do after reading this thread. With bleach and a Brillo pad.

My OH is as furry as a bear. NEVER has a poo crumb crossed my path in the last decade or 2. Make the filthy bastard use the wipes or wash FFS.

And put up some of the basic hand wash technique posters so he stops being a germ spreading, poo and wee water splashing git.

Also, please do not use feet on his bum hole, read these reviews as a warning (or if you need a good laugh)

That's veet, not feet. Bloody autocorrect. Though a switch foot up the arse may be an option

Swift. I give up

Ralph, you've been put off your shredded wheat. I totally understand. I've just woken up to this thread and my bowl of -poo crumbs- coco pops is looking less appetizing by the minute...

My mum used to call them winnets when attached to the dog's bum hair. (Gross)

My dad would say "yeah they're winnets alright, winnet come off" ha ha!

Googled sootikin. Related searches: "mumsnet" , "dragon butter"

Freckley, just don't look at the bits left in the bottom of the cereal bag.

This thread is utterly utterly vile. I have IBS, have had piles, have had post natally damaged arsehole and I clean myself. How can anyone feel comfortable knowing they haven't made sure they are thoroughly clean after going to the loo?? I am absolutely stunned. We have wet wipes in every toilet in this house and everyone uses them.

As for people sitting down and leaving skid marks, they need to go to the fucking toilet! As I've said I have IBS. I have regularly sat on the loo for 40 mins as I've bloated, have gas but can't be confident about what is coming out iykwim? I wouldn't dream of walking around doing "wet farts" as that's vile and disgusting.

Some of you need to kick your partners into shape and fast. Utterly vile.