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AIBU?

To be sick of DP's poo crumbs?

536 replies

nomorecrumbs · 31/07/2013 20:14

My DP is very hairy. He leaves poo crumbs and hair on the seat every day and I'm sick of wiping it. This is way worse than the seat-up-or-down debate. I finally snapped after a year and told him he must start using wet wipes to avoid the poo crumb issue. I feel like I'm looking after a 2 year old in this regard.

It's been particularly bad in bed this summer as he sleeps naked so the crumbs go EVERYWHERE.

He says I have no right to interfere in his toilet routine and I say I'm not sexing someone who can't keep their poo crumbs under control.

His family are full of boys and he says the poo crumbs thing is normal and that I'm overreacting. AIBU?

OP posts:

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elvisola · 31/07/2013 20:30

Wait till he's asleep in his soup of poo crumbs, stick a couple of Immac wax strips between his butt cheeks and leave for as long as possible for maximum sticking effect. Then rip.

If he complains tell him it was to save your relationship. Eugghh!

deepfriedsage · 31/07/2013 20:31

How can you sleep on a giant nappy each night? Boak. I would ltb and put down the sheets, bath and toilet seat behavior as examples of his unreasonable behavior, nobody would expect anyone to live under those conditions.

SuckAtRelationships · 31/07/2013 20:33

er, I have a hairy arse (WHAT?! I can't be arsed (pun) waxing/shaving right now!) AND I have piles. I have no poo crumbs. If it's not easy to wipe with tissues alone then I use sensitive baby wipes.

He is making excuses for being revolting.

I honestly would leave over that. It's beyond foul.

orangeandemons · 31/07/2013 20:34

I thought the correct name for these was winnets?

HollyBerryBush · 31/07/2013 20:36

cant he shit and shower?

maddening · 31/07/2013 20:36

Don't do the waxing

KirjavaTheCat · 31/07/2013 20:37

The fuck?!

POO CRUMBS?

That is beyond revolting.

maddening · 31/07/2013 20:37

Veet maybe?

maddening · 31/07/2013 20:38

Oh and tell him to have a bath every night before bed

Nirvana79 · 31/07/2013 20:38

I'd leave him, seriously. Tell him you'll come back once he's toilet trained. Dirty bastard.

Faithless12 · 31/07/2013 20:39

YANBU, that is gross! I feel sick, make him sleep in a separate bed, wearing something.

Gargula · 31/07/2013 20:40

Oh. My. Fucking. God.

fluffyraggies · 31/07/2013 20:40

Winnets?!
Winnets.

fluffyraggies · 31/07/2013 20:41

It's 'Clag-nuts', surely?

RhondaJean · 31/07/2013 20:41

Ewwwwww.

I've just tried to imagine my DHs face if he did this once, and failed. He would be mortified. What fully functioning adult can't manage to wipe their own arse properly???

NomNomDePlum · 31/07/2013 20:42

no-one who thinks it's okay to leave chunks of shit all over the place deserves to be sharing a living space. how can you even look at him? dear god.

ViviPru · 31/07/2013 20:42

HILARIOUS.

SnoopySnoopyDoggDogg · 31/07/2013 20:43

dongleberries ??!!?!

Poo troll or not this is hilarious

MamaLazarou · 31/07/2013 20:44

I have been married to a hairy-bummed man for ten years and had never heard of poo crumbs until just now. LTB! Wiping your arse properly really is one of the basic requisites of happy marriage.

Messandmayhem · 31/07/2013 20:46

I...... What...... Why doesn't....

Fuck. I have nothing.

LTB.

Flossiechops · 31/07/2013 20:46

Love it!! Poo crumbs - I've heard it all now

littlemisswise · 31/07/2013 20:46

Buy him one of these OP!

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starfishmummy · 31/07/2013 20:47

I can't help but wonder if the poo crumbs are cube shaped........

Fairylea · 31/07/2013 20:47

Isn't it chug nuts?? Blueerhhgghhh.

nomorecrumbs · 31/07/2013 20:47

Omg, I didn't know it was this bad. I can't be the only woman going through this, surely? He's quite tidy in all other areas...well, he goes about a week between beard-trims, but he does shower every day more or less

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