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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Violent little cow at school. How do I deal with this without making it worse for DS

168 replies

Annoyed79 · 16/02/2012 17:46

So this horrible little bitch (sorry, but yeah - she is) has been routinely hitting my son since he started secondary school. Not to mention continuously humiliating him, turning people against him, breaking his belongings etc. Yesterday an argument erupted at school which she took to facebook calling him a "dyspraxic riddled cunt", buck toothed bastard, ugly retard etc etc telling him he'll never have friends, never get a job, never get a girlfriend - the list went on. All this very public on his facebook wall. Along with this she issued a number of violent threats. Now - today she came up behind him and punched him hard in the head. I am absolutely fucking livid. What's worse is the school is shut, teacher training day tomorrow and then a weeks half term holiday.

I cannot just let this go. How do I deal with it without making it worse for DS? She has the majority of the school on her side and I know that if I get the police involved it will flare up for him even more.

What do I do??

OP posts:
TheUnsinkableTitanic · 16/02/2012 17:47

print out pages from facebook
goto police

so sorry for your son

NatashaBee · 16/02/2012 17:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Groovee · 16/02/2012 17:48

Take a screen shot of his facebook with the threats and go to the police.

knackeredmother · 16/02/2012 17:49

That's just awful. I second the police suggestion, don't wait for school.

remote · 16/02/2012 17:49

That is awful. Have the school done anything before this latest incident?

DoingTheBestICan · 16/02/2012 17:50

Print off the pages & inform the police.
Ring the HT tomorrow & inform him you have contacted the police & would like his views on it all.
Send copies to the governors also.
How old is this girl?

TheCrunchUnderfoot · 16/02/2012 17:50

No, going to the police WON'T make it worse. It will make it better. She will crap herself. Police, now.

Original poster
Annoyed79 · 16/02/2012 17:51

No they just say "oh yes, she does have a few problems"

Problems? she's a fucking huge human shaped problem.

OP posts:
OpinionatedMum · 16/02/2012 17:51

How old is she?

I would move him. I know it seems like giving in, but sometimes it is the best option for a fresh start.

How horrid Sad. I was bullied so badly I moved schools myself.

LadySybilDeChocolate · 16/02/2012 17:52

I agree with going to the Police. She's old enough to know better and the continued assaults are just not on. I hope your son's OK.

Original poster
Annoyed79 · 16/02/2012 17:52

she's 13.

OP posts:
DoingTheBestICan · 16/02/2012 17:52

Put it this way op if someone came up to you & punched you in the head would you ring the police?

If the answer is yes,as it should be,then ring the police about this girl.

You must protect your ds.

JustHecate · 16/02/2012 17:53

I would move schools.

I know most people don't agree with this, but imo, the only thing that matters is that the child isn't going through a living hell. Don't care about 'running away', don't care about 'lettting the bully win' don't give a crap about any of that stuff- I'd just move them to another school and start again.

Being bullied can scar you for life - I know. I was bullied so badly I tried to kill myself. If it was happening to my child - I would not bother fighting it out, I'd take them out and move them.

Distended · 16/02/2012 17:53

Police! If the school wont help then there's very little choice

OpinionatedMum · 16/02/2012 17:53

I would inform the police too. She needs to learn her lesson.

Also she may have been treated badly at home herself. I know it is no excuse, but if the police get involved maybe she will both learn her lesson AND be helped.

CoffeeDog · 16/02/2012 17:53

Go to Police -The school will HAVE to then deal with her. Also with any luck her parents may step in when they find out what a little cow bag they have dragged up..... but dont bet on it.

ajandjjmum · 16/02/2012 17:53

You must contact the Head tomorrow and tell him your inclination is to get the police involved. You poor thing - and poor DS.

Proudnscary · 16/02/2012 17:54

I'm very sorry for your son and agree you should go to the police - this is absolutely terrible for him.

I abhor the language you are using to describe this child though, no matter what she has done.

OpinionatedMum · 16/02/2012 17:54

It made me feel suicidal too.

bringbacksideburns · 16/02/2012 17:55

What does your son say? Is he Okay? Did anyone witness the assault that he knows?

Ring the school tomorrow and ask for head teacher contact number and i second printing odd the fb Account and police involvement.

How horrible. Are they in the same class?

conspire · 16/02/2012 17:55

I think it is a police matter. Going to the school will cause it to flare up and it won't get stopped, she will just get a lecture on hurting people feelings (as if that isn't the intent). Going to the police will scare the crap out of her and if she continues you can escalate it. They may be able to treat it as stalking as well as assault etc.

I would consider moving your ds if at all practical.

akaemmafrost · 16/02/2012 17:55

I agree with Hecate. My child would not return to that school to be abused in that way.

You have to get the police involved you really do Sad. Your poor ds.

newbiedoobiedoo · 16/02/2012 17:56

Go to the police. Not much else you can do is there?! Just make absolutely certain that your son is 100% innocent in this.

KWL51 · 16/02/2012 17:57

I say call the police too. In my limited experience (14yr old ds who has been on receiving end of bullying) it doesn't stop until the police are involved. No matter how popular or unpopular your son is don't expect anyone even eye witnesses to make statements though :(
Often involving just the school makes it worse as makes the bully angry involving the police means parents become involved and lets everyone know that this is unacceptable behaviour.

KWL51 · 16/02/2012 17:58

Oh and I hope your ds is ok, poor boy must be awful for him. Facebook is a horrible thing. I hate all this you must get as many 'friemds' as you cqn