The support thread (continued) for an alcohol free life. All welcome.

[WendyWagon]

Hello and welcome to the alcohol free support thread. We are a welcoming bunch. These threads were started by @drybird some three years ago.
We are a mixture of sober sisters (and the odd gent) who want to lead a alcohol free life. We chat about everyday things that we use to drink to manage. No question too silly. Someone will have done/thought or been through the same.

Good morning all.
Happy Wednesday.
A good day when I did the huge London commute in my 20s (I use to drive). I got to Wednesday and became hung ho happy. No drinking in those days due to the 5am starts. I looked fab (but we never think we do). Not worth driving these days due to the parking and congestion charges. I once had a BMW to match my lipstick!
I am off to Marks later to pick up some of these new AF drinks. I'll let you know how I get on dear friends.

Welcome @changeiscomingg8

I hope you have a lovely holiday. My top tip for moderating on this trip is to delay the start of your drinking. So don’t drink at lunchtime (say you are hungover from night before) and then have a soft drink to start the evening. It doesn’t sound much but it will make a difference overall.

I have read ALL the quit lit. My absolute favourite is Alcohol Explained by William Porter.

Good luck and have a good day everyone.

Welcome @changeiscomingg8, glad you have found your way here. Lots of lovely kind people here. It's a brave step to take when you realise you might need to change your relationship with drink, I found joining this thread very helpful - there are no judgemental sneers and it helps to have people who know and understand. I have done SMART recovery in the past, though AA wasn't really for me.

Different people find different resources helpful, but the ones that really helped me were the books "The Sober Diaries" by Clare Pooley and "The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober" by Catherine Gray. I cannot recommend them highly enough. Also, the One for the Road podcasts by SoberDave are worth listening to.

Every good wish to you.

Sending strength and love to all. Apologies for not responding more fully to everyone - having a bonkers week at work (but still AF - over a month since my last blip and feeling like the bunnies in the bunny field of @BunniesBunniesBunnies are waving to me from the horizon. It's a good place to be).

With love. xx (see you on the new thread - also happy to stand by as host if needed). x

Thanks for the tag @REP22😊 and glad to see you doing well! I’m glad of the tag as the thread popped up in my emails.
I’ve been taking a break from Mumsnet and so haven’t been keeping up with the thread but I’m still very much loving my sober life, three years and counting❤️❤️❤️

hope everyone is well @WendyWagon and all the others xxx

@BunniesBunniesBunnies Thank you! I am glad you are doing so well too, brilliant. 😀 When I have had weak moments, I have often thought about the bunnies quote that you signposted on here (this one, I believe - Mummy was a Secret Drinker: The Obstacle Course). Including last night, after having to deal with deep and foetid grimness at work which was followed by unexpected good progress at Slimming World (Slimmer of the Week this time!) - the "drown woes/celebrate glory" lure was strong. But I thought of the bunnies and kept hopping towards them (disclaimer: I did have fish and chips (small) instead😉).

Muchas gracias para las conejitas! 🐰🐇x

Good news all around then my sisters.
I have just put on a top from last year (it was too tight). Loose!
Well done @REP22 on your SW award.
I definitely eat so much more as a drinker. Cheese, crisps, big curries. More cheese.

I have the same mousetrap from a month ago.

@WendyWagon brilliant news re. the top, that's very encouraging. 😁 Drink definitely led to me overeating more - especially cheese. Although at my drinking worst I rarely ate at all (appetite suppressant effects and constant hangover/sickness). I lived on Complan and vitamin tablets, fool that I was. Thinner - but certainly not better - times. I'd rather have the weight.

Thank you for the welcome.

I am a wine drinker. I am much better than I used to be but if I let myself could quite easily drink 4 nights and it would be a bottle a night. Could even do 2 if I was day drinking into the evening.

I can't just have one. But actually I don't drink anything I don't enjoy so won't drink 'for the sake of it' on holiday unless I find a wine I like.

I'm taking my gym clothes on holiday so hoping that's some motivation 🤞

New thread started for when this one is full:

Shiny new thread here

And here’s a screen I saved from Sober Girl Society ages ago because it made me think.

@changeiscomingg8 I feel the same. I don't get drunk really. I don't have black outs, or get into rows or do embarrassing things. And I don't drink stuff I don't like either. But I can't just have one either. In fact the thought of putting the lid on/ cork in makes me irrationally angry!

It is incredible to be free of the shall I have a drink/ here are my rules kinds of conversations with myself (not all the time but so much more that I used to be).

Just posting this to help fill up the thread - and it makes me giggle

@stilldumdedumming sounds like me. The most I do is get anxious about saying something to upset someone even though I know deep down I haven't. I only really drink with my family as I don't go out much with friends due to us all having children now. I live in a different city to my office so don't even drink will colleagues much these days.

I'm definitely a lot better than I used to be. The 7 week reset at the beginning of the year did benefit me. But I know once my holiday is out the way, all my effort goes into stopping for good so I can stop this constant battle in my mind!

@Onewildandpreciouslife
Love it!
@changeiscomingg8 I was a fussy drunk. I love champagne.
I would buy bottles of the stuff. (I had a lot of friends in those days).
My sister used to say you can't be an alcoholic because you won't drink shit wine. I use to wait until I got home and 'rewarded' myself with the good stuff.
The games we play dear friends.

Another one who would only drink a specific drink (for me it was a certain rioja). Anything else I could take or leave... so I couldn't have had that much of a problem right?

"My" wine however was drunk by the vat. I was up to over a bottle on week nights and close to 2 bottles at weekends. I had days I didn't drink each week / did Dry January each year but that's where my drinking was when I stopped. I dread to think where I'd be now.

I can't even remember when and and how I went from only drinking on nights out / weekend wine at home but a bottle lasting the whole weekend to a bottle or two a night. It's so insidious and your consumption ans tolerance only ever goes one way.

I am remember this Crunch. You, FortheLove and I are all AF girls around Jan/Feb 2022.
Even though I have had my blips I know I couldn't drink a bottle a night and two on Friday and Saturday. I think I wound be really ill. The smell gets me too. Sour old socks. I dare not smell champ tho!
I did have a week when I thought f*'k, I need wine and I am fed up. But actually I was saved by one of our number. I never wanted a sponsor at AA, too close. I have enough family, thanks. But I did confess I was failing. However a surprise weight loss cheered me up and I thought do I want to have people saying 'ah, I knew Sav would be back on the grog'?
The answer was no. The first few weeks are blinking hard. I am not doing that again.

Wishing you all a safe and sober weekend.

We went to a new restaurant last night. They don't currently have a licence and charge prohibitive corkage, so very few people were drinking. What a chilled vibe! No raucous laughter, no 'that' table. What a difference! We had a jug of tap water.

Music festival locally for me this weekend. I wouldn't drink anyway at their prices!

@Pleasemrstweedie glad you have a good evening. @Blackberryblossom has started a new thread.
BB can you link please for MrsT
X

Here you go @Pleasemrstweedie , thank you wendy

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/alcohol_support/4837512-the-continuing-support-thread-for-living-alcohol-free-everyone-welcome?page=2