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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

wibu to dress dd in a bridesmaid dress for my friends wedding when she is not,in fact, a bridesmaid?

210 replies

leftmymistletoeatthedoor · 26/02/2012 18:58

Dd is 17m.

One of my oldest friends is getting married next month. She's only having her sister as a bridesmaid, I think due to costs etc but not sure.

She isn't have any little bridesmaids if that makes a difference.

My mum wants to buy her a dress like this but I'm not sure if it'll seem a bit odd. Ill not be wearing a dress btw and her dad and brother who is 5 will be in kilts.

What do you reckon? Dd doesn't have much hair bless her so I'd like her to wear something girly so people don't think she's a boy

OP posts:
Trills · 26/02/2012 18:59

That is very bridesmaidy - can you not just get her a "party dress" rather than a "bridesmaid dress"?

gordyslovesheep · 26/02/2012 18:59

yes YABVU - if she wanted her to be a BM she would have asked

altinkum · 26/02/2012 19:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

applepieinthesky · 26/02/2012 19:00

YABU. she's not a bridesmaid

chimchar · 26/02/2012 19:00

I think it would be well out of order to be honest.

Buy her a pretty dress that's not cream or white or satin.

YuleingFanjo · 26/02/2012 19:01

If I was a guest I would think she was a bridesmaid.

it's up to you but out of interest is there a slight chance you secretly wished that your oldest friend had asked your daughter to be a bridesmaid?

DawnOfTheDee · 26/02/2012 19:01

That is a bridesmaid's dress I'm afraid. Agree with Trills....find a fancy party dress instead.

Casmama · 26/02/2012 19:01

Agree with others - you don't want your friend to think you are mental. By all means get a pretty dress but not one actually described as a bridesmaids dress!

SoupDragon · 26/02/2012 19:01

No, you shouldn't dress your DD as a bridesmaid when she isn't. There are plenty of other non-bridesmaidy dresses about.

scarletforya · 26/02/2012 19:02

YABU.

I don't understand why you'd want to. Just dress her in a party dress and let the bridesmaids have their day.

workshy · 26/02/2012 19:02

that is definitely a bridesmaids dress

debenhams have some lovely party dresses in at the moment that are beautiful but not bridesmaidsy I just made that word up but you know what I mean

Sarsaparilllla · 26/02/2012 19:03

It is a bit bridesmaid-ish, there's plenty of party type dresses about, I'd go for something else personally

MrsWembley · 26/02/2012 19:03

YABVU, and so is your mum!

Sapphirefling · 26/02/2012 19:03

That's a bridesmaids dress-clue is in the name Wink
YABU.

AlbertoFrog · 26/02/2012 19:04

There are lovely wee dresses everywhere. Why not have fun looking for something nice (and not flower girly). Maybe something your DD will get to wear more than once?

5inthebed · 26/02/2012 19:05

YABU with that dress I'm afraid. Looks and probably is a bridesmaid dress.

What about this, this, this or even this instead.

There are loads of pretty girl dresses you can chose from, why chose a bridesmaid dress?

YuleingFanjo · 26/02/2012 19:05

wat about this instead?

GetOrfMoiiLand · 26/02/2012 19:05

Yes you would be unreasonable and NUTS to do that.

Why not just get her a dress? Do you really think it is that important that your dd gets a load of attention on your friend's wedding day?

LovesBeingWearingSkinnyJeans · 26/02/2012 19:06

Tell your friend that your mum wants to buy dd tgat dress for tge wedding and would she mind.

DaisySteiner · 26/02/2012 19:06

I went to a wedding recently where somebody dressed their little dd as a bridesmaid dress like that one (and their ds in a 'page-boy' outfit) - looked v. odd tbh.

Original poster
leftmymistletoeatthedoor · 26/02/2012 19:06

No no I'm not mental my mum is!!

I said I thought it was odd and am glad you all agree - I particularly wasn't happy about the fact its white/ivory.

I've said all this to my mum but I didn't know if I was being odd. I didn't mean it to be a reverse aibu, I thought I'd made my point clear.

Oh and GOD no I didn't want her to be bridesmaid, it would be my idea of hell shed climb on the pews, throw the flowers around and quite probably vom on the brides dress

OP posts:
Ineedacleaneriamalazyslattern · 26/02/2012 19:08

I don't think it's that bridesmaidy especially as your dd is still only a small toddler. I think the picture is deceptive actually because it looks different on that older child than it would on a 17 month old.
I was bridesmaid at a wedding last year and the only small toddler girl at the wedding wore a dress like that as a guest and nobody was aghast she just looked like a little girl in a party dress.

Spuddybean · 26/02/2012 19:08

yeah, sorry OP, but that is clearly a bridesmaid dress and i would be pissed off if someone who i didn't ask to be a bridesmaid came dressed as one.

(i was royally fucked off when a cousin turned up in a full length weddingy white dress to my wedding)

YuleingFanjo · 26/02/2012 19:09

he he, ok your mum is being a loon Grin
get her oone of the nice dresses linked to - I like the blue one 5inthebed linked to.

Hulababy · 26/02/2012 19:09

Why not go for something a bit more party style - more like these: www.debenhams.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/prod_10001_10001_240010554296_-1?breadcrumb=Home~Kids~Girls+dresses or www.debenhams.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/prod_10001_10001_240010685194_-1?breadcrumb=Home~Kids~Girls+dresses

Or how about a pretty dress including the tartan from her dad and brother's kilt material?