200 days alcohol free- anyone wish to join?

[FeelingLessTired]

Several years ago, under another user name I did a 100 day alcohol free challenge and alot of people joined me on MN. It was before covid, so a long time ago!

I really appreciated the support and lasted 120 days in the end. ironically enough DH joined me IRL and he just continued on and has been teetotal since then.

I was reading Annie Grace back then (I think) and her recommendation was that if you slip, to then challenge yourself for double the time- hence I now wish to start and achieve a 200 day challenge.

I'd love some company if anyone wishes to join me!

I have a funeral today and plan to drink J20 with tonic water. The deceased was a good friend of DH's and although he was in his early 70s drinking definitely played a part in his extreme fragility over the past few years. He's been really ill for a good ten years I think.

I have set out a spread sheet with my alcohol-free savings. In the last week i have definitely reduced and have saved just shy of £50 already (since the beginning of April) as we have had a fair few dinners and lunches out. I look at what I would have drunk (sauvignon blanc here and there) and when i have not had it I add that cost to my spreadsheet. That does help to inspire me because COL is biting us hard right now.

Morning.

Interesting what you say @paintcolourchart about it being a confirmation for you that alcohol isn't really all that. I do feel like that with my much more extended (by days and days) fuckit moment!

I 100% agree about not going back to Day 1. I like counting days because it reminds me of my achievement.... but it's got to be a system that works for us and how we are as individuals. I know if I become too rigid I just set myself up for failure.

I'm off out again (I am distracting myself by taking the DCs to a local English heritage site- they have been persuaded by promises of cake). But wanted to drop in and say hi again.

Oh! Day 37 for me and also Day 2 of being vegetarian. I always used to joke that DH is the healthiest person around and I should just copy him. He's in his 70s, teetotal, vegetarian and runs, cycles, goes to the gym and has a very manual hobby. His resting heart rate is around 50 as his normal state (although this does mean when he gets a cold he has a tendency to faint as his heart rate dips). He looks a good 10 years younger and I am alot younger than him but in a comparatively shocking state healthwise. I'm going to try and be veg full time, but that is another thing that I hope not to beat myself up if I slip. I think I need to focus on optimising my health rather than weightloss and hopefully being teetotal (the major component I think) will be given an added boost.

That's the vague plan anyway!!

Love to you all. Hope everyone has a great day!

@FeelingLessTired yes exactly, I'm the one who decided this for myself so it has to work for me. If last night really was the one-off I hope it to be, I don't feel the need to recount from day 1. If I have another bottle in a week then maybe! I kind of felt it brewing for the last few days anyway so I thought I would let myself try it. I've had a very lazy day today, which was partly planned but I literally haven't even done a load of laundry or the dishwasher yet. I know the wine is the reason for this. I've also been having healthy breakfasts every days for at least a month, and today all I wanted was stodge (and I had it).

It's funny you say about going veggie, finally after years of considering it I have gone pretty much veggie recently too (maybe a month or so ago?). I do have meat very occasionally and I don't beat myself up about it either. It's my choice so if I choose to be veggie 98% of the time then I don't think it has to be all or nothing. Sort of like wine, I suppose? I did say to DH last night that if I fancy wine again in a few days or a week because I had it last night, then maybe I really shouldn't have it at all. It's all a learning curve isn't it! Hope you had a great day at the national trust property!

*English Heritage

That all makes alot of sense to me @paintcolourchart

Thanks! We did have a nice time. The boys had Victoria sponge and hot chocolates and I had an insanely rich mushroom soup. Could not finish it all, but it was good. .

Now I am watching vidoes about vegetarian family meals while cooking our veg roast. DH is delighted. He used to be a hunting, shooting fishing type and his friends think he is nuts (mostly farmers and hunting types also). DH is the sort who would never express an opinion about my eating or drinking (or weight, bless him) but I know he is quite pleased at the prospect of a series of veg meals coming his way cooked by me.

It's a good day, in short. I am so glad i am back to AF. I have been totally out of sorts for a few weeks.

❤

@paintcolourchart I think that's a great attitude and a good result really regarding learning curves.
I agree don't go back to the beginning.
You know what you're doing, you know what you want your future to look like and I think you're doing fantastically.

Morning, tribe !
Lovely here today. Typical. Yesterday we shopped in the rain. Erghhhh. Threw ourselves into the pubs for refreshments - if ever I could have gone off track, it was Yesterday.
But....I didn't....and today.....drum roll.....100 days.
🥳
I've had meals out, days out, a birthday, a wedding anniversary - etc, all af.
15 af weekends when before I struggled to get to 2.
My accident was the catalyst and the tablets helped me abstain. Definitely.

