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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Babysitter having sex?!

210 replies

JaneFonda · 30/04/2011 17:57

This is a long story, I'll try to keep it short.

On Wednesday night, me and DP went out and asked a family friend's DD (17) to babysit for our DS's (7 and 5), we said her boyfriend could come round as well as they are both lovely teens.

Everything seemed fine, until today.

We have security cameras in/around our house and DP was checking them as there has been a group of teenagers causing nuisance around our neighbours' house over the past couple of weeks, so was seeing if any damage was caused, when he called me over.

On the camera, we saw the babysitter and her boyfriend kissing, then beginning to get undressed before disappearing into another room, and coming out some time later. I can only assume they had sex in there, and I feel quite disgusted and as though our home has been violated.

DS's were fast asleep upstairs, so no concern there, but I just don't know what to do. WWYD?

OP posts:
A1980 · 30/04/2011 19:07

I can't beleive the hell the OP is getting.

It is the OP's HOME and she is paying someone to care for her children. This baby sitter is being paid to care for the OP's children and she's busy fucking her boyfriend.

Little tramp. I'd never have her as a babysitter again.

Age is no excuse. I baby sat children from 16-22 and I would never have wanted to have sex in someone elses home.

Also it's her home she can have CCTV if she wants to. There have been cases where parents have been suspcious and put CCTV in their home while the babysitter / nanny has been there. There are instances of seeing the carer physically abusing the child, slapping them etc, some of them only babies. The footage was taken to the police and beleive me, it is not illegal to have CCTV in your own home.

I trust you'd all have the utmost sympathy for the OP if the footage revealled the babysitter slapping her children and you wouldn't have a problem with CCTV then?

crystalglasses · 30/04/2011 19:09

Does that mean the op is filming any visitor that comes into her house? I wouldn't like that if I was visiting, even if I knew about it.

A1980 · 30/04/2011 19:12

Who gives a damn about CCTv these days. I am probably caught on camera several hundred times a day. I work in london.

Every bus, every train, every street, every building has CCTV. Your DC's probably get caught on CCTV several hundred times a day outside. You haven't explicitly consented. Why don't you all complain to get it banned as it's violating their rights.

farkthatforagameofsoldiers · 30/04/2011 19:13

"Little tramp. I'd never have her as a babysitter again."

Nice.

OP, not going to give you any stick but seriously, what the hell did you expect? I don't particularly want my babysitters shagging their boyfriends when responsible for my kids so therefore I would say no to him coming round.

If you had no clue this was likely to happen then you are deluded quite frankly.

Southcoastsarah · 30/04/2011 19:14

OP do you ever have sex while your kids are asleep?

marmaladetwatkins · 30/04/2011 19:16

"Little tramp. I'd never have her as a babysitter again."

What the fucking fuck? A girl over the age of consent is having sex with her boyfriend? And that makes her a tramp? Hmm

BumWiper · 30/04/2011 19:17

A198?0 why are you calling the babysitter names?

Emmanana · 30/04/2011 19:17

Interesting first post, JaneFonda!
Strikes me as a bit odd that they got undressed then felt the need to go into another room to continue if they were in the full throes of lust - wouldn't they have done it there and then? Going somewhere private, it's almost lke they knew they could be seen. Maybe they weren't doing anything at all.
Maybe she was just showing him her new tattoo.....Smile

CareyFakes · 30/04/2011 19:17

I think you kinda walked into that senario eyes wide shut! C'mon, classic senario, think Rita, Sue and Bob too, you get the picture.

Babysitting is the opportunity to have steamy sex with your boyfriend, I respect the fact that she had asked you if he could sit with her.

Filming? Bit creepy

usualsuspect · 30/04/2011 19:20

'Little tramp'

what a lovely thing to call a 17 year old girl Hmm

I would delete the footage pretty damn quick if I were you op

YABU ,and naive to think they wouldn't have sex ,if you didn't have cameras you would never have known

ilovepancakes · 30/04/2011 19:20

OMG! leave the op alone,
not ALL teenagers are like that!

RumourOfAHurricane · 30/04/2011 19:21

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BitOfFunPipPip · 30/04/2011 19:25

Utility corridors give me the major horn though. Totally understandable.

RumourOfAHurricane · 30/04/2011 19:26

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TheSecondComing · 30/04/2011 19:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BumWiper · 30/04/2011 19:28

lol goldicocks Grin

worraliberty · 30/04/2011 19:29

Perhaps it was just orbs

NulliusInVerba · 30/04/2011 19:31

Sorry OP but your story sounds a bit dodgey to me (and many others it appears)

So they were at it in a utility corridor, yes? Right, ok.

Firstly, being filmed when you are not aware is a fear of alot of people, especially teenagers, I would be very upset if this had happened to me.

Secondly, you told her she could have her boyfriend over at yours. Really, what did you think they would do??? Were you never 17? Were you just born aged 35?

Im not buying it, sorry.

Newgolddream · 30/04/2011 19:37

Little tramp. I'd never have her as a babysitter again

What a nasty statement that is, sex is a normal natural enjoyable thing to do - why does this make this gilr a "tramp" for sleeping with her boyfriend (regardless of where it has occured)

oohlaalaa · 30/04/2011 19:38

YABU. I'd have proabably done the same thing at 17. Blush

squeakytoy · 30/04/2011 19:39

If you had seen then taking drugs, or getting pissed, then I could understand you being furious. Having sex does not put your children at risk, and is the age old "perk" of babysitting. What do you really expect a 17yr old to do with her boyfriend when they have a house and some (they think) privacy.

Your kids were never in any danger, nor was your house violated.

You should have told her there were cameras filming though beforehand. People expect cctv in the street, not when they are in a private home.

SauvignonBlanche · 30/04/2011 19:39

YABU and very naive.

breathing · 30/04/2011 19:40

I dont see th big deal with cameras i the house. Im used to this as many friends have them (uaually used at night)

buggerlugs82 · 30/04/2011 19:40

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This post has been withdrawn due to privacy concerns.

BitOfFunPipPip · 30/04/2011 19:44

I had a fifteen year old babysitter who left an open bag of coke under my bed once. I managed not to feel violated though- I just didn't ask her again.