200 days alcohol free- anyone wish to join?

[FeelingLessTired]

Several years ago, under another user name I did a 100 day alcohol free challenge and alot of people joined me on MN. It was before covid, so a long time ago!

I really appreciated the support and lasted 120 days in the end. ironically enough DH joined me IRL and he just continued on and has been teetotal since then.

I was reading Annie Grace back then (I think) and her recommendation was that if you slip, to then challenge yourself for double the time- hence I now wish to start and achieve a 200 day challenge.

I'd love some company if anyone wishes to join me!

I have a funeral today and plan to drink J20 with tonic water. The deceased was a good friend of DH's and although he was in his early 70s drinking definitely played a part in his extreme fragility over the past few years. He's been really ill for a good ten years I think.

I have set out a spread sheet with my alcohol-free savings. In the last week i have definitely reduced and have saved just shy of £50 already (since the beginning of April) as we have had a fair few dinners and lunches out. I look at what I would have drunk (sauvignon blanc here and there) and when i have not had it I add that cost to my spreadsheet. That does help to inspire me because COL is biting us hard right now.

Afternoon, how are we all today ?
I had a lovely day yesterday and it looks like today it's set to continue.
No cravings to do anything - I think that's the problem with me sometimes. Drinking was definitely something to do.
Also, boredom. I've actually written a list of Things To Do when I'm bored.
Happy to chill ❤️

@Goandygo I think you've answered your own 'why?' question at the beginning of that post where you said about it being such an ingrained habit!

Interested in your Things to Do when bored list if you're open to sharing any of it?

Had a good day today! I've had to travel a couple of hours for a workshop tomorrow as part of my qualification, so I've used DH's hotel points and booked in at a nice so hotel tonight so I don't have to do the drive first thing tomorrow. I got here a bit earlier and went to a museum this afternoon. Remember I said I got so drunk on my own out once that a bartender had to walk me back to the hotel? Well that was here (different hotel!) - I had intended to go to the museum then first thing in the morning but obviously I was too hungover to get up in time and dragged myself to the event I was down for (hanging out of my arse!). So a mooch about today was lovely.

I've got dinner ordered and just having a water with it, they do have AF cocktails but I'm not that fussed about them so just sticking with water and I'll have a hot drink after. I do have a free drinks voucher too so I could have a glass of wine and not even pay for it but I'll use it for an hot drink instead. The pool here is open until 9pm so I'm planning on an evening dip once my dinner's gone down!

How is everyone else doing?

@paintcolourchart oohh that all sounds lovely. Love a night in a hotel. I remember your bartender story - so nice to do it differently.
On my list when I'm bored - some nice things- go for a walk, read a book to some not so nice, eg clean the bathroom. I usually find I'm not bored enough to clean the bathroom.
Today, during a moment of boredom, I cleaned my bedroom.
Rock n roll here.

There is so much booze around me right now. The table literally right in front of me has a beer and a large glass of white wine in my face (white wine was my old favourite). I don't even want it. I could if I really wanted to - literally even have a voucher to cover it but I just don't. I'm really looking forward to my evening swim and I definitely wouldn't do that after a glass of wine. Got a decaf cappuccino on the way. I feel like my life has changed so much over the last year or so - no caffeine, no gluten, no meat and now no alcohol 😂

@Goandygo I bloody hate cleaning the bathroom too! My issue isn't boredom (atm there's too much to do for that to be the case) but my issue is thinking it's making me relax and also just the ingrained habit of course.

Oh I meant to say - after I read your post about a daytime bath I decided I would treat myself yesterday! We had a really busy afternoon but before we went out I caught up on the chores and then had a lovely soak with my audiobook on - it felt so indulgent in the middle of the day! Then I spent all evening working/studying (I stopped at midnight 🙄) but I didn't feel so hard done by as I'd had my daytime bath and afternoon out!

Does anyone here use bath salts? I think I might be doing it wrong - I bought a kilo bag and it only went across 3 baths - is that right??

@paintcolourchart keep thinking of that evening swim. You're being very strong and sensible 💪
I don't use Bath salts sorry 🤣

So I'm back from my evening swim - pool was teeny, it was full of attractive slim people (think swanning about in thong bikinis and chisled men), and my ear phone batteries died after a few lengths. For a fleeting second I did think I shouldn't have bothered and should have sat in the hotel bar with a wine but of course that's just silly. I'm now in my pjs admiring the dock view I have (photo attached!) and devil wears prada is on the tv. Need to be up bright and early tomorrow for a full on day.

I did have a little laugh to myself when I walked into what essentially felt like Love Island and I rocked up in my swimming hat and goggles 😅

Hope everyone is keeping strong!

Apologies for my quantity of posts of late!!

hi all- just dipping in super quick, sorry, will write properly later. Day 45 / 10 for me.

Your view is lovely @paintcolourchart !