Benefits so many :

• skin clearer
• I've lost 15lbs
• I've saved at least £750
• anxiety reduced and I'm definitely happier overall.

Had a few wobbles but nothing major. Don't feel like I'm missing out. Loving af lagers to join in, etc.

So, I'm at the top of the mountain. Climb up was ok overall. Will the climb down be more difficult, easier or the same ?
I think it will be the same. Whatever it is, I'm still taking one day at a time, not going to be complacent.
Thanks to @FeelingLessTired for starting the thread and to you all for your support. It's been priceless ❤️💯

Well done @Goandygo!!!! Reading you've reached 100 days put a huge smile on my face this morning - huge achievement and you should be very proud (as are we!).

I'm actually really surprised at all the benefits I've experienced. I've read many a time what the benefits are but I stupidly didn't expect to experience them all, not sure why!

I would have been at day 65 today. I'm still counting today as day 65 but obviously I know that I've had a bottle of wine, so it's 64/65 but I'm not beating myself up over it. I think in a strange way I did need it to show myself that actually I really don't need it.

To reinforce @Goandygo's positives, I'm going to set out all the negatives off the back of the bottle I had on Friday:

-the same as I said above, so increased heart rate, sloppy sex, chatting shit etc.
-I didn't go for a morning swim yesterday.
-I had an unhealthy breakfast when normally my breakfast is really healthy.
-I had a Chinese takeaway for dinner, so not only is that expensive and not healthy it's also full of gluten which for me isn't ideal.
-I did nothing productive all day until the evening and just felt sluggish all day (even though I didn't feel 'hungover' as such).
-I spent money I could have spent on something else.

So in summary @FeelingLessTiredyou were right and I should have abstained 😅 but I do feel like I had to 'find out' if that makes sense.

How's everyone else doing?

@paintcolourchart yep, all those negatives were me, at least once a week. Sometimes 2.
Day 65 is great ❤️

@Goandygousually 3 for me!!! What on earth was I thinking

My goodness! Two lots of celebrations!!

Day 100!!!!!

And Day 65!!!!!

For me I am Day 38 and Day 3 of being a veg-head.

Loving my new focus on good quality food. Tonight I am doing an easy dinner of pasta with basil pesto and peas with steamed pumpkin on the side as I need to use it up. I really FEEL like I am doing something now for my health and wellbeing. Being alcohol-free is the most important part, but working out my food issues is bringing me optimism and happiness.

Writing white on hold to the bank so will sign off for now. But so so pleased to have this thread and all of you. xx

@FeelingLessTired I'm not sure I can exactly celebrate 65 days because of Friday 😅 but I can celebrate a really good stretch of time and a complete change in attitude towards wine, which was confirmed with Friday's escapades.

@FeelingLessTiredhow is going veggie going? Your dinner sounds delicious! Absolutely loving the positivity in your post 🥰

I finally went back to the pool today after about 10 days off - definitely needed it!

Massive congratulations on your 100 days, those benefits are really positive too, reduced anxiety is the one at the top of my list. I’m hoping it gets easier to get through events, I need to decide if I’m going to the work Christmas party. It’s the one event I don’t feel ready to do AF but I would like to go, but I probably won’t.

Such a good idea to write all the negatives down to read back on any wobbles. I know what you mean about showing yourself you don’t need it, sounds like you’re doing great!

Well done on day 38, hopefully 39 now! I have very limited time at the moment, but my aim is learning how to cook as soon as I have the time to dedicate to it (alongside remaining AF that is!)

Hello @starlight128 ! So good to see you.

Cooking is a drag when you have limited time, I agree 100% Actually the endless merry-go-round of thinking what to cook is a drag as well.

I confess I was always AF at my work Christmas parties. Mainly because I had an awful toxic workplace and was worried about what I would say if I had a few drinks under my belt. It would not have been pretty. 😅

Day 39 / Day 4 veg. Gosh, we are not too far off needing a new thread as well!

@starlight128 thanks for your post. It made me smile and actually reminded me to stop for a bit and think about how far I've come. I've not actually done that.
I really need new pjs so I think I'll reward myself - I've not done that either !
(Although I did buy a dress from the charity shop. It didn't look like it'd fit - was chuffed it did.
£2.99 🤣).
Regarding your Christmas party @starlight128 I never thought I could go out and not drink. Never in a million years. I'm going to a party end of October and I'm looking forward to not drinking.
If you let us know your concerns regarding the party, we can maybe help ?

@Goandygo oh wow you definitely need to go out and get yourself a treat!! 100 (well 101 now) is huge!! New pjs is definitely a good one as you can enjoy them at the same time of day as you would have been drinking. I wish I'd left the wine in the shop and bought myself that book now instead 😅 I bet that was a great feeling when the dress fitted!!

