to feel snubbed by lack of invitation?

[IveGotTightsOlderThanYouLove]

It's a good friend's hen do in a couple of weeks' time. It'll cost me around £200 to attend (a LOT of money for me!).

Out of the twelve or so people invited to the hen, two of us aren't invited to the wedding reception. On the email list to organise the hen, they're all discussing what they're wearing for the wedding (I think only I and the other woman know that we're not invited).

Over the past year or so I've helped my friend and her fiancee out a few times when they've been stuck and seem to be a bit of a first-port-of-call for them. We've known each other for about five years.

For the reception, they've hired a hall and a DJ, so numbers aren't overly-restricted.

So am I being over-sensitive, or is this a snub?

I've not heard anything more from the bride-to-be or my friend. I text my friend though to suggest that she backs out of the hen too. I said we should get together for a drink or something soon.

Well done flower. You've done very well. Your heart must be beating very fast if you're not used to being so assertive but I do think you've done a good job!

Well done Tights! I hope your other friend follows suit especially as she now knows she can do so without losing any deposit ;)

Thanks Blueberties and everyone else who's knocked some sense into me.

Yes, it feels absolutely awful, but I am a doormat no more! :)

Oh wow, that's something else! Well done for having the big hairy balls to stand up to this lying (thieving?) pair. I think you know exactly how the bride views you now - a free lunch ... drinks ... maybe dinner as well for £80. Here's hoping your other friend doesn't go either!

Yes, Oggy, of course! I'd totally forgotten to tell my friend. Will text her now!

I think others were much more vocal and supportive. I am quietly pleased for you.

If other 'hen invitees' hear about this, they might well pull out, too.

Well done Tights! I am even more cross on your behalf that the HO has ALSO tried to take the piss! You sound lovely - you are much better off without these people in your life!

Woohoo! I knew they were trying to pull one over on you. What a horrible pair.

Well done Tights. Congratulations on being so sensible and grown-up and assertive but, at all times, well-behaved about all this.
She is a fool to lose such a good friend.

I know these are supposed to be for 'thanks' but really tights you deserve them plus some for having the ººs to do all that

well done tights!!!!!

Let other not-good-enough-for-the-wedding-but-good-enough-for-the-hen friend know exactly what's happened. Suggest she pulls out too and the pair of you go for a boozy lunch/dinner/evening with your £200!

Yay OP!

Well done Tights!

Brilliant !

Bravo, Tights! Glad MN was of help to you. Delete these moochers out of your life. There is a world full of nice people who don't take the piss out of friends. Onwards and upwards!

Thanks all!

...of course I must bear in mind that the HO may have paid, but it hasn't hit their account yet, or some other problem, so I'm not ready to think of her as a liar...yet!

So if you can persuade your other friend not to go, you have saved yourself £400!!!! Just think what you could DO with that money!

You know, it's quite sad really that all of us cynical old bints were right and the "nice" people turned out to be wrong. It is a bit sad really. I wish they'd been right, and the bride had said "oh gosh I'm so sorry of course you're invited the misunderstanding is my fault" and the ho had said "hang on, I'll see what I can fix with the venue, we might get away with it - what a shame you feel that way".

But no, they were hard and horrible and it's a shame.

but well done tights.

But this has been "booked" for some time, non? Bank transfer issue woulld seem to be unlikely........

And don't you dare pay either of these con artists a penny! Even if they come back with some cock and bull story, you heard it from the horse's mouth, they haven't paid anything and you won't either.

Put them on block. Delete them. They are not friends, but con artists and users.

Well done OP

I have had to stand up to a person who treats others badly and you do feel awful immediately after doing it. However, these feelings will change to relief and liberation - that you are not going to be trampled on any more.

She'll say she paid for it because she is a liar and a user, Tights. Don't fall for it. She can whistle for it. Put them on block. Delete from your life.

OMG well done Tights. Bloody, bloody well done you.

But fucking hell at bride and the organiser. Trying to do you out of a deposit when it hadn't even been paid yet. Just when you think you've seen the worst of people, they manage to plumb new depths. Personally, I'd let the other 'making the numbers up' friend know that you found out no deposit had been paid when you were told it had. And accidentally copy it in to everyone else.

Fucking bitches. [hangry]

That £200, treat yourself with it. You deserve it.