You are strong @Goandygo well done for resisiting!

sorry for the drive-by posting. Back later

Morning !
How are we all ?
All good here. Well, actually I don't feel great, but I think it's the weather. I'm trying to adjust. I'm still always grateful I'm sober.
120 days today, and I had to look it up. I think that's a good sign.
Actually, as I'm definitely a half glass is full person, this weather does not make me want to drink. It does the opposite - hot chocolate all the way.
❤️💯

Morning all.

@Goandygo 120 days is absolutely amazing! You should be very proud of yourself. How is your shoulder these days btw?

I have a confession to make. I did have a bottle of wine last night. Contemplated not telling you all actually but then I really would be lying to myself. It was sort of planned and wasn't impulsive, so I am sort of counting it as a win. We thought about it on Monday, discussed it and decided not to, but said we might Wednesday, which we did. I'm not quite sure how I feel about it tbh. I think generally I would like to be AF, because I'm so aware now of the affects it's having on my body - generally I'm very health conscious but somehow wine never factored in but now it does. Today would have been day 76, but I have had two bottles of wine over two different nights in that time period. So still a huge movement but obviously that's two slip ups now. I haven't filled in my try dry app for yesterday yet, I think I might put in that I was AF just because I do like seeing the big number but obviously in my head it's more 74/76 days. I'm not going to beat myself up over it because it was intentional, and I know exactly the reason why I wanted it, I just need to contemplate how I go forwards.

How is everyone else doing?

@paintcolourchart thanks. I'm very proud, yes.

Don't worry too much about the blip. Look at the whole picture. You have a very sensible approach to it. So what if you enjoy some every now and again, you're doing it your way.
I couldn't have just one bottle or even one glass. I'd be right back at square 1. It's best for me I abstain completely.
Yes to contemplating how you go forward. I think that's a great idea.
P.s My shoulder has pretty much healed, thanks. How's your war wound ?

Yes, I'm worried that what at the moment looks like a couple of blips will become more regular over time and I'll be back where I was before. I can't allow that. If patterns keep repeating I'll have to just completely stop altogether. I haven't done my stars since the first time I had some either. Not sure how to move forward with them. I was thinking maybe every week that I stay under government guidelines but then will that give me 'permission' to drink every week and escalate and get out of hand again. Not sure, im not making any decisions yet but I really can't go back to before, and if there's any risk of that then I just can't have any.

so glad your shoulder is pretty much repaired! My ankle isn't doing so well. I thought it was getting better but it's not. I have booked an appointment with an orthopaedic consultant through my health insurance but it's not for a month, and that's private as well. I think I'm going to have long term issues with it tbh.

@paintcolourchart god, so sorry to hear that about your ankle. The pain in my arm / shoulder helped me abstain as it was a constant reminder.
I understand where you're coming from regarding abstaining / moderating, and the future.
Do you feel unhappy with it ? Bored ? Incomplete?
I know in the past, I've missed it.
Not so much now, but it's hard when it's previously been a big part of your life.

I went through a phase where I just had 1 bottle of wine a week. I was amazed that I was finally adhering to government guidelines. I think I did it for about a year.
It crept back up though 🥴, but I do remember it being a happy period.

This is going to sounds ridiculous, but I did my ankle on a VERY rare night out. My issue is home drinking and because it happened on such a rarity it's like my brain can't connect the fact that my relationship with drinking is what caused it. When (I feel like it's an inevitable when tbh) they tell me I've fucked it up permanently, that might well be decision made.

I don't really know how I feel about it tbh. On one hand I feel great without it and I'm forming so many more healthy habits and definitely starting to look better. But on the other hand it was nice to have some wine with DH and have a chill and a chat the other night. I KNOW I don't need it to relax, but I do still feel that pull. Maybe I need to abstain and give it longer? Not sure.

It doesn't help that I've got my submissions and exams in less than two months, so the stress is ramping up. This is the biggest submission of my whole career and will be the defining part of whether I can qualify in my field or not. That really doesn't help because the pressure is mounting and sometimes (like this week) it feels like the only outlet is a bottle of wine over an evening.

I am still pleased both blips were considered in advance and were not impulsive though. But I do need to work out what I actually want going forward.

How is everyone doing?

Sooo I almost had another blip last night (I don't think I could have counted that as a blip though!).

It had only been two days, that tells me all I need to know really. I had a bath instead.

Happy Saturday, everyone!

@paintcolourchart well done for not caving !
I had a 0% rose zerosecco from aldi. It was so nice I actually had mixed feelings.
On one hand, I enjoyed it so much it could be my drink. On the other, it almost triggered me to want to drink again it gave me such a high.
Only £2.99, and about 150 calories roughly for the whole bottle.

Hi all. Sorry for silence.

I've been drinking. Stopped at Day 43. Feel pretty crap about it. Admitting it here.

I'll drink today, I don't even have the ability to resist right now. Tomorrow is another day.