@starlight128 I never thought I could go to a drinking event and not drink, but I did about 2-3 weeks in and it was great! I really enjoyed myself, had no ill effects and definitely did not have any less fun than the drinkers! I would highly recommend it and next year no matter I've decided about my drinking I will be going to that event AF. How have you been getting on?

Well done on day 39 @FeelingLessTired! Are you finding it's beginning to get easier or not yet? I noticed that about the thread too - we are a chatty bunch!

Just saw this on Instagram and thought I'd post it here x

Hi all- day 40 for me and day 5 veg.

Feel a bit flat today because without my slips it could have been 40 consecutive days. never mind. It;s better than nothing!!

Have a good day everyone!

@FeelingLessTired you're still doing really well. I think we have to focus on the positives and also remember how far we've come.
Yesterday was my first Mental Wobble. It's strange because I wasn't feeling flat. In fact, I was feeling really happy. Finances, weight, work - all much improved. And the seed was planted. This is danger area for me. I forget that the reason everything is running smoothly is because I'm not drinking.
I formulated in my head that I might drink this Friday ( day off, tennis on, I'm cooking, sorting Christmas etc) - the usual culprits for me.
It's strange as I'm not even craving the taste of wine - I don't even think I'd enjoy wine anymore.
Anyway, mentally I'm now back on track.
Drinking on Friday would be disastrous on so many levels.

@FeelingLessTired I feel a bit like that too with my slip up. My app says day 68 for me today but of course I know it isn't really. Technically it's day 5 but I can't bring myself to go back to day 5 after one calculated decision! If I hadn't had my 4 slip ups at the beginning today would have been day 85. Long term it won't matter exactly what day it is today. Not to sound too cheesy (sorry, I can't seem to help it!) but it really is about the overall journey and lifestyle change rather than how many days in a row. If a few slip ups has shown us that we really don't need it at all then that's ok, and is all part of the learning curve. We are changing habits that have formed over many many years which have been part of our weekly/daily lives. That is something to be proud of. Before I started this 1/3 of my days over the year were spent drinking (outrageous I know!), now my average for the year is 1/5. The longer time goes on the more this ratio will improve, that is the goal for me. I'm not sure if I'll stay tee total or not, but my goal is for that number to be more like 10/365 (with no out of control episodes!). You are getting there, don't underestimate the changes you are making and how far you've come.

@Goandygo that bloody seed. It's so hard to shift. Sounds like you have the right approach! We are here if the seed won't shift. I was finding that every morning I was feeling really confident about not drinking and then by the time the afternoon came around the seed was sprouting. That happened for a good 4-5 days before I just gave in to show myself that I wasn't missing much. Hopefully you can ride that wave but if you can't it won't necessarily be disastrous - I know that goes against the whole point of the thread being 200 days. But if your goal is long term and a drink during these 200 days will help reinforce that you don't need it, then I do think that's ok. It doesn't have to be a wild out of control night. I just sat on the sofa all evening with the bottle knowing I was likely to drink it, but I was conscious about how it was making me feel and even took some notes at the time to reflect on in the morning. My past self wouldn't have given a shit as long as I was nice and tipsy (or disassociated as I'm now realising). If you can ride the wave and avoid it obviously that is the best thing, but if you can't the alternative doesn't have to be going back to day 1 with a day 1 mindset. My mindset is still at day 68.

Thanks @paintcolourchart I do understand what you're saying. I think I'll be ok.
To be honest, I have to be ok because I can't go back to how I was. And if I did have a blip, I don't think I'd be as resilient as you and @FeelingLessTired - I'd probably give up and accept my fate.
I wouldn't mind if it were a physical craving, it's just wanting to do something. That's all it ever was - drinking just for the sake of it and lots of times I didn't even enjoy it.
I'm going to plan my day Friday - get some af beers in, watch the tennis, maybe some nice nibbles and definitely chocolate.
My granddaughters come all day Saturday and I want to be fresh and organised for them. They're my main motivators after all ❤️

Thanks both. xxx

I don't feel particularly resilient I confess @Goandygo !

I definitely often drink for the sake of it- even when not enjoying it. It's such an ingrained habit.

Planning is good for Friday. That's what scuppered me when I slipped while on holiday. I was not adequately prepared for the strains of being inside complex family dynamics again. We certainly get on better when I live on another continent!!

I agree though it is about an overall journey @paintcolourchart . You are right.

I'm going to break my goal up into smaller chunks. So... on Day 50 I am going to treat myself - as long as there have been no slips. I might get a facial or massage or maybe buy a new tshirt or something.

Hope everyone is well. have a good day!