Day 19 vegetarian though. Not that this was the aim of the thread, but even so.

Hugs to you. xxx

(FWIW I always rated the Aldi zereosecco).

Oh no,not day 43. I never completed day 45. See, can't even count. So my last AF was day 44. [facepalm]

@FeelingLessTired please just look at the big picture. You know you can go 40 odd days without it. You've shown strength, resilience and determination on your af journey.
It's just part of the process - so many people have hundreds of day 1s, hundreds.
Don't be hard on yourself - you haven't killed anyone. You're doing your best - it's not easy making these big changes, but you're having a go. ❤️
For today, just relax, be good to yourself. Take a mental break if you have to, but please focus on the positives and how far you've come.

@FeelingLessTired sorry to hear how you're feeling. What day 'would' today have been?

Here is a totally safe space to admit this, we all relate which is why we're all here. It's not easy. I refrained last night but I don't know if I will tonight. I was doing so well until 9 weeks in. Just goes to show what a hold it has. I'm not sure if you've read my most recent posts but I have drank on two occasions now.

Do you think there's anything triggering it?

Hugs back to you xxx

You are both so kind.

Triggers- well tbh it does not take much. Any excuse really.

There is a just a whirlwind of anxiety mostly. I can't even separate out my thoughts to articulate them. One of the bigger things at the mo is that we are considering shutting our life down here in the UK and packing up to move to Australia. I find that quite triggering, although we will not be moving anywhere near my parents and sister. They live in Victoria and we would be moving to nearer Queensland.

But that's not a 'reason'. I think the main reason is I am so uncomfortable in my skin and my default is to drink because it makes me feel better in the moment.

I'm trying to work it all through. It;'s like death of a thousand cuts. No one actual definitive stab. .

@FeelingLessTired sorry for slow reply. I'm ashamed to say I caved again last night. I have now put my 3 drink days into Try Dry - one or two days I could sort of overlook, but three makes it a pattern. I drank a bottle of wine again but this time I was very close to having a whisky. I don't even like whisky! I clearly can't moderate so it's back to abstaining for me. I'll resume my crystal stars too but I'll start a new row as that did definitely help for me. So my Try Dry app is now back at day 1, with my longest streak shown as 62 days. I've got another sobriety app though which I will allow to show the consecutive days, even though mentally I'll have to deduct 3 of those days.

The anxiety will definitely ease the longer you abstain. I think it took a good 40 days or so for mine to significantly lift, and now I've had a few drinking days it is starting to set in again. I definitely get being uncomfortable in your skin and drinking makes it feel better in the moment. Is there anything in particular you feel uncomfortable with? How are you feeling tonight? We are here ♥️

How is everyone else doing?

@FeelingLessTired yes, I agree with @paintcolourchart regarding anxiety. Though I do understand why you're anxious, regarding the possibility of moving. I'd be the same. My head would be all over the place and thoughts and fears would be silenced with wine.
I did it all the time when I was teaching.
@paintcolourchart Put it behind you now. It's not the end of the world. You know your capabilities, it's just life gets in the way, that's all. Great idea to go back to your crystals as that was working well for you.
I was tempted yesterday. Dh and I were undecided about whether to go out or not as it was a lovely day. We stayed in because I'd already been walking (15,000 steps) - and I was a bit jaded. I had a 0% lager with lime cordial. Quite nice.
But if we'd have gone out, I think I'd have had a low alcohol wine, as that's been plaguing my mind recently.
Feel OK today. I actually woke up, remembering the times I woke surrounded by wine bottles, and I did thank God I've turned a corner.

@Goandygo it's actually scary that after so many days AF we are still thinking about it. For a while I wasn't and I knew it was too good to be true! Need to get back to that mindset. I noticed that all my balls dropped at once - within the same week I'd stopped MFP/consciously losing weight, stopped swimming 3-4 mornings a week, stopped being so careful about cutting gluten out and tried the wine again. Safe to say I no longer look or feel as healthy as I did and I've had 3 bottles this month. The fact I was so close to pouring a whisky shows me that long term abstaining really is the best idea. I am looking at the bigger picture and I am really pleased with my progress in the last 10 weeks, but clearly I still have more work to do and I feel ok about starting my Try Dry app again because I've got another one alongside it which I haven't changed. You're doing so well not giving into cravings! How do you work through them out of interest? I started a new knitting project last night which will help on evenings I'm not working/studying.

@FeelingLessTired how are you doing today? Xx

@paintcolourchart regarding working through cravings, to be honest I don't think I've been tested too strongly yet. The cravings I describe are more fleeting thoughts.
I could have easily drank in France I suppose, but again I wasn't tempted because of the medication. That helped initially.
I suppose I've tried to give up so many times. Dry January etc, I could never get past 10 days. I know deep down if I go back on it, it will kill me eventually.
Sounds dramatic but I could easily have been run over after I fell last time. Thank god 2 hikers were passing.